#rca11

“You look like shit.”

Aelin snorted, not looking up from the manuscript she was looking over. “Didn’t sleep well.”

“Yeah, you haven’t slept well all week,” Lysandra sighed, setting down a cup of coffee in front of her.

“Say your piece and move on, Lys. I need to get through this manuscript,” Aelin muttered, rubbing her brow before looking up at her best friend.

The brunette’s hands were on her hips, a delicate eyebrow raised. “You’re being stupid.”

“I’m not putting your life and Aedion’s at risk by being with him,” she grumbled. “You saw what happened to the apartment.”

“Aelin,” Lysandra groaned, grabbing her friend’s hands. “I had never seen you so happy before. Don’t ruin it because you’re scared something is going to happen to me or Aedion. We can handle ourselves.”

Aelin sighed again, a heavy, bone deep sigh. “I don’t want to talk about this right now.” She gently shook off her friend’s hands.

“Miss Galathynius.”

Aelin turned to the receptionist. “Yes Claire?”

“Um, miss…” Claire’s pale blonde eyebrows were furrowed as she looked over her shoulder and back to Aelin. “Rowan Whitethorn is here to see you and he's beginning to get impatient.”

Aelin closed her eyes, a wave of dizziness passing over her. Fucking gods.

“Send him in,” she told Claire, shooting a look at Lysandra. The brunette just shrugged and left, brushing shoulders with the silver-haired celebrity that walked into her office.

They stared at each other for a few tense moments. Rowan looked almost exactly how Aelin did. Messy hair, tired eyes, and dark circles sitting under them. Her heart twinged a bit that he was taking their breakup hard.

“What can I help you with, Mr. Whitethorn?” Aelin asked, shutting her office door and pulling down all the blinds on the windows, despite the glass being frosted.

“Don’t act like that.”

“Like what?” She only looked back to him when she was safely behind her desk again.

“Mr. Whitethorn. Like I’m some stranger,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

She pinched the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes. “What do you want, Rowan?”

“I need… a favor.”

She opened her eyes, narrowing them. “What?”

For the first time in perhaps the whole time she knew him, he looked uncomfortable.

“The Terrasen Guild Awards are this weekend, and I need a date—”

“No,” she cut him off, sitting down. “Definitely not.”

“Aelin, please,” he growled, placing his hands on her desk. “The public doesn’t know that we broke up. I can’t show up to the awards show with someone else, do you know how bad that would look?”

“That’s not my problem, Rowan,” she replied, her voice tight. “If I’m seen with you again, who knows what this psycho will do next? I can’t let them hurt me or my family or friends. Why can’t you understand that?”

“I do understand, even though you didn’t give me even the smallest chance to explain it to you,” he hissed, and she almost flinched at the hurt in his voice. “You’re not the only one that has friends and family to protect, love.”

Her eyes burned but she wouldn’t cry. Not here, not in front of him.

“Regardless, I’ve thought this through. I’ve heightened my security for the event. No one will get to you or me. Additionally, your cousin and Lysandra will have two guards from my protection detail stationed with them. One to patrol their apartment building, and one to keep eyes on the whole block. Nothing is going to happen to them.”

She stared up at him, at a loss for words.

“And…” he took a deep breath, his eyes falling to where his hands rested on the desk. “After the event, if you want me to, I’ll tell my PR assistant to put out that we’ve broken up. The world will know. You won’t have to pretend any longer.”

She blinked, her mouth falling open slightly as she took in his proposal. This man in front of her was willing to let her go if that’s what she wanted, if that’s what she chose. Her heart clenched painfully at the thought of him letting her go. Of never being with him again. But if they tried to be together again and something happened…

“Okay,” she murmured, and his head shot up to look at her. “I’ll do it.

-

It was the day of the awards show and Aelin was only slightly regretting her decision to come with Rowan.

She was at his apartment, in his room for the gods’ sakes, surrounded by a full hair, makeup, and fashion team. The team had decided to recreate her look from the day she’d met Rowan at the movie premiere. But instead of a black dress, they placed her in a silky ivory gown that offset her lasting tan from her and Rowan’s vacation in the Maldives.

She had to admit, she looked really good. And with Rowan in an all black Armani suit, he looked like a striking opposite to her that made them both stand out in their own way. Something she was nervous about. She’d never been one to like the limelight, and this would be her first event at Rowan’s side. Even if it was under false pretenses.

Her eyes wandered to him through the mirror she was placed in front of as the makeup team argued on what to do with her face. His tailor was making last minute alterations on the other side of the room. She frowned thoughtfully as she looked him over head to toe.

Being here with him, despite her nervousness about being so publicly displayed, felt right. It felt normal, like being next to him was where she was supposed to be. She still wasn’t sure if she was going to take Rowan up on his offer to publicly announce that they had broken up. She was sure it would cause a shit storm, but it was better than being scared someone might hurt her or her family for being with him.

...Right?

His eyes flicked up to meet hers in the mirror as if he could feel her gaze on him, and he gave her a small, intimate smile. A smile that he had reserved only for her. It clenched her heart and she quickly looked down at her hands folded in her lap as the makeup team finally came to a consensus.

Half an hour later, Rowan led her out of his apartment building and they quickly got into a limo before paparazzi could catch wind of them. They were silent as they drove towards the venue where the movie premiere had been.

