#pheetech

Cashier: Maybe two?

Phee: No, three. My fiance's twin didn't want to let him out of the house until we agreed to take him with us.

And since those certain opinions were from an autistic perspective, I thought I'd add my own autistic perspective.

I. Love. Phee.

My cat's name is Phee. Phee is one of my top Star Wars characters. I shoved her into one of my longfics as soon as I could.

And her relationship with Tech gave me a lot of hope for my own romantic prospects as an autistic person.

I love that Phee invites Tech to be present. I love the look on his face when he watches her leave to put the artifact away. I love that she was a trusted enough person for Tech to talk to about Crosshair at length with. I love that when it's clear that Tech isn't going to give her the goodbye she expects, she backs off. I love that her love for Tech expanded into loving and helping the Bad Batch.

And even by herself she's SO COOL. She goes and finds artifacts that were stolen from cultures on Pabu and brings them back??? She is a super cool pilot??? She is ride or die for the people she cares about??? She's confident and sassy??? She has a SWORD???

Bad guy has a gun pointed at Phee: No one to save you now

Tech stuns bad guy: Are you alright darling?

Phee, kissing Tech on the cheek: Never better handsome

"We're home."

Tech felt his breath catching at the sight of Pabu. After so long, after so much hurt‐ the planet had never looked so pretty.

Still, staring at the surface, as their impending arrival grew closer and closer, Tech's bandaged hands squeezed around the yoke reflexively. He felt a trickle of nervousness sweep down his artificial spine.

Omega and Wrecker, looking battered, stared and leaned over the console with such enthusiasm, it was easy to forget what they had gone through to get here. What they had needed to fight for to make it back.

Hunter seemed to sense his anxiety, because he squeezed Tech's uninjured shoulder.

"S'okay, little one," He murmured, the term of endearment more frequently used now that he finally had his youngest brother home to hold. "We're right here."

Echo shooed their overly enthusiastic siblings away from the console, telling them to prep for landing– and make sure Crosshair wouldn't hide in the ship.

As Tech hesitated, he was given a sympathetic glance. "You also can't hide," He said softly. "But you won't need to– they're happy to have you back."

Tech wasn't sure how happy they would be once they saw him. What he had become, what he had done. His armour still clung too painfully tight to his skin, the helmet still felt attached to his aching jaw.

After so long of having it lock and stinging as it was held shut, open– and dare he try remember when he was still close enough to his brothers– caressed, Tech locking it himself was soothing in comparison.

The lengths he had needed to go to seemed so... pointless, if he couldn't even bring himself to enjoy the end result. He had his family back, his life, his home– why wasn't he happy? Why wasn't he thrusting the ship forward, hurtling down to where he knew everyone wanted to go?

He wanted to go home, too. Desperately.

He just- seemed to forget where it was. Had the coordinates wrong- everything felt wrong. His hands, his legs, his face his mind his eyes his skin oh stars his skin felt so hot and itchy and wrong—

He was jolted from him twisted mind when the landing gear engaged and they settled a bit shakily on Pabu's surface. Tech blinked, mind hazy and reality warped as he felt the soothing, warm rays of the sun on his skin.

When was the last time he had felt that?

Hunter squeezed him, turned him around in his chair. "I know this is a lot," He said, kneeling and putting his hand on Tech's arm, rubbing at the flesh there, hidden under armour. "But you're safe now. Here, with us, and.. and we'll heal. You'll be okay, Tech, I promise."

Nodding jerkily, Tech tried to pretend that he believed his brother. That he would walk out there, brave as always, and Hemlock's touch would be nothing more than a memory- rather than the oppressive, vivid phantom he felt, creeping up his spine, fingers gliding over him like a warning—

"Vodiʻka," Echo spoke now. "It's time to go."

Was it? Tech looked around again, out the port view. Omega, Wrecker and Hunter were already greeting Shep, Crosshair close by.

They looked happy. He didn't– couldn't find it in him to ruin that when he had caused so much of their suffering.

A hand smoothed through his hair. "I know," Echo whispered. "It's not easy, coming back. But you'll manage, you always do. And- I'm here, when you're ready to talk about it."

Talk about it.

Talk about Tantiss, about Hemlock. About... about what had happened to him.

Tech bit back a shiver at the thought. He couldn't imagine ever telling them what had really happened. They might not let him back in if he did.

