#randomwritingprompt

Then why can I still think?

Why can I still experience…. Anything? Isn’t death supposed to be the end. Capital T; capital E.

THE END

I let my mind wonder. Where am I? Who am I? Is this the afterlife? I can only perceive darkness - rather blackness. It’s as if someone or something had placed me in mother. Nothing to see; nothing to hear; nothing to taste, touch or smell, and yet here I was… existing.

Do I still have a body?

I tentatively try to direct my thoughts.

Move. Move anything. An arm. A leg. A phalange. An eyelid….

I felt a twitch. My eyelid was twitching on command…. MY EYELID WAS TWITCHING ON COMMAND.

Suddenly everything changed from being surrounded by nothingness to being surrounded by harsh white light.

Does that mean I’m in heaven?

Just as my chest fluttered, the image adjusted. I was not surrounded by white light walking towards some pearly gates. In fact, I was in a room. An average room with pale pink walls and a bright, white ceiling. All I could make out was that I was surrounded by unicorns and princesses.

I felt the panic bubble up my throat. I’m not in heaven…. I’m in my own personal HELL. I really fucked up. I can’t believe all that bullshit was true. I thought at least it would be the fire and brimstone hell, not a personalized down to the T hell. I just -

“There you are,” a small voice said. “Ms. Annie, I was looking for you.”

First of all, who is this person? Where is that voice coming from? And my name is not ANNIE…. At least it wasn’t.

I spun around to see a pair of big, beautiful, blue eyes looking right at me. This little girl, no more than five, was smiling at me.

There’s no way that she can see me, right? She just happens to be talking and looking in my direction. Right?

Oh, poor naive young me, Forget everything you think you know. I realize you think the choices you're making right now are finally allowing you to live, but trust me when I tell you that you are sorely mistaken. They're holding you back so much more than you think. The guy you think is "the one," who will be your first everything? Not only will he rip your heart out and punch it harder than the time he'll punch your face into a window (brace yourself, sweetie,) he'll ruin the tight-knit relationship you have with your closest friends and family. He may be introducing you to a lot of new things and people, but none of those things or people will ever do you any good. All the rebelling you think you're doing, all the drugs and the parties and the distance you're putting between you and your family, it's all going to blow up in your face. I know that words from anyone, not even your future self, will mean anything to you at the stage you're in right now. I can't make you walk away from the mistakes you're going to make and all of the potentially disastrous and deadly situations you're going to put yourself through. I could save us both a lot of trouble if that was possible. Just know that you'll learn from it all one day. You'll wish you did a lot of things differently, and you'll know exactly where it all started to go wrong. No matter how many nights you spend wishing you could just cease to exist, just know that it will get better. Much, much better. Maybe you have to make those mistakes to fully appreciate everything you'll be blessed with years down the line. Who knows. Your time to be happy will come, though. I promise you that. Just be patient; good things come to those who wait. Love from,