#potentially upsetting

We have learned a couple things about the original draft in an interview:

It was a LOT darker than the current manga and it was more shocking, with more character death.

Ray died for real in the original draft. It is not mentioned how he died.

The editor asked Shirai to rewrite some of these contents, as they didn't think it would be acceptable for print in SWJ, and they felt Shirai was overusing disturbing content.

Shirai agreed with the editor, and is happy with how the rewrite turned out (THANK THE HEAVENS FOR THAT EDITOR)

I have recently been looking at parallels between the Bible and TPN, and I have managed to peg a number of characters as likely references for Apostoles. With some help, I even got Norman as Lesser St. James and Emma as St. Paul.

(I will reblog this post with a link if you want to read more on that...)

The thing that bothered me however was that I could not find a Judas. I thought that Judas was a pretty central character to the Bible, so I didn't think it would be a minor character or introduced late...

Then I remembered that there WAS A BIG BETRAYAL early on in the manga by Ray... and suddenly I realized that:

Judas betrayed Jesus who he was very close with for a grand total of 30 silvers, which wasn't much at all. Ray received little knick knacks for his betrayal of his closest friends. He used them to build a device to disable the tracker.

After Jesus died, Judas was full of remorse and grief, and wanted no part in the 30 silvers. After Norman was shipped, Ray wanted no part in the escape nor the device he worked hard to make.

Judas eventually comitted suicide. Ray wanted to commit suicide, and in the final version of the TPN he tries to self-immolate, but Emma saves his life.

Judas was later replaced by a new man, Matthias. Fire often signifies rebirth, so I think Ray's fake death can be taken as a metaphorical death, where he stops being the Judas of the series, and instead he becomes a changed man, the Matthias who replaced Judas.

Judas died by hanging. In the original draft, that was much darker, and Ray died, he was a much closer analog to Judas. That means his death was probably closer to Judas' as well. You know what else became useless to Ray once Norman was gone? The rope they had been planning to escape with...

I honestly feel like crying...

Please send help and support... I can't believe that Shirai would think having a 12-year-old hang himself is acceptable material for teenagers to read....

I honestly just feel hurt thinking about this.

I tried to stop, but then I remembered my other recent theories like... SON-JU MAY HAVE EATEN JAMES RATRI BY HIS OWN WISH TO PRESERVE HIS KNOWLEDGE AND STOP IT FROM FALLING INTO PETER'S HANDS...

or

LEUVIS MAY BE MUJIKA'S FATHER WHO PROTECTED HER FROM BEING HUNTED DOWN BY THROWING OFF OTHER NOBLES AS AN ARCHDUKE... AND EMMA KILLED HIM... WHAT WOULD MUJIKA FEEL IF SHE KNEW EMMA KILLED HER FATHER?!

or

NORMAN MIGHT GET A GRUESOME DEATH SCENE TO REVEAL HE HAS REGENERATIVE ABILITIES DUE HAVING BEEN GENETICALLY ENGINEERED AT LAMBDA BEFORE BIRTH

I just feel really depressed and sick now... how on Earth can you hurt me so much Kaiu Shirai-san... I wish my brain didn't work the same way as yours... what does this say about me...?! maybe I should take a break from sinking into tpn theories so much... I feel like Norman and Ray combined in the gif with Don being the theory...