I had grand plans to Come Out ™ by asking this known lesbian to prom and so everyone would be like “whoooooooooa SHE’S a lesbian? also she looks SO GOOD?” & it would be this big Declaration of being a legal adult. I was obviously a very melodramatic teen, and I think if I had gone with her it would have been a let down both reaction wise and having-to-hang-out-with-her-all-night-panicking-about-Being-On-A-Date-Wrong wise, so it’s probably for the best that there was a minor miscommunication that I assumed meant she didn’t want to go with me.

ANYWAY. That’s how I decided to go to senior prom without a date but in a big group. I spent most of the day watching Victorious while friend’s mom & her pals did my hair, and I didn’t have to make awkward small talk with them because they mainly spoke Portugese & would only address me every so often to coo over how pretty I was. This is an excellent way to spend a day btw. The friend whose mom it was didn’t have a date either, nor did a third friend, so there was no awkward “stand off to the side while we take pictures of the couples” moment. We got to the hotel, stayed and danced a little, only to conclude after about an hour that the juniors truly had ruined the budget before prom & that there wasn’t even room for us on the dance floor. I am very grateful to have friends who are/were more relaxed about what the Right Thing to do is, because what my friends ended up doing was declaring that this prom sucked in comparison to junior prom, and that we should all just walk across the street and go bowling. 

So we went bowling. In our prom dresses. 

They put the LED lights on for us. D and another girl’s dresses were white, so they glowed in the dark. Tik Tok by Kesha came on the music video screen. We all danced in the lanes. At one point an entire basketball team saw us dancing in the lanes and spontaneously joined in. At another point, the people in the lane over from us asked why we were dressed up. When they were leaving, they told us, “you know our prom was really special for us and we really want it to be special for you too, so we want you to have these,” and gave us glow rings. Glow ring HOOPS. Most everybody got glow ring bracelets from strangers, and I think I did too, but the inebriated, kind stranger told me “you get the big one, ‘cause it’s your birthday,” and put a giant glow ring hoop around my neck. I still have it.Then we all went back to my friend’s house to sleepover, and she has an outdoor garage, so we didn’t have to worry about noise or her parents. My friend made me red velvet cake with cream cheese and chocolate ships. 

Also, my ex-boyfriend’s date offered to make out with me, even though she was straight, because it was my birthday.

It was a good way to enter adulthood.14: Talk about a vacation.