#remotivated

•recalibrate my goals and intentions

•plainly state what I need and don’t need at the present moment (something I have historically not been great at doing)

•remember why I put myself in this situation in the first place (because I believe in myself and my abilities)

•consider the value that I’ve placed on others’ opinions and input of my work

In my fit of rage, I threw what was left of my biryani in a fit of rage, banged my tiny desk with a handheld vacuum cleaner (both surprisingly sturdy), blocked the person who insisted on pressing the buttons that I repeatedly told not to, and called a bestie to help me cool down.

I started this whole “show your work” thing to remind MYSELF of what I’ve been doing so that on the days that I don’t feel like I can do anything (or I actually just can’t), I can look back and see that I am still making progress and when I finally get to where I want to be, I can remember the path that got me there (and have content for my future memoir and biofilm). I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to prove to others that I’m doing SOMETHING. I don’t put most of what I do on here because that would feel like the same thing. But if I remember that I’ve done at least 1 thing each day, that’s enough for me. Today I’ve done 4 bullets AND showered. That’s a whole 5 things!

Go me! 😊

Finished my second day of A-levels.

Life is good. Life is so good. Seriously. I have a new lease of life.

My Philosophy teacher took us all out of the classroom for one-and-a-half hours to the park because “philosophy isn’t something meant to be taught in the classroom” (I’m paraphrasing).

I managed to solve a puzzle that the rest of my Biology class couldn’t (and solved it in less time than my teacher did). It’s quite a clever challenge (try it!).

Somehow, I’m actually motivated to work.

Well I have been all over the place and at times totally off the slimming world plan and I have enjoyed it.  I’ve eaten what I have fancied and used MFP and my Fitbit to keep me in line and then just went to town in London and ate and drank to excess! It was great fun. I’ve enjoyed a break from really caring about any of it and just having fun however I feel awful for it, I’m tired, my stomach hurts, my skin is not is usual clear self, I’ve got less energy generally, I’m craving rubbish and have no set eating pattern or routine. I’m picking here and there and hungry and reaching for the wrong things. So time to get back to feeling wow again.  I also found that on days that I wasn’t training I couldn’t have that much to eat so I was often hungry, not something I am used to on Slimming World.