#rantaro angst

◊ Every single plushy you gift to him, he cherishes. He loves you a lot, so obtaining a plushy that was made by you kind of makes him feel as if you gave him a token of your love. So he’d thank you by kissing your face all over, uttering words of gratitude.  

◊ He had been searching for you, and so when he found you he nearly cried out in joy. He found you cuddled up and fast asleep with one of your almost finished plushies. He wouldn’t want to wake you up, but he just needed to cuddle you and make sure to tell you how much he loves you. After snapping a few photos, of course. He’d make you his lock screen. 

◊ “Hey, baby…” Putting his phone down on your work table, he would murmur into your ear, leant down to your level and near your face. Seeing your face close-up made him kiss your cheeks subconsciously, which made you stir awake. You sneakily peaked at Rantaro’s face love-sick with one of your eyes, closing both of them once again to fall back asleep. “Are you awake?” You nodded your head against your plush pillow, nuzzling the side of your face further in it. 

◊ “... You gonna get up?” He snorted at how adorable you were, silently ‘aw’ing underneath his breath. Shaking your head, “mm waiting for more kisses.” You mumbled, sleep laced in your voice. Your hearing intensified due to how sleepy you were, so you could hear his shirt shuffling as he reached down to pet your hair. The voice of your beloved sounding rough as he laughed, it made you smile in your half-asleep state. 

◊ Giving you what you wanted so much, he pecked your eyelids, cheeks, nose and forehead before pressing a small but loving kiss to your lips. Lingering for a moment and grinning as he felt you slightly pucker your lips to kiss him back. Pulling away, he saw your once closed eyes, half-open and staring at him with confusion, as if saying, “Why’d you stop?” 

◊ “You’re so sneaky,” He quietly giggled, responding to your grabby hands by carefully gripping each side of your hips and lifting you up to press against him. The plushy was held between the two of yours’ chest, feeling squished and soft against both of you. “I love it.” He nuzzled his nose against yours, smiling wide at your flustered reaction. 

◊ Loves opening up his phone just to see a picture of you being so fucking adorable. He would end up forgetting why he opened his phone and instead left it to find and hug you.

◊ Though he adores seeing your little face all squished up to your soft plushies, he gets jealous that that wasn’t him. Yes, he’s jealous of a small plushy. He really prefers you cuddle him instead of the plushy, although he wouldn’t mind holding you and the plushies close.

◊ He likes surprising you whilst you make a plushy, back hugging you and hearing you squeak at his sudden touch. He doesn’t like, however, if you work on a plushy for too long and end up losing track of time, forgetting to eat or even leave your workstation.

◊ He’d scold you but if you showed him your plushy, he’d go soft. “You should’ve at least set a timer-” You whipped out your plushy from behind your back, presenting it in front of his face, his once, somewhat stern eyes were now watering slightly, a look of pure adoration in them.“... S/o, you can’t do that.” 

◊ Nonetheless, he still wouldn’t inform you of the things he did for you, making himself believe that it was better for him to be selfless. He didn’t think you needed to know that the things happening to you were Rantaro’s doing, for it was better to watch the shocked and ecstatic expression on your face from a distance. You don’t need to know, it’ll be like… his little secret!

◊ Even though Rantaro would be willing to go terrifyingly far for you, he would never do anything remotely sexual or filthy to the thought of you. He would never steal any undergarments or take any lewd pictures of you, he respects you too much.

◊ In front all of these terrifying things, Rantaro is a sweetheart. He gets bashful over small compliments you’d give him, he’d go out on dates with you, pay for food, laugh with you; ultimately, act like a normal human being with you. 

◊ But once you leave to go back home, as it was getting late, he feels his heart start to decay, and that dark and disturbing need for you, anything, just you! -Comes back. 

◊ During conversations with Rantaro, he would be very discreet with things he says. When he’s feeling especially brave, or feeling like he needs you to know of how far he’d go for you; he would slip in something dark, something that would make you double-take. He’d say it in such a dark tone, a tone you’ve never heard before, and that expression on his face just scares you. 

◊ You brush it off as him having his resting bitch-face, but you know it’s deeper than that. You just don’t want to believe it, your sweet boyfriend Rantaro who acts like a gentleman for you, the perfect guy who treats you right- You didn’t want to destroy that illusion of him by seeing the truth. 

◊ And so you deny it.

◊ You’re too scared of breaking up with him, as you know of his violent behaviour, and so you stick with him. You try not to think about how long, as a result of you having a breakdown about it a few weeks earlier.

◊ If he ever saw you with another man, or another man hitting on you, he’d be scarily silent. He wouldn’t say anything, but when you come back, he immediately grabs your hand. Not gently, not like he usually does, no, his fingernails dig into your palms, and you’re sure he’s near cutting skin.

◊ But you don’t say anything, you’re too scared to. 

◊ Rantaro’s actions have terrified you to the point where he doesn’t even need to worry or threaten you not to leave him, you’ve already decided you value your life, and so you stay. You stay even though it hurts, you stay because who knows what he’ll do if you leave.

◊ You start to become a lifeless shell of a person, always smiling to satisfy your other, and forgetting who you were before Rantaro.

◊ He’s delusional, even if you tried to reason with him to stop this insane shit he was pulling, he wouldn’t even listen. He wouldn’t believe it was wrong, he would insist you were wrong, that you were viewing his actions for something that no one else saw but you.

◊ You wouldn’t even be able to argue back, as the look in his face scared you shitless. You couldn’t even mutter out a single word, afraid you might fall apart from it.

◊ Even if you clearly show the look of distress on your face in front of Rantaro, he convinces himself that you aren’t scared, that you’re just overwhelmed from how much he loves you. He’s sure of it. He’s a good boyfriend, isn’t he?

◊ Rantaro appears friendly and kind to everyone around him, for he is known for that. But behind closed doors, he’s the complete opposite with anyone who dares to mess with you. He will show no mercy; when he has his mind set on something, he won’t stop. So once he decides he will kill you, there is no escaping; you will die.