"Let's go." Echo was pulling him, and before Tech could lose himself in the familiar haze- the comfort of do not move until he's done with you, just stay still until it's over, comply– Tech stood on the ramp, watching Pabu again.

He did not look through CX-2's lenses. Only his own.

He took a small breath, and paused. Fresh air. Tech subtlety gulped in another, greedy breath of Pabu's air. It felt so good- he had forgotten what it felt like.

He watched for a long time, wondering if any of this was his place anymore. Considering that he may be safer on the ship. At least there he could see through the rays. Maybe this was a mistake, maybe he should stay on the ship.

Maybe he should go back to Heml—

"Brown Eyes?"

Tech stilled, his whole brain shutting down again. It did that often, these days. Regressing and curling back into old routines he had used as a cadet to stay safe.

He looked up, eyes wide as he caught her eye across the courtyard.

"Phee."

She looked as beautiful as she had the night he left. She watched him, and his brother's shared a look, letting her past as she took an unsteady step towards him.

He wasn't... sure why he moved the way he had. It was similar to how he moved when he had first seen his brother's. Simply, he was overwhelmed and needed to know they were real.

So, Tech allowed his feet to carry him down the ramp, less than graciously, and he stumbled into a run as he barrelled towards Phee.

His first real connection outside their squad. Their conversations were just for them, their relationship was private- he hadn't needed to share, for once, and he loved it.

He loved her- who so kindly and fiercely lived and breathed to explore and protect what she valued. He felt warm just thinking he was on that list—

Was he- still on that list? His brain caught up to his body as he dared slow down in panic, because what if this was all just him and she would push him back, reject him like others had before? What if he truly was impossible to—

Phee crashed into him without warning, and Tech let out a choked sound as they toppled. The panicked cries of the others, the sting of his injuries against concrete was forgotten as he was enveloped, encased in Phee.

Her arms squeezed him so perfectly, just the right amount of pressure, to break his resolve and train of thought.

He hadn't even realised his arms were around her, that he was babbling, tears coming from somewhere he as heaved and sobbed into her shoulder.

He felt her tears stain him, too, as she wept and laughed into his shoulder. "I missed you," She ended up whining, smiling so wide her cheeks hurt. "You karking asshole- that's not what I meant when I said—"

Tech brightened, tears still falling with no sign of stopping. "I didn't run away with a pirate!" He interrupted, unsure of why he was so very proud of that little detail. "Just as you told me to."

Phee, still on top of him, such a comforting weight he found pulling closer to have for longer, laughed so brightly he believed his siblings earlier joy was enough to forget. He certainly could, if she kept laughing like that.

"Good job," She smiled down at him, and as she looked at him so lovingly, he finally felt as brave as he used to, and quickly leaned up, pressing an inexperienced kiss to her cheek before hugging her again.

"I– I missed you, as well," He admitted into her frozen shoulder. "More than I can say."

He felt her push him back. He paused, and in a moment of confusion, he felt his heart freeze and splinter. Of course it wouldn't be that simple- he had ruined her home, destroyed Pabu- why would he think he had any right to- to want comfort from someone he stole from?

He let out another, shakier sob, apology on the tip of his tongue as his jaw went slack, mouth open—

Only for her to catch his lips, kissing the apology away with a swipe of her tongue. "Better have," She whispered into his mouth. "Been waiting for you to do that, Brown Eyes, what took so long?"

His whole being flushed. "Ah-.." He said, floundering. Phee laughed again, sweet, and she helped them to their feet.

They stared at each other, her thumb caressing his cheek, and he leaned into the contact, the surge of adrenaline from.... everything seeping from him at her touch.

He slumped into her, completely spent. His knees knocked as his legs collapsed under him. He wished he had been given more warning as Phee let out a shout, holding him up suddenly.

He couldn't think to care- not when his brain melted under the sun and his body finally seemed to want to relax- to rest.

Stars, he needed to rest. He felt so tired..

"Tech–?!" Hunter's voice called, sharp with panic.

"M'okay," He mumbled over the gradual uptake of fear. His siblings settled, closing in around him. He felt safe, with them all there.

"Just..." He trailed off, a warm, wide smile gracing him. Maybe it was the safety he felt to feel, maybe it was the lack of sleep. His voice dropped to a whisper as he met his family's eyes over Phee's steady shoulder.

"Just... happy I'm home."