#positivelymoral

The Point Of No Return || Phantom of the Opera AU (femme-and-still-not-ginger, the-beautifully-tragic-queen, positively-moral, tragicallyelphaba)

   Did this outfit have to show this much skin? She was practically in a bathing suit, and wasn't too sure about how comfortable she could possibly feel dressed like this. Her skirt was not even made of a fabric, only beads falling down to her ankles covered her legs-legs that you could still see the smooth skin of. But she had worn worse perhaps, in her many years as a dancer in The Paris Opera House. She had been here for so long that it felt like her whole life had been lived within the walls of this opera house, but in truth it had not even been a full ten years of living and preforming here.

     She looked at the girls around her as they waited just off stage for their chance to dance, all of them just the same as when they were little. To her left was Jenny, a pretty young blonde girl who was the daughter of Madam Giry-a woman who was in charge of all the dancers. On her other side was Clara, a caramel skinned brunette who had a smile like an angel and a heart of gold, she liked her a lot, she was really sweet. To her right was Amy, a girl with firey red hair that matched her sassy personality  Beside Amy was her sister Ruby, just as sassy as her older sister but was far too much of a flirt, hitting on anything that walked. She looked over her shoulder at Belle, a girl with sweet brown curls. She was terribly shy and quiet, never talked to anyone much, she just seemed to always have her nose in some book- she loved to read. And then beside her was Reinette, the oldest of the dancers. She was always serious and hated when people played around, but she was very pretty.

   She heard the tone in the music that cued their time to dance, following the other girls out into the middle of the stage. Their costumes consisted of a light brown material over their breasts that was a little too tight, covered in dark brown swirls as a pattern. Their skirts were basically just underwear covered by strings of golden bears that went down to their ankles. They showed a little too much skin for her taste but they were easy to dance in, especially in this number.

   As she danced with the other, her bendy limbs doing as she was commanded, flipping and bending and stretching, she felt an odd sense of accomplishment that she always got when dancing. Though she craved to know what it felt like to sing in front of a crowd, dancing was a good second best. As the dance came to an end she stuck in the same position on the ground as the others and watched as the theaters lead soprano Madam Zelena stepped up to continue to sing with Walsh, a respected tenor; the duo in addition to them being leads, were also the power couple of the opera house. She never took too kindly to the pair, always looking down on everyone else like they were lesser people than they were.

   When the number was finally over, she heard the owner of the Opera Populaire Ms Cora, the former owners wife. The former owner, Henry, had died of an unexpected heart condition a few years before, leaving his wife in charge of the opera house. Cora was a beautiful older woman, one who was not to be messed with-one whose life revolved, it seemed, around how much control she had. 

   "As you can see, the rehearsal for Hannibal is already underway" Cora said, her voice low and silky as she gestured to the group, her words directed at two men that Jillian didn't recognize. One of them was short and walked with a cane, an almost foul look on his face. He had soft looking salt and pepper hair that went down to his shoulders and, framing his chiseled face. Many of the other girls, especially Belle, were staring at him like he was God. Yes he was handsome, and if Jillian had to admit so she found him terribly attractive but she knew better than that. Though she could tell that Ruby didn't Ruby who was biting her lip and telling her sister Amy how gorgeous and rich he must be. 

   The other man had graying hair, hair she could tell used to be a firey red just like Amy's. He looked a good foot and a half taller than the other man, a bit of a goofy look on his face. 

   "Ladies and gentlemen, please, if I could have your attention?" Ms Cora called as she led the men into the group, the two of them not bothering to act as if they weren't gawking at the dancers; herself included. "I know that for some weeks, there have been rumors of my imminent retirement. I can now tell you that these are all true" she said, a few people looking at each other as if to silently point out they were right on their opinions about the rumors, Jillian herself staying quiet as she felt Jenny hold her hand.

   "And now it is my great please to introduce you to the two gentlemen who now the Opera Populaire. "Misure Rumpelstiltskin Gold and Misure Brian Williams" she said, gesturing to each man as they were named. The two men acknowledged the group, the one introduced by the name Williams waved at the group who clapped for them, the other simply nodded. 