“Just so you’re prepared…”

She looked to him, an eyebrow raised. He looked uncomfortable again.

“We have to act like we’re still together.”

Despite their situation, she smiled in amusement. “Yes, Rowan, I know.”

Taking her smile as a good sign, he sighed in relief. “I just wanted to make sure.”

She nodded and they were silent again until the limousine pulled up to the venue, celebrities and other well-known people already strolling down the red carpet. Rowan took a deep breath and then turned to her. “Are you ready?”

She nodded and he opened the door, helping her out and offering her his arm. The loud ramblings of reporters and paparazzi were at war with the shutters and clicks of cameras, but she just kept her eyes down as Rowan guided her down the carpet at a leisurely stroll.

Her and Rowan’s name were yelled from every direction and she was struggling to smile as Rowan stopped and pulled her closer. They posed for pictures, finding her smile genuine as she looked up into Rowan’s face. That smile he’d given her earlier was flirting across his lips and she couldn’t help the grin that spread across her face. Gods, he was the most handsome thing she’d ever seen.

He guided her to a reporter from Terrasen’s biggest entertainment magazine, and her heart stuttered a moment. She figured they would do an interview, but she still hadn’t prepared for one either. She gripped Rowan’s hand harder as they came to the smiling woman.

“Rowan, Aelin, it’s so good to see you two together here tonight! Aelin, that dress is divine, you look absolutely stunning. Who are you wearing?”

Did people really care about these things? “I’m wearing Armani. And so is Rowan, coincidentally.”

She could see the reporter practically swoon. “That’s adorable. So Rowan, you’re nominated for a couple of awards tonight, including Best Actor. How do you feel about it?”

Rowan answered her easily and flawlessly, throwing her a winning smile. Mala save her, her heart was soaring as she watched him field the reporter’s questions. He was in his element, born for this. She hadn’t even known he was nominated for awards tonight, but of course he would be. Even before dating him, she knew he was an amazing actor.

She tuned in just in time for the reporter to ask: “You two have caused quite the social media storm. Everyone loves you together. What’s it been like for you lovebirds?”

Aelin felt Rowan tense up underneath her touch despite that carefree smile still on his face. She could see the question had thrown him for a loop so she decided to step in before the interview accidentally ousted them.

“It’s been more than I could ever imagine,” Aelin began, squeezing Rowan’s hand in comfort this time. “I know every girl dreams of dating her celebrity crush, and for it to happen to me blows my mind every day.” She looked up to Rowan, losing herself in his green eyes, eyes she loved so much. “He’s everything I could ask for in a man. We’ve only been dating for a few months, but he would do anything for me. I can’t…” I can’t fathom losing him. She cleared her throat, blinking and turning back to the reporter. “I can’t imagine being with anyone else.”

She could feel Rowan’s eyes on her as he agreed. “Aelin surprises me every day. She’s intelligent and beautiful and funny, and she just gets me.” She looked back up at him, seeing his eyes were dark with an emotion she knew all too well, one that made her throat tighten. “I’m in awe of her, and proud of everything she does. She means the world to me.”

The reporter gushed and thanked them for the interview and they continued down the red carpet, Aelin a little zoned out as they finally made it into the venue.

Her decision has just become harder.

Sitting through such a long awards show had almost been a nightmare if not for the fact that she’d had Fenrys to joke around with between nominations. Rowan had won Best Actor, and Aelin had been so unbelievably proud of him. Which had then made the night even harder. The whole night had been otherworldly but it had felt so right to be at Rowan’s side.

Rowan had decided to skip the after party, and now they were on their way back to Rowan’s apartment. Aelin wrung her hands the whole time, unsure of what to say or do now that they were alone and didn’t have to act for the cameras. She found herself following him up to his penthouse.

“You can spend the night if you want,” Rowan said hesitantly, tugging off his tie as they stepped into the apartment. “I have the guest bedroom.”

“I… um… okay,” she breathed, staring at the floor.

And that was that. Rowan showed her the guest bedroom and bid her goodnight. She sighed, kicking off her shoes and unzipping her dress, letting it fall into a heap on the floor. Her bag from earlier was in here, and she yanked out the robe she’d been wearing before she’d gotten dressed, wrapping it around her as she stared at the bed. Knowing that Rowan was just down the hall.

“Fuck,” she muttered, turning and padding down the hall to his room, pushing open his door silently.

He was out on his balcony, the glare of the city lights faintly illuminating his bedroom. He was in sweatpants, shirtless as he leaned against the balcony rail, his back to her. She pushed open the sliding door, alerting him to her presence and stepped up behind him, pressing herself against his back as her arms came around him. They were silent as a slight breeze blew around them, Aelin’s cheeked resting against his warm skin, her hands flat against his broad chest. His stance had relaxed slightly at the feel of her hands.

“Thank you for tonight,” Rowan murmured.

She nodded in reply, pausing before placing a soft kiss to his back. He tensed again, turning in her arms.

“Aelin…” he trailed off uncertainly.

She shook her head. “I know.”

Whatever reservations he might have had seconds ago vanished as his lips captured hers. He gathered her up in his arms and carried her back into his room, where their hands barely left each other the whole night.

Tomorrow. She’d deal with it tomorrow.