#raph is soft

It took Raphael two years to finally decide to walk on a sidewalk alone. It was the first time he was alone in... Well, Michelangelo called it “upstairs”, Leonardo called it “the real world” and Donatello just called the streets of New York by their common name. Raph didn’t called it anything since names carry meaning and that world and its residents were a mystery to him. When he had to describe the world above him, he called it “outside”.

He was 19 when he was outvoted and then convinced of accepting the idea of coming out into the world. Now a grown 21 years old man-turtle, he still felt his palms sweaty and his fingers cold as he held the knob of the door that led into the streets of New York. A shaky breath left his mouth when he finally opened the alley door.

It wasn’t the first time he walked among humans but in every occasion he had to (knowing he would only do it if he was obligated) he had Casey holding one of his shoulders or April holding one of his fingers. Now, the world presented itself in front of him and he was alone. Despite his anxiety, the landscape wasn’t as intimidating as he once anticipated, there was no big crowd filled with scared looks of disgust, only the concrete street and light rain drops. He didn’t know exactly what he expected, actually. It was too late in the night to be walking the street alone, no human would dare to bet their safety to wander around an ugly and stinky street. Raphael wasn’t human and he would bet his life knowing no one ill intended would dare to cross his path... No one would even dare to ask for directions or to wish him a good evening. No one would dare to approach him. He had learned sooner than later that even well meaning humans would avoid being alone next to him and despite his efforts to understand them there was a deep part of Raph that held a grudge against it.

The second oldest brother would rather spend the rest of his life avoiding contact with this reality. It took maybe two or three minutes after he started to walk down the street for him to regret that decision as he felt the warm thick air of the night against his skin. He kept his pace despite that, determined to reach at least one mile before coming back home. The streets were still empty and he could only hear his heavy steps on the ground and the distant sound of cars. There was a time he loved this city... A time when all he wanted to was to roam around hidden in the roof tops and the dark shadows of the alleys, a time when he could watch this world and not be a part of it, when he could be invisible, a mere observer. Maybe he still could, he thought, maybe his outfit made him look human enough from a distance... Raphael liked the clothes, he liked he was now able to hear Knicks' shirts that fitted him perfectly thanks to his new access to tailor-made clothing, he liked his loose trousers and the dark colored sweaters that covered his shell, he liked his sneakers and his watch. Life out on the surface had brought him many new luxuries: now the lair had tiles and furniture and a long corridor that led to a door facing the streets, it didn't smell bad anymore thanks to modern isolation and he had his own bed, a king sized bed, with many pillows and clean white bed sheets. Raph sighed loudly once again, maybe Mikey was right. Maybe life could be more than he perceived to be.

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"Turn it on!"

The crowd cheered lively as the host turned in his chair.

"Good night, ladies and gentleman." He started talking in a pleasant voice "Tonight, in a exclusive interview... An absolutely unique moment in history. It's an honor to be here, sharing this moment with you as we receive with a warm round of applause please welcome... Michelangelo Hamato!"

Mikey walked into the stage with the biggest smile as the applause kept going, he was wearing a well fitted set of blazer and pants and he looked nothing like the wild and anxious brother they new. He waved to the crowd with such confidence that the absurd size difference between him and the host looked funny instead of terrifying, he even flipped the edge of his blazer behind him as he seated in the two-seater sofa and crossed his leg, showing a shinny elegant shoe.

"Michelangelo.... May I call you Mikey?"

"Yes, please."

"It's an honor... and I mean it, it's an honor to have you tonight."

"The honor is all mine, Jim."

The crowd cheered once again.

"Now... Mikey, I've to start saying... You're a sight to be seen!"

"Thank you!" Loud claps echoing from the crowd.

"How tall are you?"

"I'am 6'5"

"Taller than Micheal Jordan!"

"... And the smallest in the bunch!" Mikey commented with a big smile and the host returned the smile with wide eyes.

"Must be a very tall bunch!"

"A very big bunch!"

"Yes indeed!" The crowd laughed along with the host as Mikey shared a wide smile again.

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Ten minutes had passed since Raphael started his walk and three minutes had passed since a man with a dog on a leash had walked past him, completely unbothered by his presence. Had he made it? Has he invisible? Comfortable enough with the prospect of an empty city that slept while he walked, Raph took his headphones and pressed play in the link Donnie had sent him, the cellphone opened a new tab and a podcast started playing. Soothing was followed by a female voice that introduced the name of the show.

