#posts about physics guy

I am now remembering that he complimented my hair. Which maybe is more direct flirting, since he has not been forward in any way. mostly it is his demeanor that seemed like flirting most of the time. That and the joke last time about hating opposite foods: "we'd be perfect." When we realized what time it was I joked that he's been a corrupting influence and he argued that he'd been perfectly gentlemanly. That felt especially flirty.

Hmm. I need more data. I really hope I am special though and that he's not uh having nine hour zoom dates with other women. I want this to be a victory! I feel like I am going to set my mind on getting this man for myself.

He practices card tricks and showed me a few... and he has nice hands. I tried to notice. He wanted me to guess how he pulled the trick off and lots of hilarity ensued. Part of the trick is pretending that you've screwed it up and I didn't believe that he'd screwed it up - his fake incompetence was not convincing. I knew he was still tricking me.

We talked for 6 hours, which is good for us given that we once talked for 9. Yes, I told him I have a crush on him, which he quickly responded to with the fact that he has more than a crush on me, the one-upper. And that he wants to meet in person. “Tuesday?” not possible, youre in Europe! and I am not!

Yall. I really like him. Which I also said later on, to my credit. I brought it up again just to say, I really like you, and I dont like most people! and he said the same thing back. But like. Why cant we kiss. Through zoom. Why is there covid. Why...why. Why.....

Ok what else. He said my story was the best thing that has been submitted to the writing group, period. SO...yay?

And that he knew at hour 8 of our 9 hour conversation that...something. That he likes me? implied? he’s very slippery.

I told him that to be fair, I had not ASKED to judo throw him. He had offered. And he said “yes! because that’s the kind of guy I am!” Ah, perfect. Now I need to practice my judo!

I said it’s weird that without covid, without the writing group and without my story, us meeting would have nev-

him: “would have been delayed.”

An optimist!

Ok I am tired. Happy new year guys.

Bad thought- I hope me saying I have a crush on him was not a bad move. He cant actually be IN LOVE with me. I know he’s got it BAD but he can’t have it THAT bad. If he did, me saying I have a crush on you would be....bad. But we’ve only known each other for 2 months so SOMETHING needed to be said and he was taking his sweet time. Eh....we’ll see.

:)

We are talking again in a few days god help me Im about to be driven mad by the sight of a man’s bare forearm because thats ALL I can GET

GOODNIGHT

At some point yall are going to think I’m making shit up because I SWEAR TO GOD.

Here I was all concerned that I was too muscular and blah blah blah too butch blah blah and this guy... the pullups came up again because he said his brother in law can do 20 and I said huh, I don’t know anyone else who can do as many as me, which I gleefully sort of enjoy, and technically I’ve done 21 and 22 a few times, so I beat his brother in law (or that’s the idea or whatever). he wanted to see the video....I showed him. my shirt’s on in this one ok. I wouldn’t feel brazen enough for the other one. HE LITERALLY....said it was sexy. that word has never escaped his lips before now so you bet your ass I noticed. I cannot even deal with this I am going to launch myself into the SUN. WHAT IS MY LIFE? I’m sorry this is too FUNNY. ITS TOO FUNNY. WHO IS WRITING THIS WEIRD ASS SCREENPLAY

No but actually, he hit me with one of the best compliments Ive ever gotten. I dont know who the fuck put a love spell on this guy but he said before he knew about that about weightlifting, that he thought I exuded strength in my personality, and that I’m one of the most genuine people he’s ever met.

Anyway I.............................................WHAT THE FUCK

He feels slightly imposter-ish about my compliments to him, and believes that I am being genuine but is puzzled by my description of his eyes and lips. I’ve been staring at his face for many hours, of course I enjoy staring at it.

Oh jesus christ his comments on my lips. WHY ARE YOU GUYS READING THIS THIS IS HORRIBLE HORRIBLE STUFF

We had some interesting conversations about fears and shit. philosophical. like a conversation you’d have at a sleepover. I love that stuff. we actually had like....some conversations interspersed with the staring and flirting.

