#raegrets

Normally Raeger would make food for his own enjoyment but today was...different. 

He had noticed a certain someone hadn’t been coming to class recently. He just shrugged it off and thought it was because that was something she would do and was probably in one of her hiding spots. That was after the first day she was gone. After a few more? He began to get worried, to say the least. Was she sick or something? She was running through his mind and almost it was as if the teacher could read his mind, had provided some closure. She wasn’t sick, no. 

She was gone.

Raeger felt his heart drop. No, this had to be some bad dream. The more he thought about it, the more he thought maybe he was just being ridiculous. They were...friends? More than friends? Fuck, he didn’t know. He did know that he had to have felt some type of way about this girl. “Friends” don’t look at each other that way. 

It was toxic, really. He knew the more he overthought things, the worse he would feel. And cooking didn’t help, at least not when he was making paninis. These sandwiches became a comfort food for them. Them. 

There he sat in his dorm alone, eating paninis and listening to a mixtape she made for him on ye olde walkman. All he could think was how great would it be if she were here on his bed listening to music and eating paninis. For now, he just stared at the ceiling while the music tuned out everything.

I went to the eye doctor's late this afternoon and, as part of my exam, they dilated my pupils.* It was only when I got all the way back to my apartment that I realized that I could have been scaring the shit out of people on the street as I walked home by staring at them from under the eery orange glow of the street lights like some sort of movie monster with soulless black eyes.