Postal slop day #i don't even know😭😭

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Postal slop day #i don't even know😭😭

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There's barley any PJava headcannons so I decided to list some of my own, most of them are just about him but some are X reader
also like 3 of them are NSFW so you were warned
- Around 40 years old
- He's really large, around 203cm tall and overweight
- Mostly listens to gabber but also enjoys nu metal
- Has a lot of DIY body modifications, not really visible unless he specifically decides to show them off (split tongue, stick and poke tattoos, piercings and stretched earlobes)
- Half Russian, he barley knows any words other than swears but still has a pretty strong Russian accent
- His body looks like a battlefield. Full of sh scars and one of his eyes is missing, replaced with a prosthesis with a black sclera. Even though it's obvious he really hates when it's pointed out
- Extroverted, has a lot of colleagues but is unable to hold anything more serious for more than a week
- Really strong, works out a lot but eats so much that he can't really loose weight no matter how much he tires
- Can't hold a conversation without interrupting
- Psychopath
- Self centered, won't really do anything for another person unless it benefits him in some way but also won't try put others down for no reason
- If he likes you he will start bringing you trinkets from his 'collection', sometimes even buys (or steals) you things that reminded him of you
- Only dude that doesn't really do drugs, he only smokes and drinks alcohol (not in reasonable amounts, obviusly)
- Schizophrenic but actually medicated unlike other dudes
- Gets really violent when angry
- Hoarder, refuses to throw anything away and hates people touching his stuff
- though living in filth, tries to take care of himself, only way you could tell would be him smelling pretty bad
- Bad at showing affection, but he's a decent kisser and really good in bed
- Has a weird relationship with his car, uses only feminine pronouns when referring to it and gets really mad when anyone even implies it's just an object and not a real person
- Terrible eating habits, will eat pretty much anything even if it's rotten, his favorite snack are roasted coffee beans
- Acts before thinking
- cries over pretty much anything, no matter how much he tries to hide it
- Has a staring problem, if he's looking at you you'll know it
- Bad at math, can barley count past 10
- His dick is average in size but looks small compared to the rest of his huge body
- Uses his phone a lot, after first meeting with him he'll instantly send you friend requests on every social media he owns and texts you back immediately no matter what
- Has a Nokia X2-00 and a Nokia N-gage QD
- Hates taking about his sexual preferences, if you want to know what kinks he might have you'd have to literally force that out if him
- Pirates pretty much anything he can, has a whole collection of burnt CDs with movies, games and music
- Bites A LOT during sex, sometimes so hard it draws blood
- Psychically unable to form even a single sentence without swearing
- knows how to lockpick
Most of em are really negative lmao, maybe will try to think of some more positive ones in the future. Might also write some about his relationship with other dudes but idk for now
Also English isn't my first language and I don't want it to be, all mistakes are made out of my pure hatred for this language.
You can bet that 3Dude would actually eat it too
They were bludgeoned by P1 and JDude after
God help P3 if he decided to prank JDude by burning his house🙏🙏🥀

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
I just made some BULLSHIT
Oughh
Postal capcut slop since the exam is tomorrow and I don't have anything good to post
Also why is there only 1 video limit help i want to post like 5 or more☹️