For as long as Jillian could remember, she had wanted nothing more than to hide behind a mask and walk unseen among the people of the world, prying eyes for once not looking at her. The idea was so tempting, the fantasy that she could be in the middle of a crowd of her own enemies but to be treated like a stranger; no hatred or anger yet no love or affection. The idea of being invisible or neutral. It was a beautiful and untouchable idea. But it was such a thing that would never truly be, a wish that would never be granted and a dream that would never come true. Who was she kidding? She would always be a spoiled princess or a murderous pirate to the world around her, a reputation attached to her that would never go away. She would always be hated by the world around her, for one reason or another, and she would always be someone that she herself could not stand; a lonely monster trapped inside the body of a beautiful woman.

Jillian didn't used to be this person, she never even used to be a person who realized that the world was bigger than what was inside the walls of her father's castle. She was the youngest daughter to a great king and his queen, with an older sister who adored her. They were the perfect family, that was until her mother died. Her mother's death affected her father more than anyone, turning him into a horrible person-mostly to her. He favored her sister Belle for every reason in the book. She was brilliant, she looked more like their mother, she was a proper lady; Belle was everything a princess was supposed to be. While Jillian, who unknowingly acted more like her mother than anyone would ever admit to, was a free spirit. She liked to play in the dirt and wrestle with other children, she liked to get into trouble and be as unlike a princess as it could get. And for her adventurous nature, her father hated her and put her sister first, since it was Belle who was to become queen of their kingdom.

But when Jillian was sixteen, her kingdom had fallen on hard times. And her father became so desperate that he did the one thing that both his daughters begged him not to-he called upon The Dark One. And the situation turned out worse than they had expected. Rumpelstiltskin agreed to save their kingdom, but in exchange for her sister. She didn't know why she was surprised when Belle agreed to go with him, she honestly didn't. Belle had always been the type that would do most anything to help others. And if giving up her life as a princess for the life of The Dark One's servant would help a whole kingdom of people then she would do it, and she did. But Jillian was surprised nonetheless, because that meant Belle was leaving her behind, she was leaving her to the mercy of their father. And once she was gone, her hell began.

Her father's anger was taken out on her twice fold, and her life became nothing but being prepared to take over his kingdom, come time she would be of age. Reading, writing, dancing, speech givings, meeting the people, dress fittings-thats all her life was. When she had all those things when Belle was around at least it was split between the two of them but now it was all on her, the world on her shoulders.

When she turned eighteen and the time was coming closer to her being crowned queen, she realized this wasn't the life for her. If her sister could leave then so could she. She knew she wouldn't be a good queen, this wasn't what she wanted in life. So before she knew it she was running away from the only home she had ever known in the middle of the night with absolutely no goals in mind as to what the hell she was doing. And it was that, that got her to live in the woods. She lived in the trees, hiding from the world for six months before she would be caught.

It was a late night in the pitch blackness of the trees that she was caught by The Evil Queen's huntsman, having run from him for an hour and hidden in several trees before he finally caught her. She was good but he was better. She found, when she was finally caught by the hunter, that he was much kinder than she originally gave him credit for. But, due to The Evil Queen having his heart, he was under orders to bring any strays living in the forest to her for punishment. Had running away from home been worth this? In a strange way, yes it was.

When she finally was brought before the queen, she found her to be both dangerous and beautiful. And to save her own life she begged for a job as a servant, something that now both she and Belle had in common, so as to save herself from whatever the queen usually did to people like her. And somehow her charm combined with her obvious desperation landed her a job as the queens personal chamber maid. After having been given the job she counted her lucky stars, not only for the fact that she was still alive but because there were rumors around the castle that the queen had some sort of sordid relationship with The Dark One. Maybe working there, she could find a way to the horrifying imp, a way to her sister. If she could find Belle they could both be free together, free to start new lives far away from the lands and the people who had only brought them harm and shame. 

But in the five years she worked for the queen, she never once saw The Dark One. She had somehow because a pet to the queen, a closeted lover of women's touches, much like her friend The Huntsman. She felt like trash, like a whore. She was a pet to The Evil Queen and had made absolutely no progress on finding her sister. So with the help of the huntsman, her only friend in the world, she ran away from yet another life that she didn't want. She never knew if anyone looked for her after that, she never knew if anyone cared. She only felt bad that now The Huntsman would have to deal with The Queens urges alone without her help.

She only stayed in town for maybe a week before she met Killian Jones, or Captain Hook, in a tavern in the lesser parts of The Evil Queens kingdom. She spent all night drinking rum with him and his crew, listening to the stories of their wonderful adventures and the places they had been. And somehow, thanks to her charm, she conned her way onto his crew. He had a goal to kill Rumpelstiltskin, something she of all people could understand. And if being a pirate could help her do that, if traveling with someone who could train her and help her, was the way to kill him-then so be it. 

