#princesseacque

After waking up on your couch, same shirt you wore the previous day and dried tears staining your throw pillows - the events of yesterday came crashing down on you , so vivid that you couldn't tune them out -no matter how badly you wanted to.

Your next great idea was birthed underneath the stream of a scorching hot shower ---call in sick---plain simple and final. You couldn't face Jungkook, a rather childish part of you that couldn't handle a situation where you didnt have the upper hand, stood at your kitchen island and pressed foward on the subject mail directed to the man himself, in despite of the rational whisper at the back of your head that reminded you that he was your boss -it all got muffled by all the sirens dying to go off in your head.

you could still so vividly recall back to your first day in the office -not too far in the building from where you walked in, standing tall and refreshed ,a woman , stood teary eyed, posture pathetic with a box in her hands , ---that was Amanda. And at the brief , barely even there exchanged glance you knew --you felt it, an unspoken fuck you or goodluck -maybe both. you couldnt really tell.

The office building was ruthless, you expected it to be from the second you dedicated three months of your days into a certifiable assistant training programmed --because "that's how Mr Jeon likes his assistants" robotified and produced by the same functioning machine,

--Jungkook's difficulty was all you ever heard about , tales about how he couldn't keep an assistant and how Amanda had allegedly survived a good two weeks before she was used and thrown out on to the streets, --the bounty , the bets and all sorts on your quick exit was set at a three days max - citing the day of your arrival and your larger than life optimism as proof of facts ...you had to be a clutz- and Jungkook was going to destroy you.

mind you securing even an interview spot with the agency that got you here was no piece of cake, neither was the training program filled with conniving young women determined to rub shoulders with wealth and power --sure, you'd learned that the head handler was a man and focused your skills in less explored fields but , the matter of the fact was that you got in --you survived and you made connections strong enough to get to the 65th floor or Jeon&CO. For three more months you awaited the fury -kept a bag packed just for incase, kept the company apartment spotless - just incase...you awaited difficulty, until you fell into unspoken routine with the male rumored monster --what you had not accounted for was the long stream of ill mannered coworkers, silent sabotages that landed outdated client reports into your files that ended up on the ceo's desk - black coffee ''accidentally'' landing on the white blouse that you felt cute in right before a meeting with important inverstors -that had to be the shit that cost Amanda her spot

--He had yet to snap, yell or do anything to actally slight you and for a moment you wondered if he was just soft launching your discard -days turned weeks and weeks turned into a month, the whispers remained -so did you and if Jungkook was as bad as they described , he sure as hell picked his employees by personality standards that sat on borderline psychopathy - like his rumored self that you'd yet to meet yet somehow believed to exist. He'd so far kept responses to a hum - little to no acknowledgement at all , a coldness that you didn't really seem to mind and got used to - the memory of your first mishap still flashes before your eyes - that report you handed over , completed, perfected even --if it weren't for the out dated figures ,the ones that you'd received from a woman, nice and possibly around your age - Juna from team 3.

indifference always sat in his eyes, what you'd thought to be your end at that point in time —it wasn't explosive, like everything else that came with him, it was controlled, a clipped observation "This is out dated" -no disappointment - no surprise , like this was bound to happen and you were never there in the first place

you had actually lasted longer than most, the whispers like dust surfaced again but you were never that much of a quitter , with a stubborn spirit that always seems to guide you to act before even you can process your decisions --you reached for the report , heart nearly leaping out of your chest ,it could have been rage or fear --you couldn't quite tell ,but twenty minutes later the report was sorted and sat perfectly beside him ,perhaps it was then that you ceased to give much of a fuck over what remained of the rule book —subtly and manipulatively as his eyes drifted to the file, then to you , there action gone just as immediate.

You adjusted, you needed ears, allies and some sort of an entourage if you were going to run the corridors of Jeon Industries, so you got familiar –you walked the floors beneath Jungkook's until the structure made sense and then you did just what you did best, proved harmless and disarmed and became the special one - you became the peoples favorite --they called you his office wife.

you suited him so much --a married man whose wife you'd yet to meet even after months of working with, any other man --you'd bet a cheater but Jungkook had survived trips to Vegas, Private island campaigns, Rome -freaking Bali...with the skimpiest of bikinis pucked out for days that you could get to unwind and bask in the sun — you were living out your best life the best way you could , until it just wasnt enough and you wan/es more , you wanted him who remained respectful, a gentleman through it all, eyes never wandering to your best of assets yet still watching over you in times where you navigated foreign lands woth just him by ypur side

It made sense, you made a great team and slowly his silence and coldness towards you just registered as quiet understandment to you, ypu actually got closer than most so why couldn't you be allowed even more closer ?