"...As always, thank you all for listening. In today's episode we'll be discussing the new revelations in the law case that wrecked the nation: the case Sacks vs Hamato, that absurd demonstration of pure capitalist greed that tried to condemn four literal teenagers to pay an equally absurd amount of money - and prison time!- for materials damage caused to the Sacks company-" "...and illegal espionage." A second voice complemented "Yes, thank you Sabrina. We have already discussed the legal implications that case could open for the judicial system here in America and all the possible outcomes in the Thirteenth episode of the first season of this podcast, if you haven't heard it yet, I heavily suggest you do so you can follow the argument of the developments in this case. Now, Sabrina... Yesterday we saw the final outcome of this case and the hearing that decided the sentence ended with an incredible emotional speech from Donatello - we know he was one of the brother's more involved with the whole process" "Yes" "... And now they're free! Of all charges!" "...Yes Gabi what we saw today followed by Michelangelo's incredible interview in the Late Night Show back on Thursday was, honestly, a beautiful strike against bigotry in this country..." "Absolutely, I mean... The judge of the case himself assumed that the charges were unfounded and biased..." "Yes! And now we have a established background to be able to-"

Raphael stopped the audio, unable to disguise his contempt. Geez , is that the kind of thing Donnie spends his time listening to? Wasn't real life already a bore? He let out a grumpy sigh and put his phone away. A human figure across the street started to stare indiscreetly at him and Raphael felt his heart shrink before making a blunt turn in a different street. The rain had stopped and the night wind was starting to feel colder, just like Raphael's heart as he tried to escape whoever it was that was trying to identify his figure.

A bright blue light appeared at the end of the new street Raphael just walked into. An all-night convenience store. Raph had been in a place that before, he and Casey had brought snacks and a couple of beers. He felt his mouth water at the idea of a cold beer. He had cash - more than enough. Maybe if he promised a fat tip they would let him get in. He shift his height between his feet as he observed the inside, the neon blue light was coming from a weirdly shaped advertisement placed above the entrance, perfectly contrasting with the ugly green light inside the store, some shelves appeared through the glass window and door, but he could tell that the place was empty - or almost that. In his head, Raphael had decided to take that chance and he was determined to perceive, his body, otherwise, didn't seem as thrilled with the idea. He waited outside as the rain started to pour once again, trying collect the mental strength to got in when a skinny old man opened the translucent door

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"Mikey, your last name is now worldwide known since the start of the trial, tell me: is it Japanese? Was it inherited from you father...?"

"I don't know, actually... We made it up!"

"What?" The human man asked as the crowd giggled

"It's exactly that, actually. When we came to the surface and Sacks decides to sue us the judicial system needed a surname to use... Apparently!"

"So you just made it up!"

"Hell yeah! Wouldn't you like to come up with your name?"

"Yes, absolutely."

"What would you call yourself?" He host made a surprise expression as Mikey changed the dynamic

"Jim Linotax!"

"...Oh, it's a pleasure, Mr. Linotax!" Michelangelo said, offering a handshake as he managed to pull more laughs from the crowd

"Michelangelo... It's a unique name!"

"I heard once it was very popular in the sixteen century."

"Oh, really?"

"Oh yes."

"And all your brothers have renascence names, is that right?"

"Yes. Thanks to old dad."

"How 's that?"

"Well, you see, when you grow up in a tiny sewer house you have more concerns than you weirdly specific name..."

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"Are you gonna steal?" The tiny man asked and he seemed to fight the same nervousness as Raph. The turtle-man on the other hand, felt all his limbs stiff and his hands go numb at the sound of that old man directing calling to him. He made a genuine effort and reached his pockets for the dollar bills.

"I-I just want a couple of beers."

"Go AWAY! Go away! No beers here for you!" The man started to yell as Raphael finally caught up his accent. It was stiff and hard in the h's and o's, he couldn't decipher where it was from.

"I just want to buy something! I am a client!" Raphael responded too late to recognize his anger.

"Nothing here for you! Go away!"

"I HAVE THE MONEY!" Raph screamed back at him, waving the bills in the air. The world started to feel out of focus as he realized people had gone to their apartment balconies and were looking at him through the windows in the buildings surrounding the store. Had he woke the whole street? Did he hear someone saying they were calling the police? No, please... The last thing he needed was a scold from Leo for causing a scene... All he wanted was a beer. Fuck, fuck, fuck. More and more lights started to turn on as the buzz around him got bigger and louder. He felt his heart sink and his hand hurt from the tight firsts he could not undo. Something inside him couldn't decide between the want to murder that man and the uncontrollable desire to scream and shout. "No more roof climbing." Leo had said "We're like humans now. We can't just go out jumping through people's houses." He couldn't just vanish away, despite the burning desire to just escape that situation.

"Look," Raphael managed to say, after two or three deep breaths "... I am sorry. I just wanted to buy a beer... I am leaving now."

"Hey! I finally found you!" An unfamiliar voice shouted from the other side of the street. Raph turned to look and almost knocked over whoever it was. Their bodies bumped into each other but only the smaller of them reacted to the impact, he felt a tiny pair of hands grab his arm."OooOOooww! That was close... Hey, we've been looking for you! Did you get the drinks?"

"NO DRINKS HERE FOR YOU!" The store owner screamed once again.

"Damn... Ok. We can go somewhere else!" The female voice had a sharpness to it, finally Raphael finally looked at her.

Nothing in this world could have prepared him for the vision of the young women holding his arm. She was short (but most people usually are in comparison to the mutant), had a luscious curly hair, tied in two pigtails that ended in the back of her neck. She was wearing a very revealing blouse and high waisted pants that matched in color. She was clearly dressed up, with sparkly high heels and long elegant earrings and she was holding his arms with a casualty he had never experienced before.

