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Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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I’m sorry they got you Rory. If you get a new account I’m sorry I had to report that one.
A Fishmonger to his Valentine:
My fair one’s skin, like cod is white, Her lips are salmon’s true; Her eyes like mackerel sparkle bright, Like soles she’s firm and true.
From a Quack:
My Valentine my skill shall see, I’ll soon love’s pain allay; Belive me, fair I’m an M.D. What’s more – No cure no pay.
From a Porkman:
If my sparerib you will be I’ll devote my legs to thee; And whenever you fancy pork You shall have a knife and fork.
From a Dentist:
I clean the teeth – for teeth that’s white. Will make a kiss yield more delight; And if to love me you’ll agree Your teeth like ivory shall be.
From a Bookbinder:
Oh! were I my charmer to fold, – To press her what pleasure profound! Propitiously Hymen behold, And let us together be bound!
From The Trades People's Valentine Writer: Consisting of Appropriate Valentines, Entirely Original, For People of All Trades or Professions, October 1, 1829
Avatar: The Last Airbender Fic Recs
So, since I have some readers who aren’t familiar with atla, I have decided to use this opportunity to list some of my favorite atla fics! I will say one or two pairings are Zuko/Sokka, so I’ll tag them for people who don’t like the pairing. There are also two Zuko/Katara fics listed below and they are labeled as well.
ALL STORIES ARE LINKED IN THE NAME!
1. While Mighty Oaks Do Fall by @witch-of-endor (Sokka/Zuko) can’t rave about this more. I live for the next update - IN PROGRESS
High Sage Kenji blesses Fire Prince Zuko with the resilience of the reed, who bends in the wind and never breaks. When he is done, Fire Prince Ozai narrows his eyes, seemingly displeased by this blessing. But Kenji does not speak for himself; he is only a vessel.
-
The newly-crowned Fire Lord Ozai offers his firstborn son to service in the temple.
This turns out to be a catastrophic mistake.
2. Mountains and Badgermolehills by @glass-0nion 10/10 Zuko joins the Gaang early - COMPLETE
After the Blue Spirit frees the Avatar from the Pohuai Stronghold, Admiral Zhao captures Prince Zuko under suspicion of treason. Isolated from his Uncle and his crew, Zuko has only one ally: the chatty prisoner one cell over.
3. The Blackfish and the Dragon by ama (unsure if they have a tumblr) I don’t typically read Zuko/Katara but I love this!! 10/10 COMPLETE
Katara grew up in the Southern Water Tribe under the tutelage of Hama, the only waterbender ever to have escaped Fire Nation captivity. When Zuko arrives at the South Pole, seeking the Avatar, they are more than ready to defend him. Iroh watches as his beloved nephew throws himself at the ice walls again and again in an impossible siege–-and resolves to do anything it takes to save his nephew from himself. With the assistance of the Order of the White Lotus, he deposes his brother on the Day of Black Sun.
A week later, the Southern Water Tribe receives a petition for peace, and a proposal of marriage.
4. Such Selfish Prayers by @andromeda3116 another Zuko/Katara story! I loved this from Katara’s point of view. COMPLETE
Katara's ambition, so long set aside for the good of others, breaks free and sets fire to her soul. Or, Katara has a vision of her canon future, casts it aside, and becomes a world-changing politician instead.
5. The Dragon-King’s Temple by Kryal (unsure if they have a tumblr) now this is a CLASSIC crossover fic in the fandom. Not to age myself here, but I remember when the first chapter was posted as a teaser, then waiting, like, two years for the update. This might be nostalgia talking but I don’t think so 100/10 no pairing. Toph and Zuko adventure. crossover with Stargate SG-1 COMPLETE
Through the spite of the spirits or plain rotten chance, a door that would have been better left untouched has opened. On the other hand, with Fire and Earth as one's allies, sometimes escaping is the easy part.
Even the Dragon-King's temple floods.
6. The Family You Choose by TunaFishChris (unsure if they have a tumblr) a platonic soulmate with all the Gaang (including Suki and Zuko). Zuko’s point of view and it’s REALLY good. COMPLETE
Some people are born with soulmarks. Zuko has them, but his grandfather burned them off because they "make you weak."
Team Avatar has a few things to say about that.
Enjoy this small feast of Avatar the last air bender content!
Dead Ray's Comfort Series: The Monstrous Series by Lily Mayne
My goal is to be coherent in this review but I've yet to string together a solid readable sentence yet in all the attempts I've made to recommend it to all my pals because I am simply so fucking in love with this series. I love it so much I cannot think straight (pun intended). I'm not going to go over the plot as this is a seven book series with one novella and one short story anthology so far but I am going to rave about it, I'll give my general feelings on it, and I'll rank the books based on how much I liked each.
