#pwud

i feel like I often see such a vehemently negative reaction to disabled drug users that is based on the idea that everything that disabled people do in their lives has to be focused on treating/curing/eradicating our disabilities. and that if we do shit that isn't "healthy" it's somehow morally worse then if an ablebodied person was doing those same things. and i've met so many people who seem to be incredibly surprised by the idea that disabled people might use drugs for many of the same reasons abled people use drugs (bc it feels good, bc we're at a party and it's fun, bc it meets a need, bc it helps with pain, etc etc etc etc) and i think there's a lot tied up there with the concept of "dignity of risk" and the importance of fighting for disabled people to be able to take risks and make risky decisions in our own lives. and how uncomfortable abled people are with disabled people who are living imperfect, risky, complicated lives.

i also notice this strange dynamic where people who want to seem chill with drug use but who actually still have a lot of unlearned propaganda often justify their reactions with the narrative that all drug use is "self-medication." which i think really reflects a lot again about the prevalence of the ideology of cure--that drug use is considered less morally bad when people can justify it as being a "treatment" for (often vaguely defined) medicalized concepts of disability.

and i truly do not give a fuck about how disabled drug users talk about their own drug use, but I do give a fuck about people creating a hierarchy of drug users where some people are considered more worthy of respect than others. and i always feel deeply wary about increased medicalization as a proposed solution for anything, even when suggested as a temporarily pragmatic strategy.

I realize he was in the thick of it. He knew that there were other people affected. Those people were a part of his community.

So much media portrayed AIDS (as it was called at the time) as purely a "gay virus" ignoring the massive amount of drug users who also contracted it.

Queer people and people who use drugs are deeply intersected in so many ways.

But sometimes i think we forget, that it wasn't just queer people. It was people who use drugs as well. Some of those people, weren't queer and they didn't matter to the world either.

If you're queer and you actively hate people who use drugs, you've lost solidarity with people who have suffered alongside you for decades.

Fortunately in Aotearoa, we are lucky enough to have free, legal, and confidential drug checking services. Drug checking is a service where you can take your drugs for them to be checked by a professional using an FTIR spectrometer, reagents, and fentanyl, nitazene and benzodiazepine test strips. These tools can help you find out what's in your drugs. You can also have a conversation with the drug checker about how you can be safer with your drug use.

Drug checking is unfortunately, just a band-aid solution, drug harm will always be high as long as drugs are illegal and unregulated. I'm proud to be a part of this much needed band-aid.

You can find the times, dates, and locations of all drug checking clinics in Aotearoa/New Zealand at thelevel.org.nz/drug-checking-clinics

Stay safe, have fun, and remember

i went to my local harm reduction nonprofit today and they gave me SO much supplies.

but they gave me something even more incredible....

they said they are looking to pay us at the Outpost to distribute their supplies for them. we would make the harm reduction kits i planned with materials that they supply, and then distribute them in my community!

as of now, i have 5 full kits made!!

my collective will soon be collaborating with a huge local healthcare clinic in my region.

this feels like a dream.

polaroid of me grinning because i suddenly know how glad i am to be alive

my first OD.

but we had a safety plan - staggered shots, naloxone on hand - and it saved me. she saved me. i fucking love harm reduction.