"C'mon!" She said and turned her head to him, showing a full face of makeup and bright brown eyes "Let's get the hell out of here."

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The crowd followed Mikey and the host as they laughed at the childhood story the turtle just shared.

"Mikey, unfortunately our time is almost over... I just wanted to thank you once again for coming tonight, for coming out into the world."

"The pleasure is all mine Jim, really... I've spent all my teenage years watching you on TV... I never thought I would be here tonight, I never thought I'd have the pleasure of meeting such a welcoming audience (loud cheering noises) and I never thought I could be part of this world."

There was an almost child-like honesty in his words making the brief moment of silence that came after especially touching.

"He's killing it." - April whispered to the TV

"100%" - Leo's voice came after

"Thank you, Michelangelo... I hope we can have all your brothers soon!"

"You can count on it!" Mikey answered, excited

"You can NOT count on that" - Raphael responded at the TV

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"I thought you guys didn't walk the streets... I've red the interview your brother gave to the New Yorker... He said you probably would wait a while until you decided to stroll around." The woman said as they walked back to the lair's alley door. She had told Raphael her name was Clara and they had held hands until they turned the corner and were out of sight from those judging eyes. She was smaller than most humans, Raphael later realized, maybe 5'1 or 5'2 and had a high pitched voice that made the turtle think about those weird anime dubs he used to watch as a kid. The strangest thing about his savior was that she seemed strangely familiarized with his presence. He ignored her comment as they kept walking in silence for a while. Raphael couldn't stop thinking about how long it would take for him to finally reach his destination and how could he respectfully ask for her to back off. Not that he wasn't grateful but her presence alone made him incredibly uncomfortable. She was too small, too elegant, too beautiful to walk just like that, beside him.

"I guess it is equally strange to you, right? To be here, in the real world... Out and about." Clara walked casually with both hands in her pocket as she looked up to the streets lights, Raphael wondered if she actually expected him to answer "... Is it weird for me to be like this? I mean... I thought you could use some help back there. But I don't mean to be inconvenient... Is it ok if you just walk with me closer to the next bus station? It is a bit late and I guess you're the perfect body guard..."

They kept walking, Clara and her tiny hands in the neon green pockets of her pants and Raphael with his stiff steps and dark clothing, all he wanted was to walk home without meeting everyone else, lock the door behind him and drink until all the memories fade away... But it didn't seem his wishes would come true as a pair of men jogging appeared at the end of the street, just in front of them. They looked at the strange couple and one of them startled at the vision. Clara looked at them and waved.

"Good night to you!" She said with a calm tone.

"Are you alright??" One of them asked from far away, still trying to figure out Raphael's image.

"Yeah!" She answered immediately "Why wouldn't I be?" Then she gave them a wide welcoming smile that made Raphael's heart beat uncontrollably "Good night to you." Clara then said, just as she turned one corner, grabbing Raphael's arm.

She then let go of him and offered a warm smile "It's ok... I don't think they will bother you. The bus stop is just right there turning the other corner... Thank you for bringing me here. Good night!" And just like that, she turned her back to him and started to walk away. Each step pressing Raphael's heart against his chest.

"WAIT!" The worlds came out of his mouth before he could stop them. She startled at the unexpected sound and immediately turned to him

"What?"

Raphael waited a minute so he could gather all the emotional strength to ask: "Can you walk me home?"

Clara smiled as she approached the mutant once again: "Is it too far?"

Raph took a minute to answer but instead said: "I'll pay you a cab when we get there." Clara hums and adds:" You sure? I leave pretty far." Raphael only nodded. Then she gave him the same silence answer. He couldn't mentally trace the path he had taken that night but he knew it was almost morning. The rain had stopped long ago but the air was much colder than when he left the lair, he was actually getting cold and wondered if she felt the same. They kept walking in silence until it finally hit him:

"What were you doing in the streets so late at night?"

"Oh..." She seemed surprised by his question, her voice a comparison that made him realize how low he sounded "I was on a date actually..." She said showing her teeth in a straight smile that indicated self-awareness, well that explained the clothing. "The guy turned out to be a prick, so I bolted! I was completely lost when I heard all the fuss the store guy was making... Thank god I found that mess, actually... I was getting pretty scared."

Silence as they got closer and closer to the lair's street door.

"... It was a complete coincidence to find you, actually... I was watching the rerun of your brother's interview today... I am actually in love with him! "she said in a ambiguous tone "Can you introduce us? Do you think I have a chance?" Raph finally laughed. Not at the idea that Mikey was charming enough to acquire the interest a woman like Clara, but at the absurd fact she thought she had to ask if she had a chance. With Mikey?

"He's also a prick." Raphael responded sharply but with a captivating tone to his voice. Then... She laughed. Raph couldn't contain his own grin.

The first sunbeams were about to appear at the horizon and when the red-wearing turtle finally reached the large metal door, he felt a relief like never before.

"I'll call a cab and get inside… So you know… The guy doesn’t bail because of me."

"Ok." Clara said, a light smile in her cheeks. "It was nice to meet you..."

"Raphael." He added after realizing she never asked his name did she knew it already?

"Hope to see you around soon."