First of all, this is one of those series where I got to the end of the first book and just kept reading and rereading the last few paragraphs because I did not want it to end, and then, once I did, I sat there lost and feeling as though I had gone through an experience that I will never get to relive for the first time again. I even knew I had more books in the series to read and my first thought was still "What do I do now? Where do I go from here? How do I move on?"
I read one book of the series per day until I got to the final one, Lor, where I tried to pace myself to keep the high running for as long as possible. That's why it's taken me so long to get this out is because I refused to do so until I had consumed it entirely.
The world of this series is insane and amazing and fantastically horrifying and lovely all at the same time. A world where interdimensional rifts opened up and terrifying monsters streamed through and started slaughtering the world's population. Now humans are stuck living in military controlled cities where they can work for almost nothing, join the military or are left to fight for themselves out in The Wastes should they chose to leave.
Then there's the monsters, both the absolute nightmare fuel animalistic ones and the more human ones. Wyn is my favorite, from the very beginning and through the very end. Wyn is the best monster and his and Danny's story have my entire heart.
Lily Mayne is a phenomenal writer; she has snuck up on me and planted herself at #1 when it comes to authors (across all genres) I adore. Her perfectly balanced plots with just the right amounts of drama, comedy, and angst come with characters who are loveable and fall across a wide range of personalities. The plot never feels bogged down by too much happening at once and I love that it doesn't feel like the problems that arise have to have life-altering batshit insane solutions... Sometimes when you get kidnapped by a cult you just happen to be able to escape thanks to a disgruntled cult member and then sometimes your half-monster boyfriend sees the perfect chance to thrash your kidnapper in order to free you. As I sit here typing, I'm realizing what I like so much is they are big problems, complicated ones too, but they come with fairly uncomplicated and easy to accomplish fixes which means the story really can focus on the romance and these parts just add to the building of the relationships between the characters.
Okay, I'm starting to lose focus the more I think about them so my closing thoughts are: Holy shit I love this series so much, I immediately bought the physical copies of everything and I plan to spend my time between other books and the release of Lyri (hopefully in December) annotating them, perhaps I will share highlights of my favorite bits on here as I go through them again. Please Please Please Please Please, I will get on my knees, I will do anything if you read this series, I promise more than anything that these books are worth it. 10/10
And as promised, here is my ranking: note, the lower on the ranking doesn't mean I don't recommend it, it just means that these first four were ones I literally almost could not move on from, I will never get over them - but all of these books are stellar and the entire series should be read...
#1. Soul Eater (Wyn and Danny forever and ever, perhaps it's because they were the first ones but goddamn I can't move on from how much I love them and am so grateful they show up so frequently)
#2. Wyn (the novella between books three and four; it's Wyn and Danny so of course it's ranked second)
#3. Moth (Charlie and Moth giving some enemies to lovers vibesss)
#4. The Rycke (hjrfjkdwjkdjklew I am so fucking soft for Aury and Ghost ahhhhhhhhhh they are two precious beanssss)
#5. Lor (It strayed from the main group I had grown accustomed to but god Jugs and Lor are just so good, and it hurt my heart so much, and then it healed it, and it was just ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡)
#6. Seraph (Seraph has got to be the most monstrous love interest I've read about in any series and I adore him and his grumpy little Lilac fighting the odds and everyone around them to be together)
#7. Gloam (RIIIIGGGGG he's such a sweet little puppy and he will literally do anything, anything for Gloam who would do the same)
#8. Edin (Talk about a black cat and golden retriever pairing with Hunter and Edin, these two really make it work, and I hope Charlie did teach Edin the term size queen)
Would I read again? I plan to, I will be annotating these books and they are my treasured possessions now.
Would I recommend? What do I need to do to get this book in your hands right now? I'll do it. I think these are nothing short of a must read!

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Snowed in with the Bridgerton Brothers
It's snowy in my realm today and apparently freezing on both sides of the pond, so here is a list of wintry fics to help you warm up with our favorite Bridgerton boys 💙
If you want...
To be snowed in with smutty lovely modern Benedict: Somewhere Only We Know by @fayes-fics
To be snowed in with G-rated regency Benedict: Touch: Winter by yours truly
Some icy angst with a happy ending at Aubrey Hall: Thin Ice by @starryeyedstories
To see how Benedict and Sophie combat the chill: The Fireside by yours truly
But really what you need is:
Some TLC and steamy attention from modern Anthony: Chicken Soup and Oral Sex: Lord Bridgerton's Surefire Sickness Cure by @colettebronte
If you have/can recommend any other winter Bridgerton fics, please reblog and do so! Stay cozy friends! 🔥
One thing about me is I'm constantly rereading one of the Splintered books.
On a long drive? Oh I'll just pick up Unhinged.
Waiting for someone? I'll pull Splintered out from my bag.
Bored? Gimmie Ensnared.
Need to believe in love? I'll read the end of Untamed.
I'm sad? Or feel unhappy with my life/the world? I'm gonna re-read the whole series.