#raphael amell

I knew I would see Jowan again.

And I should have killed him the moment I'd seen him, but I wanted him to suffer for his crimes. Frightened about the moment when undead soldiers would open his cell door and tear him from limb to limb. Never knowing when his breath would be his last.

He tried to evoke the word friendship in my face again, and it took all the power in my Maker-given body to not spit the word right back in his face. He asks about Lily, but I give him no answer, for he deserves none. Jowan may play the "I'm trying to do right" game, but he chooses to poison the Arl in the name of Loghain, and for what, so that the Circle will allow him to be free? He should have known he would be abandoned, just as he abandoned those who cared about him.

But as far as I'm concerned, Jowan will suffer and will continue to suffer as long as Connor is still possessed.

Thankfully, Arl Eamon is still alive. However, he's possibly being kept alive by a demon tends to complicate things. 

I understand what Isolde was trying to do, noble families don't recover from having a mage child. I should know, the Amells were practically second in line to be Viscount before my mother Revka gave birth to me. Kirkwall is considerably pious in my opinion, and having a possible magi relative to the Viscount is a no-no in the eyes of their Chantry and Templars. 

But she was wrong in the way she did it. While there are many good apostates with good intentions, there are apostates that are who they are because they are malificarum. And unfortunately, she, along with Redcliffe has learned the hard way what happens when you try to keep secrets: they can get people killed.

(How this got stuck in the back of my journal, I'll never know.)

If there was ever a poster showing what would happen if we failed to stop the Blight, Lothering would be the pretty picture on it. I did as much as I could to try and help those still there, but I know it may never be enough. Their lord is gone, a casualty of Ostagar, and they know that time for them is slowly running out before the darkspawn come on to their doorstep. In some cases, they're already there.

The hopelessness and rising tension is thick in the atmosphere. Everyone frightened, turning to the Chantry for shelter and protection, perhaps only knowing that there's little to give. The rarely seen Chasind are even here, but they are turned away as scoundrels and thieves; met a poor fellow who watched his wife being dragged away by a couple of darkspawn, and the only way he could unleash his anguish was to yell and warn everyone that was around him.

We've returned from the Brecilian Forest with a representative from the Dalish in tow. 

Can I just say that I never want to see another werewolf again for as long as I live. That's what was happening in the forest, a group of werewolves had attacked the tribe and their Keeper, Zathrian, had asked for my help in killing the reason of the curse, Witherfang, and taking his heart. 

Only to find out after countless werewolf attacks, shade ambushes, and nearly getting killed about two or three times, the curse itself was linked back to Zathrian. Zathrian had used blood magic to bind the spirit of the forest to the great wolf Witherfang, two sides of a blighted coin. As much as I don't like to dilly-dally, We need at least a day's rest to fully recover from the ordeal.

I had my first nightmare tonight, at least, Alistair said it would be my first. 

Bodahn and his son, Sandal have decided to follow us. Perhaps in Duncan's eyes it may not be the smartest move, but should this Blight get any worse, it'll be a godsend should any town's supply chains get cut off from the coming horde. That and Sandal's enchantments are quite extraordinary; no wonder the Tranquil called the boy a 'savant'.

We've decided to head into the Brecilian Forest to find the Dalish. With any luck, we'll find them just outside the forest entrance. With our luck, they'll end up right in the middle of the forest.

Instant Demeanor: Cold, Silent, Frightening

Training: Warrior

Weapon: Two-Handed Weapon

Comments:

Emotionally cold and frequently recites the Qun (which can either be quite fascinating or irritating if you've woken up in the middle of the night after consuming a whole bottle of whiskey; I can thank Bodahn and myself for that). Fact that he killed a family in cold blood is unnerving in so many ways. 

Overall:

Let him play with Pongo and deal with the others, answer questions when he asks and leave him be.

(Note: Bodahn says that Sten likes to look at some of the paintings he carries.)