#plcstics

                      ❛         i love you. i do. i just  --  i love you. and i have been trying not to say it, i have been trying so hard to just mash it down and ignore it and not say it and… jackson is a great guy. he is, he’s smart, and he’s younger than you, and he doesn’t have any grandchildren or kids with his lesbian bffs, and he’s an avery, and he liked me, you know ? he really liked me. but it was never gonna work out, because i love you. i am so in love with you. you - you . . . you’re in me. you’re like—it’s like . .  you’re a disease, it’s like i am infected by                                                              m   a   r   k           s   l   o   a   n                             and i just can’t think about anything or anybody and i can’t. . .  sleep, i can’t breathe. i can’t eat. and i love you, i - i - i love you all the time !                 every minute of every day, i love you. 

                   she’d gotten home before mark had, which wasn’t that odd of an occurrence. he was off doing some fancy procedure and she was left to her own devices, which of course meant going home, stripping down to underwear and finding one of his jerseys. it was far larger than her which meant it acted more as a dress than as a shirt, which she liked. that and it had the familiar scent of his cologne, which she also liked. 

                   the stereo was turned on and the music was cranked up (granted, she’d gotten home at around eleven and by the time she’d showered and changed - it was nearing twelve in the afternoon), hair brush was picked up and away she went; singing to her hearts content. it was one of her more favoured activities to relax after a long day at work, especially if said long day involved not a lot of standing or walking. a girl got restless !

                   as she span around on the heels of her feet, she was caught red handed with strands of hair across her face, some had gotten into her eyes and some had even managed to get into her mouth. cue her sputtering, very embarrassed and a little shyly as the brush was placed onto the counter top and fingers lightly tugged at the middle of the shirt.

“ you have the day off and i have the day off, what’s stopping us from staying in this hotel room- ” a soft smile crossed her expression as lexie propped herself up on her side. “ ordering takeout and watching dumb movies? ”

“ mark, we - uh - we - we need to talk. ” lexie was trying to keep her stuttering to a minimum. although she wasn’t quite sure if she had control over it. and she definitely couldn’t make any promises on the rambling she was sure was coming next. “ it’s - it’s important. are you busy? ”

three little words  //  accepting!  //  @plcstics!

incredulity and a sense of intense flattery at the idea of being needed   (   whether she intends to entertain the idea or not   )   wage a silent war within,  mouth sitting slightly agape as she stops in her tracks,  gaze drifting to meet his.   “you  —”   brow pinches together as addison attempts to work out a coherent sentence,   “god,  mark,  you just say that so easily,  as if you think three words are gonna make everything less  —  less complicated!”

                                                                   a  l o a d e d   q u e s t i o n ,   i s n ’ t   i t   ? 

                            she’s taken aback,     nearly tempted to gape at him like he’d said something crazy. but she retains her poise for a few moments, mostly to stare at him, mostly to panic internally. she doesn’t love alex. if she loves anyone, it’s  m a r k , it’s him, it’s always him    ( and she’s concerned it might forever be )   .  it’s mark that presides in the back of her mind, constantly showing up when she least expects, jumping to her thoughts when she doesn’t ask for it. she loves him    —     she finds it hard to believe he can’t see it in her every breath. 

                      ❛            s o,    i    ———          i got a call from . . from my dad, today.