#ploofy rambles

girls don’t want boys, girls want to look like a death goddess and grow their hair to their thighs but look like a fairy angel and cut off all their hair to look like a masc lesbian and have strong muscular arms and be able to do a pushup and run in heels and have long manicured fancy nails but have a chipped nail polish artist aesthetic

kinktober and inktober are out, whoretober is in

oh also when we were walking through the mall there was this little pond with a bunch of turtles and i wanted to stay and watch but she made me keep shopping :((((

throwback to yesterday when my mom and i were black friday shopping at like hollister or something, i forget what it was called, and there was a hoodie that she saw and she pointed it out me me like “hey [ploofy], look! you’d like that bc you don’t like shopping w/ me!” so I was like “ummmm” and she was like “it says i heart not moms” and i was like “mom, i hate to break it to you, but that’s not what it says. it says i heart hot moms. minor difference. but yk.” and she was just like “oop. *awkward giggle*” guys. my mom was pointing out a literal milf shirt tp me. how was i supposed to respond.

shoutout to cannoli man aka the guy at the farmers market today running the cannoli stand who heard i had never had a cannoli before and gave me one for free. i will forever owe you a cannoli my dude

guess what i found another gay. or something. there’s this girl, as far as i know, on my little brothers hockey team and i swear there’s no way she isn’t. she has the rainbow beads on her hightop laces. she has the short, dyed hair. she hangs with The Boys™. she gives off the right vibes. we haven’t even spoken. i know i’m right.

i am SICK with nostalgia and yearning

the feminine urge to scratch and bite and claw and pop and snap until you're a feral goblin everyone is too afraid to go near