somewhere in there in that mix - you began to shoot yourself right in the foot —you tried to understand Jungkook, the man who always seemed too far out of reach with a golden band just above a tattooed knuckle, tattoos you so curiously wondered about when your eyes rested on the ceiling , —a man sporting exhaustion and unwavering ignorance-- he was simply fascinating -and so hot you, somewhere in-between that curiosity and spending nearly 18 if not more hours of your day around him --somewhere there primal unhinged tendencies were born -suddenly, your hair was tied up leaving more room for your neck to show ,one more button left for the collar bones and just enough skin in-between to strike up some curiosity , he'd never notice —Yeonjun from marketing department noticed — friend of the office Jimin noticed and when his eyes lingered for longer while you left him in Jungkook’s office you wished it was Jungkook that looked at you like that

You could swear that you'd never so badly wanted to seduce a man as powerful as him , the thrill of the chase and the danger of the reality just further fed into your delusions and watered your work ethic, ---and once you had cemented your importance into his life you'd do you took to stalling -messing up, just slightly enough to leave room to linger in his presence longer.

Jungkook would be there, never suggestive ,robotic with a hint of basic humanity really , blend that with working so late into early mornings , rolled sleeves and veins straining against taught skin and most of all he was in charge - And you clinged to it all like a mad dog with a bone

-- somewhere along those lines, your best judgement quickly blurred into something that you'd allude far from hope, a bit more twisted and sinister - you anticipated the day he'd finally break, the day that Jungkook would cave for you and you maybe realized that what began as a harmless ctush had grown to dangerously venture along the lines of a grandiose entitlement, maybe even delusion birthed at the idea —fact that no man, on fully functioning legs had ever stood to last the test of time against you.

Not even Jeon Jungkook despite your apparent encounter and nearest Judgement.

You couldn't have that - would barely allow it with the kind of stubbornness you carried around -but for now you just needed two days,

riddled in humiliation and hurt masked as pride , you sent the email, blamed menstrual cramps and cited nausea -

he granted you three, a weekend ,no further explanation in the dry email that told you to return to work "when you are sufficiently recovered to fulfil and carry out your responsibilities without issue/ challenge" — a part of you wanted to believe that you were reaping the best fruits of your delusions that kept you from requesting a day off for the five months that you'd served the company...the other blinked the fury away – and proceeded to shoot yourself in the foot .

fueled and led by pure rage and stubbornness

--you did what any self respecting woman would do... ''focus on yourself''

you tried to switch off your gadgets...tried to sink yourself into a relaxing bath and let Jungkook realize just how empty his life --his office was without your light and competence to guide him through his days

no expectations...that's what you told yourself when all the self care barely cared and you found yourself back to your gadgets, refreshed and synced to no important notification whatsoever

for a minute there you thought the process of having your pride being dragged though shards of broken glass was an ongoing one , you poured yourself a glass of wine ; downed it like water until your mood lightened. In past dissapointments you'd already had yourself nice and naked, tasing some lucky loser on text or call so the irony is not lost on you when you find yourself hunche over the kitche island at 3am -instead of phone sex you're connected to the company's shared vpn mico analyzing every deet and piece of information that could help you track whatever kept him from merely concerning for you

there's logged meetings

investor calls

board reviews...nothing unusual and everything the exact same blend way

then a bitter taste forms in your mouth , it;s realization. Making your eye twitch or the mere audacity because how dare him

its an unreasonable train of thought that insists that Jungkook had not right to continue existing as though the centre of your world had been tipped over

He had no right and the chain of impulsivity is continued when you follow the rabbit hole , folders that you had no business opening from the comfort og your apartment - confidential...yet nowhere enough to get you fired

--the can of worms , every single trip , business and personal that Jungkook had travelled in the past month

you were not looking for anything in particular but you still braced yourself , you assure yourself that it was all standard procedure

you were just doing your job

-sun rises at 6 ...you have not gotten a wink of sleep but you now know Jungkook's preffered airlines and the exact number of trips that he embarked on in the past 12 months

you now know the hotels he frequented

you know some people he met nut you dont know her still

you know too much

and somehow not enough

Because nowhere among thousands of documents was there an answer to the only question you actually wanted answered.

Why not me?

the idea , the question make you nearly recoil into yourself

You slammed the laptop shut.

Silence filled the apartment immediately.

The kind of silence that only made room for ugly truths.

For a long moment you sat there.

Still.

Beneath all the embarrassment , there in the back of your mind, beneath the irritation and humiliation, another realization quietly took shape.

Three days away from him should have been enough to regain your senses.

Enough to remember who you were before Jeon Jungkook occupied every available corner of your brain.

Enough to kill whatever ridiculous fantasy you'd built around him.

Instead, all three days had done was prove something indefinitely worse.

your entire days had begun orbiting around his existence.

And that—

that was uncomfortably fucked up.

by the fourth day, you have managed to scrape yourself together

Barely stable --but it's enough for you to plunge your hips into a midi skirt , black in color and hardly breathable , paired with a shirt, crimson in color and complementary to your figure tucked in with buttons fully shut, save the top one for air --it cant be hellped, you cant help it .

You stare back at your own reflection un the mirror , you feel different —barely look the same and when the elevator fills up a sinking feeling takes place where you dont bother to interrupt the silence

the ride to the 65th floor is stifling -too slow for your liking, as though the walls are closing in around you –it feels like you have already fucked up, you feel incompetent, replaceable and you have never been claustrophobic before in the span of your colorful existence

–you got up extra early , an unstable nudge that wouldn't let you rest had kept you up all night, you shaved ,tried to self soothe, but you just ended up back on your gadgets...centred , you refreshed -- and resynced your digital updates over and over again —nothing new had showed up since the last 14 hours that you'd recieved the last update

She's sure it's just a glitch , parking in her usual spot and nearly skipping to the building entrance —miid a lot different compared to ypur last time here

a strange effect of sleep deprivation

You pass through reception, you chirp your greetings ,you don't bother standing to gauge reactions —questioning and something else

elevator is stifling , you're at the center of it all, perfumes, paper and strong coffee that just reminds you to pick up his order

When the elevator doors open at his your floor --your stop

a breath escaped you, not nervous...determined and bracing. It's quiet as ever, the golden coated doors shut as they forever are, you are nowhere near late but you know the workaholic is already there situated behind his desk at a warping 6:30am . You have nothing for him today, not his schedule and definitely not his coffee, you stand three feet away from his door ...you cant get yourself to move, until something in your brain snaps --Assistant.

your emotions did not matter -not to him, barely registered to you, so when you feet turn in the opposite direction, your return is swift with a dark unsweetened bitter coffee in your hands

for the first time in a while when your knuckles softly meet the shiny black door in a soft knock, you mean it , stood upright and professional, you don't take his silence for a silent welcome --you don't budge until he tells you to come in.

Never readable, not even a glimpse to dwell your hope

Your mood is just sour , vindictive and in the same unreasonable way children act out —you hold your silence, extra perfection in the name of spite, even your proximity shifts to barely around .

You suck a breath in and swing the door open

Hes your boss.

You and him were never on the greeting terms , you were told he disliked meaningless chatter and that poured over to mundane niceties —you dont bother

It's bright in his office, the 7am sun laminating the golden interiors of the space, and he is at the center of it all, with the friendly reminder of his wife right where you'd lasted seen it

a nasty reminder of what he made you

his coffee is set where he expects it, robotically you inform him of a meeting scheduled for 9am –crisp, cut and clean

he wont respond, won't glance , you force your feet to lift and turn you for exit

"Y/N" chilling, you tense before turning

"Yes sir?"

his eyes are already on you, pen relaxed between a pair of his tattooed fingers, ignore it ...

You blink the sight away and cuss him out with the empty fury in your eyes when they meet his

fuck else can you do

It feels like decades pass before he speaks again

"Im going to need that draft of the guest list emailed to me before 10"

you narrow your eyes, you damn near pout with a question -it'd disrupt your whole apparent shtick , a dent of incompetence that would just shoot straight to your pride

...still bitterly , and not knowing would be worse - worst part , your hand shakes at your side, and he studies you, unfazed- expectant - unblinking.

"_guest list?"

silence.... a beat passes , you stop counting and opt to refresh anything where this guest list might make sense --nothing shows up, panic rises

"I was certain that would have caught your eye amidst your hours of scrapping through decades worthy of information.. "

you hate what he's implying... you hate that you also have no clue what he's talking about, so terribly that this office is starting to feel like a humiliation rituals ground

you dont respond, fatefully avoid his gaze

"draft the guest list for the Annual Corporate Leadership Summit, ensure that all key stakeholders, executive partners, and strategic allies are represented. The list must reflect both our organizational priorities and our brand stature.”

you didn't even blink, and you missed it...the attitude cannot be helped when you purposefully click your heels against his marbled floors and hope he figures something.

in thirty minutes time you cozied up to Minju, you heard of the Summit and got a hang of what that meant for you , at exactly ten Jungkook has his guest list - with your own petty addition of Jeon and Mrs.