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH I would kill someone just to be able to kiss him. He moved the laptop onto his lap and said “how do you feel about being on my lap” sexually frustrated is how i feel, fuck you very much. He was sort of melting into the mattress at the end, trying to figure out where to put the laptop, and wanting it to be over him so he could look up at me. So um. I’d be very happy there.

Yep.

I told him I like the creases at the corners of his eyes. I really like them a lot. He has very kind eyes.

He joked about how he’s not doing a good job of “seducing” me. This is scandalous stuff for us. When one of us actually says the word “kiss” I will have a stroke. Him talking about my lips was .....a lot.

I told him I’d write a poem in verse about alternate ways we could have met, and he looked like a cat that got the cream.

Oh bitch I’m so sexually frustrated I could cry.

He said, first of all, his family will not mind me stealing him twice next week because they want him to be happy. Then he said the picture he took of the countryside didn't do it justice, so he wrote me a story. It was four pages. It was whimsical, dark, funny and romantic? By turns? And was about a French university student who became such a talented speaker that she dazzled a tall gentleman... who happened to be the devil himself and made him fall in love with her. After rescuing her from peril, the devil gave her a cottage near the Alps, an inkwell that would never dry so she could write whenever she wanted, a hearth that would never go cold, a talking cat, and promised that if she ever wanted to talk he would immediately appear to discuss philosophy, mathematics and poetry with her at any hour, for as long as she liked.

ok zoom date number 6 was 5 hours and it was so nice -_-

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh my god. this is a long very stupid post just fyi

I felt like it was very much flirting when I said “you should take this with a grain of salt” and he immediately said “never”. it just FELT LIKE FLIRTING. it was flirting

this guy has imposter syndrome and he has a physics phd who works at (redacted) like is there no justice

he reread my short story and said this time around, now that he knows me, he “recognizes” me in the story so that seems.......WHAT. positive, slightly alarming but positive

what else did he say about it - he said again that he thought it flowed perfectly, he really liked how it flowed and developed. i asked if anything else stood out that needed change and he pointed to a few sentences that were slightly unclear!! helpful!!! he kept telling me I could throw out all of his opinions at any time but they were really good. him repeating how much he liked it was very nice :|  he said it was wonderful reading it over breakfast and he hates doing anything in the morning

I kept trying to be like “its late, am I keeping you up?” because of the six hour time difference but he insisted that I get “revenge” and keep him up until 4 am his time........so I did

he was very sleepy so he was like “you talk” and that was actually very nice lol oh god help he wants to hear me talk about random things

“next time we talk-” BECAUSE THIS IS JUST A THING NOW. it was already a thing but it’s even more of a THING.

me: yeah I dont like sitting on the beach either I get sunburned so easily

him: yeah and plate armor is so uncomfortable

I SAID HE WAS GOOFY AS FUCK LMAO. I SAID IT

he wanted me to rant about something so I ranted about how guys always assume women only do brazilian jiu jitsu for self defense, that was fun. this is still part of my campaign to figure out his stance on sexism because so far anti imperialism and anti racism is a check mark. he seemed very down with my feminist rant, so that was good

I mentioned how I didn’t want to put a patch I was given by my Kyoto martial arts school onto my gi because of how blood can get on the gi and he was like UM WHAT???? WHAT?????? and kept giving me a hard time about this supposedly peaceful sport involving occasional (ACCIDENTAL) BLOOD. it was hilarious. this is where he was like “i’m glad you’re on my side”. hehe......

we talked a lot about music, music theory, and music we like and why we like it - whether it feels authentic, that was really interesting. and fun. we have so many interesting conversations :<

he talked about meeting his baby nieces and how cute they are

ugh literally kill me now

I think it would be satisfying to pin a 6′2″ man to the ground. just some thoughts I’ve been having unrelated to anything else in this post. moving along.

he complained about the workout his brother in law made him do and then said he was just trying to sound “butch” (LOL) and I told him because he was in so much pain I wouldn’t challenge him to a pushup contest. that made him LAUGH

dude is HILARIOUSLY interested in cars and was excited to hear I own a Prius which is just.. funny. I thought they were supposed to have really bad acceleration but he was impressed or something WHAT IS WRONG WITH MEN I say that in the nicest way possible