“They’re amphibians sure, but you can’t-someone’s at the door.” Angie cut herself off. Her head turned to stare down the front door. She gave a small snarl, a habit she had yet to grow out of after settling back into society.

 “Anyone we know?” Stanley felt light, a goofy grin had spread itself across his lips as Molly ran a toy car into his foot repeatedly.

 “He don’t smell familiar. Almost.” Angie said. “He kinda smells like you if’n I’m being honest.” She added after a beat.

 “Well, Ford and Fidds’ aren’t gonna be back until nightfall. Might as well-” Stanley slowly pushed himself off the couch. Angie gave a soft squeak as she fell to the floor. “Darn, sorry Ang.”

 “It’s fine.” Angie picked herself up.

 “Like I was saying; might as well tell them to come around later if they want them.” Stanley said. He made his way to the front door.

 “And what if he wants you?” Angie asked.

 “Ha, unlikely,” Stanley said smugly.

 “Is it really that hard to believe?” said the man at the door.

 Stanley’s stomach fell.

 “Who’s there?” Angie asked, baring her teeth as though they were her werewolf fangs.

 “Stanley should know who I am. After all we were pretty close weren’t we?” the man teased. Stanley could see the smug smile on the man's face despite the door between them. “Or am I too embarrassing to discuss with your ‘werewife’?”

 “How do you-Stanley do you know who’s outside?” Angie asked. Her head tilted to the side while her face twisted with confusion.

Stanley wanted some answers himself. He’d only come up with his pet name for Angie the previous night. The man outside knew more than he should, and Stan needed to know how much.

 “What do you want Jimmy?” Stanley demanded. He balled up his fists.

 “Jimmy?”

 “Oh come on kitten, is that any way to treat an old friend?” Jimmy teased. He leaned against one of the awning supports. “And I came all this way from Cali too.”

 “Who’s Jimmy?” Angie asked.

 “My ex.” Stanley said, he stared at Jimmy’s shadow through the door’s fencing. “Don’t avoid the question Snakes. If you’re here to hurt me or my family, you’ve got another thing coming.”

 “Hey now, no need to be so confrontational Stan; I’m here because of you after all.” Jimmy said.

 “We’ve got pitcher of holy water if’n that’ll convince you to talk,” Angie offered.

 “Feisty. I can see why you tied the knot with her Kitten.” Jimmy smiled. “But I’d advise against the holy water. Wouldn’t end too well for Little ol’ Lee you see.”

 “What are you talking about,” Angie stepped forward with a growl.

 “Come on out first. It’s a lovely day and it’s been years since I’ve seen you. Plus I’d love to see the lovely lady that stole your heart.” Jimmy added cheekily.

 “How can we be sure that you won’t try any funny business?” Angie asked.

 “If I let you bring your pitcher of holy water, would that put you at ease?” Jimmy asked.

  “You know I was joking right?” Jimmy asked.

 He wore a spiked leather jacket and dark jeans. His blonde hair was tied in a ponytail that sat on his shoulder. He wore a pair of sunglasses that sat down his nose. His skin was sickly pale, very much like Stan. A pair of fangs poked out from under his moustache.

 “Well I wasn’t,” Angie said flatly.

 “I can see that,” Jimmy shot back.

 “So um, what was that about killing you not being good for me?”Stanley asked. He was parked between his wife and ex on the couch on the porch and was not enjoying this situation in the slightest.

 “Right that,” Jimmy leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. “So remember when we were dating and we somehow thought it was the best idea for me to turn you into a vampire?”

 “Yeah?” Stanley’s stomach tied itself into a tight knot.

 “And how you ran away the next night because you realised that you weren’t comfortable with the idea and I kinda forced the decision on you?” Jimmy sighed. “Turns out that when a human gets turned by a vampire, a bond is formed.”

 “What kind of bond?” Stanley asked. “I kinda have a good thing going on here.”

 “To cut an essay on vampire powers, that I’m sure your brother would probably leap at a chance to read, short. You're basically one of my lesser vampires.” Jimmy sighed.

 “I beg your pardon?” Angie glared.

 “I can read Stan’s mind, and command his actions. But don’t get me wrong, I didn’t do anything to him.” Jimmy raised his arms in surrender. Angie raised the pitcher, there was a fire in her eye that Jimmy did not want to get caught in. “I just checked in on him from time to time to see how he was doing.”

 “Command my actions?” Stanley asked in disbelief. “Listen Jimmy, I know you’re a vampire and a biker but you can't make me do wh-” Stanley smacked himself in the face. “-nevermind.”

 “So what now?” Angie asked. “Stan follows you around at night hunting down poor souls to make an immortal army?”

 “God no.” Jimmy shook his head. “Too much of a hassle.”

 “Then what do you want?” She asked.

 “I found a way to break the bond, and I’m here to deliver.” Jimmy grinned. He reached into his jacket.

 “And how do we do that?” Stanley asked. “A fight to the death or something?”

 “‘Or something’” Jimmy said. “All you need to do is drink my blood and you’ll be your own independent vampire.”

 “Okay but why.” Stanley asked.

 “Why what?”

 “Why bring this up now, why even try to fix this? I’ve been living like this for years and nothing's gone wrong for me.” Stanley said standing up.

 “That’s just it Stan. If I let this go on something will go wrong.” Jimmy said. “Last year I got in a really bad crash while on my bike. I lost so much blood that the paramedics used up all their blood packs trying to keep me from passing on.”

 “Right.”

 “While I was being wheeled off to the hospital my mind left my body, probably looking for a Lesser to take over their body so that I don’t die. But when I got to your body. I saw you with your kids, finally making up with your brother. A loving partner by your side. I couldn't’ take that from you.” Jimmy pulled a small vial of dark red liquid from his jacket. “Think of this as a way to bury the hatchet between us. And a late wedding gift,” Jimmy added with a smirk.

 Stanley stared at the vial. “Is it really that simple?” he asked.

 “Normally a Lesser would plan some elaborate betrayal in order to prove their independence from their master before finally earning their freedom in the final coup of their master. But I’d rather cut that middleman and get back to riding on my bike.” Jimmy smiled.

 “So this is goodbye?” Stanley asked.

 “For now,” Jimmy said. He picked up the motorcycle helmet off the porch. “If you’ll excuse me I’ve got some roads to drive along recklessly.” he winked.

 “You’re a good sort Jimmy.” Angie said. She put down the pitcher of holy water and offered Jimmy a hand.

 “I’m glad to hear it,” Jimmy said. He shook her hand. “Take good care of this ol’ kitten for me now.”

 “I always planned to,” Angie grinned.

 “Well. I’ll be off now.”Jimmy said. He gave an eager wave before slipping on his helmet and walking off into the afternoon sun.

 Stanley and Angie watched Jimmy ride off towards town. The dust his bike kicked up got into Stan’s nose, making him sneeze his accursed adorable sneeze.

 “I still hate that nickname,” Stanley lied. He scratched his nose.

 “I don’t know, I think it suits you perfectly.” Angie grinned.

fun fact: when I originally thought up this fic, I had the image of Jimmy getting a ‘goodbye’ kiss from Stan, and then cutting his tongue on STan’s fangs to give him his blood. but that didn’t really fit the story or tone of the scene so it got cut.