So for a year she was a part of the crew that sailed under the black flag of The Jolly Rodger, trained in the ways of piracy. Sailing, sword fighting, thieving, navigating-anything she could ever need to know. And for that year, she was a lover to her captain. She was the only woman on the ship, obvious the object of most of the men's affections and the target of their lust. But it was her captain who had the right to bed her, still never knowing it was a princess who he was bedding. Many nights on their ship were spent the two of them tangled between his sheets, finding warmth in the others burning skin during the ice cold nights at sea.

But after a year, when her training was done and she was the best sword fighter of them all, she knew she had to go. She had been with them a year, and they had been searching for The Dark One for more than a hundred years before that. If they hadn't achieved anything in all that time then how would now be any different? And she found that she wanted much more than just to be a part of a crew, she wanted to captain one. So she said goodbye to her lover and to the friends she had made on his crew for good.

It was a year later, a year when the world thought that little Jillian French, who now went by the name Jillian Graham, fell into nothing. But a year after leaving The Jolly Rodger, she acquired a ship that she so humbly named The Blue Nightmare, and filled it with a crew of the strongest and smartest pirates she could find. And she set out on her own adventures, gaining a reputation as one of the most feared pirates in all the lands. She killed, she robbed, she tortured, she destroyed-she became something that she herself would have been afraid of only a few years before then. And for years it continued, her adventures that all finally led her to where she thought she could find The Dark One's castle. 

But it was only just before then, that she heard rumors that the princess who served him had died. Her life was empty and void of all reason. Belle was gone...what did she have to work for now? Revenge, thats what. He was why her life was ruined and he would die for what he did to her. And she was alone on land, running toward where she thought his castle might be when she suddenly heard a joined scream through out the realm. What hell could be causing such violent screams? She would soon find out when she was running through the woods from a speeding cloud of lavender smoke that swallowed her whole like a shark with its prey. 

And when she woke, she was Jillian Graham, a bartender at The Rabbit Hole. And for twenty eight years under The Dark Curse she would stay just that. Jillian Graham was a simple girl, an unloved orphan, who worked at the only bar in town. She was best friends with Mr Gold the pawn broker and lived in a crappy apartment and drove a crappy car and tutored kids during the day for extra money. She was normal, still alone but normal all the same. 

But when the curse was broken her whole life changed. She could remember everything from where she grew up to her last thoughts before being consumed by a fog of violent magic that ripped her away from the only realm she had ever known. Her first thought was about how disgusting she was, having become close friends with Rumpelstiltskin himself. There were days and days of fighting before she decided she had to let it go. It was decades ago and in another world, she especially decided to let it go when her sister turned up alive and well.

And it was only days after that, that she and Henry were out by the mines looking for Archie's dog Pongo, who ever since the curse broke had gone awall.  And it was there that she tripped over her own two feet and nearly fell into a hole. Thought she may have escaped it, the necklace she wore that had traveled between worlds with her hadn't. It had been her mothers, somehow never leaving her between the realms. She couldn't just let it go. And thanks to Henry's wonderful brain he remembered that Emma had told him that the elevator in the abandoned library led down to wherever that hole went. The dragon down there had been killed just before the curse was broken so she had nothing to fear right?

She almost didn't know what she was doing as she got into the elevator, the eleven year old lowering her down. What could she possibly run into down there? Would there be a dead dragon down there? Would there be rats? Would there even be anything there? What if her mother's necklace wasn't even down there? As the elevator finally stopped at the bottom, she made sure her knife was secure in her boot before stepping out and looking around. Rocks and darkness was all she could see. She turned on the flash light she held in her hand and looked around, fog messing up her vision.

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url: don’t get it | not bad | nice | good job | love it omg | who did you kill

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Headcanon about our characters:

When Regina was first married to King Leopold, she was forced to attend many formal events at which she would be ignored by her husband. At one such event, she met a Queen named Maleficent. The woman was intriguing and befriended the younger woman. Regina would visit her often when the King was away. One night Regina went to Maleficent because the King had hit her for refusing to sleep with him. The blonde used her magic to heal the rapidly forming bruise on her friend’s cheek, and in a desperate grasp for affection, Regina kissed her.

How my character feels about yours: