#quebecois

Phone call (pt. 5/6)

Something something glasshouses.

Previous strips: PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4

More Tiff & Eve: My Site| Webtoon

Mini update on La Corriveau.

The French Canadian Iron Widow is out from Lux & Nox! They come signed!

when we're mad we'll say Tabarnak!

when we're hungry we'll eat Tourtière

Starting at 0:48 - 1:18

Montreal, My Beautiful (Montréal, ma belle, dir. Xiaodan He) x WIFF 2026.

Screen legend Joan Chen stars as a Chinese immigrant mother living in the titular French-Canadian metropolitan city who engages in a steamy same-sex affair later in life with a vibrant, young Québécoise woman (Charlotte Aubin). This puts her traditional family situation in turmoil while she enjoys her newfound menopausal sexual freedom. She struggles to juggle her marital and parental responsibilities with the carefree romantic yearning of new love. Director He builds a complex portrait of womanhood that balances strong Eastern culture with familiar Western ideals fluidly.

Winner of the Best Canadian Film prize at the 2026 Windsor International Film Festival.

Hey so I’ve read a bunch of hollanov fic where Shane speaks French, and as a Montrealer I just wanted to share some tips and tricks! I’m a bilingual English-French speaker and can understand and speak Quebecois French. That’s what this primer is going to focus on :)

First: using Google translate will only sort of help. Quebecois is an antiquated version of French and is its own dialect, meaning that anything you put into Google will come out sounding… not right for a queb speaker.

Next: Quebecois often uses English words, just said with the queb accent (which is pretty twangy). “Fuck,” for example, is not uncommon to hear in casual conversation.

And: Quebecois is still kind of seen as a “hick” form of French among the middle and upper classes in Montreal. Part of this is how informal it is/sounds and the truly insane amount of contractions. For example: je suis (I am) in becomes j’shuis (spelled j’suis) in Queb French. Still means I am, but the pronunciation is very different. Shane would likely be speaking Quebecois French for a couple reasons: he would have learned regular/neutral French in school in Ontario (but learning French outside of Quebec in school is pretty much a joke in most of the rest of Canada). However, Shane would’ve likely spent a ton of time around Quebecois kids playing hockey. That’s where he would’ve gotten most of his French, and he likely can modulate between Queb French and more Neutral French for interviews.

Finally, let’s go through a very basic glossary of words I think might be useful for fic writers:

SWEARING

Quebecois swears are mostly literal objects or religious words used in the Catholic Church. There was a whole falling out between the church and the Quebecois people and now the swearing is choice and very fluid and vibes-based; this is a great clip (from Bon Cop Bad Cop, a movie Jacob Tierney’s dad did!) that really kind of lays the ground work for understanding Quebecois swearing and to hear the accent. Just make sure subtitles/cc are on!

Calisse (caw-leess): literally a chalice. Vibes based, could mean damn, shit, fuck but worse, can be a verb, adjective, and/or noun [je m’en calisse = i don’t give a fuck]

Tabarnak (ta-bahr-nak): literally tabernacle. Vibes-based, could mean, damn, shit, fuck but even worse, can be a verb, adjective, and/or noun [criss de fuck de tabarnak = a line of really intense swearing! Whatever the fuck happened was baaaaaad]

Ostie: literally I think this is the host? Or maybe communion? I dunno haha. Vibes-based, usually used to pile on and really emphasize swearing [ostie de pourri sale = reallyyyyy fucking dirty/gross/rotten/disgusting/bad]

Criss (kreess): Christ [je m’en crisser une = I’m gonna fucking give you one]

Marde (mard): Shit [mange la fucking marde bro = eat fucking shit dude]

Fuck

TERMS OF ENDEARMENT

Mon chum: my boyfriend - usually a longterm partner, but can technically also be a very very very good friend. Because of all the church stuff many people from Quebec don’t actually get married; they have longterm civil partnerships. Mon chum, is what you’d call a male partner

Ma blonde: my girlfriend - same as above but for a woman. PLEASE do not call refer to either Ilya as “ma blonde.” Firstly, the gender conjugation doesn’t work, second the only way I can see that being used in a way that isn’t a slur for a gay man is for a gay man that is incredibly effeminate or flamboyant, which… yeah, maybe just don’t do it?

Mon pitou: my little puppy. Very cute, can be used for romantic partners, friends, kids

Mon chou: my cabbage/pastry. Not so much for friends, mostly for romantic partners and young kids

Minou: little cat. My grandma calls me this, but she also would refer to my grandfather as minou so it works for both!

Chéri: dear/darling. This is the most used term of endearment by far and so I think is the most in character? And the most appropriate.

Bébé: baby

Mon amour: my love, kind of formal for me? But you can def use it.

And of course you can string words together, which I think is another phenomenal option for them: “Criss t’es beau” = Christ you’re beautiful/gorgeous.

Also very good to know “c’est plat = it’s boring” or “t’es (tellement) plat = you’re so boring” for, you know, reasons.

Languages are complicated and I’m only one person - and am crucially not Quebecois, I come from immigrant anglos - but yeah. Hopefully this helps a little? And I’m super happy to help with French in fic wherever I can.