#phantomfics

Every ounce of pain, every laboured breath and tremble buried so deep and so far away from the outside world. 

The corruption had spread like a wildfire, seeping into his bones and crackling against skin. 

Sonic had always been one to fight past his limits. For the longest time his friends assumed he didn't have any.

It was easier to think like that. To look at him like an unfaltering paragon. It made the lies worth it in the end.

Lying came to him as easy as putting on a mask, a mask which had to slip and shatter eventually. 

It fell atop the highest tower piercing the sky, as he screamed into the speckled night unaware of eyes upon him.

He hadn't spoken much since they found him like that, like he was trying to wish away their peek beyond the curtain. 

His smile was strained and his laughing was forced. And it wasn't until the same corruption attacked every nerve and cell in their own bodies, that his friends realized what he'd endured the past days.

Cyberspace had meant the dulling of senses, as if they'd spent days and nights locked in a dream they were unable to wake from. 

But this was a dulling of self. Of memory, experience. Every clamber across the ancient structures was doubted, as if they couldn't trust their bodies or minds. Every step twinged with pain.

And Sonic had burned with this corruption longer than anyone. 

It became harder to ignore the blank stares, the stutters as he tried to recall their names. The danger he so willingly put himself in time and time again for their benefit. For their protection.

Sonic collapsed in the dead of night. Finding sleep for the first time since they'd arrived here. 

Rain settled among the cracks of the ancient structure, the group sheltering in the long abandoned home

“He's not going to manage much more of this.” Amy finally spoke against the silence.

Knuckles laughed.

“Glad you're here to point out the obvious.”

Her quills bristled.

"At least I'm actually concerned!” She spat. “You didn't even realize anything was wrong until we found him on that tower!”

“Neither did you.” He muttered under his breath.

“Can both of you stop?” Tails chimed in. “None of us realized.”

He sighed, glancing over to his brother. Watching as he twitched in his sleep. Even unconscious he couldn't seem to find any peace from this.

“We should have noticed. We should have done something to help him.”

Knuckles shrugged.

“Sonic's very good at keeping people out, kid. You should know that better than anyone.”

And he did. Of course he did.

From the moment they met he'd always been able to keep things from him, never letting on how bad things really were.

Always smiling and cracking jokes to hide how dire things could get.

And he'd fallen for it again.

Sonic groaned in his sleep, a shiver racking itself across his body alongside a crackle of deep red static.

For once Tails wished he would lie to him.

He watched on in confusion as she began to trace the glass with her fingers, slowly and methodically. Pouring every ounce of concentration into her movements. 

Her movements grew bigger and bolder, as tiny flowing invisible shapes grew into more elaborate patterns. A smile stretched across her face, she laughed as her reach grew further. Trying to extend herself to the highest point she could manage.

“What are you doing?” Shadow finally spoke from his doorway. 

Maria just grinned, hardly surprised or deterred by his presence.

“I'm drawing.”

“Drawing?” He repeated, making his approach to the window alongside her. “Without pencils or paper?”

“Yes!” She replied with glee. “I figured this would be a more interesting way to draw.”

She had completely lost him.

“Come here.” She said, realising his utter confusion.

She pressed his hand against the glass, before outstretching his index finger. Gently she pulled at his wrist, lining up his finger with a particularly bright star.

“Do you remember when grandfather told us about those pictures people made using the stars?”

“You mean constellations?”

“Yes, exactly! I figured I could make my own pictures in the sky just like the astronomers did!”

Maria pointed to a small bundle of stars.

“You see that one? I think that's a little rabbit. Oh! And that one-” She continued, pointing to another group of stars that just looked like another group of stars to Shadow. “That one's a giant grizzly bear! His name is Mike and he's the toughest constellation in the sky!”

Shadow raised a brow. He couldn't see a rabbit and he definitely couldn't see Mike. He thought the concept of constellations in general was a little silly, even those mapped by the old astronomers. A star is just a star, a big ball of gas thousands of miles away. The idea that any of them could form pictures seemed a little ridiculous.

“Why don't you try it Shadow? What can you see?”

Shadow swallowed. The obvious and true answer was that he couldn't see anything, because they really were just stars.

But he saw the joy in her face, the anticipation of his silly little creation.

He could at least give it a try.

“Um…I can see…a bird.” He decided noncommittally, without really looking.

She didn't seem particularly satisfied, crossing her arms and letting out a small huff.

“Let me help you.”

She took a light hold of Shadow's hand, guiding his finger between stars.

“You see this to me…” She said, curving his finger into an oval. “Looks like a leaf. Then here's the stem.”

“And this bit here…” She guided him into a larger curving shape. “Looks like the head of a flower!”

Hmm. He supposed, if he squinted and imagined really hard he could sort of see a flower. 

“Now you try.”

He stared out into space for a moment, into the black and swirling blues. Searching for the perfect set of stars, keeping his finger pressed tight against the glass.

His hand began to move with little direction, his claw scraping across the glass as he weaved in and out between the glowing specks. His motions were precise and quick, darting against the glass like a painter against canvas.

And by the time he was complete he realised he hadn't really drawn anything at all. Just strange lines across the night without rhyme or reason.

“Soo…” Maria interjected in his silence. “What did you draw?”

He sucked in a breath.

“Nothing really. Just scribbles.”

Oh this was nothing like she wanted. She must've been expecting something fun like an animal or pretty like an ocean and all he could come up with was scribbles.

Maria paused for a moment, gazing out at his invisible piece.

“Well.” She finally said. “Scribbles are art too. I think art can be whatever makes you feel good. And if scribbles make you feel good, I think your drawing looks wonderful.”

A small smile graced Shadow's muzzle, despite how silly this all was drawing in the night sky actually did feel very good.

The pair sat down, Maria gently lowering herself onto a set of pink fluffy pillows before leaning her head onto the cool glass.

It wasn't long before Shadow found himself slowly dozing off in the comfortable silence between them. Before Maria gently spoke.

“I dream of what it would be like to live on Earth a lot.” She sighed wistfully. “But sometimes I think us lucky to have a view like this, how many people dream of seeing the stars the way we do?”

Shadow nodded. 

“I suppose in that sense we are quite fortunate.” He said. “But we'll fulfill your dream soon enough.”

Maria smiled.

Tails finds himself sitting beneath a palm. Back pressed against the bark, hands pressed into the dirt. The tree casts its shadows over him as he sits in the soft grass. He pulls at the blades, tearing them from the soil.

Something shifts in the air. And his heart beats a little faster.

But everything is fine.

Because Sonic is here with him. Back pressed into the grass, eyes closed in bliss, a content smile on his face.

Who cares if he's five years too young? With a frame far too short, and eyes far too dark.

Who cares? Because they are together. And everything is fine.

He's pulling grass by the handful.

Sonic brings himself to sit. Flashing Tails a soft smile, before his gaze turns to a white glove stained green.

He raises a brow.

"Tails." He speaks. "Are you okay?"

"Yes." He replies easily, in a voice that's far too small.

Sonic sighs, and black eyes meet blue.

"You're not a very good liar."

Tails squirms under that stare. He's so sure he sees something shift in the black.

But he didn't. Everything is fine.

He brings himself to stand, stretching himself out and picking blades from his quills. Before shifting towards his younger brother, and plopping himself down beside him.

"Are you gonna tell me what's up, or are you gonna just sit there all mopey and boring?"

"It's just-" He begins in a whisper.

"Speak up." Sonic interrupts, cupping a hand around his ear dramatically. "I can't hear you." 

He shrinks in on himself, but raises his voice.

"It's just that…something feels off. Y'know?"

He gives him a flat look.

"No. I don't."

Tails takes a deep breath. Tastes that strange spring warmth again.

"Something just feels…wrong."

Sonic snickers.

"Well, that's dumb."

Two large yellow ears tilting down against his head.

He was right about this, wasn't he? He had to be.

"Oh come on." Sonic says, rolling his eyes. "You're so sensitive."

Tails recoils, twin namesakes wrapping around him. Something inside him is swirling.

His brother lets out an audible groan, before quickly tapping him on the shoulder.

"C'mon kid. Stop being so boring." He pulls himself to stand "Let's go smash some of Robotnik's dumb bots."

He followed him closely as they darted across the landscape, ripping up turf as they moved. 

Green Hill looked how he remembered it, towering rock formations, clear lakes and a cloudless sky to match. 

Exactly how it looked before it was destroyed in Eggman’s war.

Sonic lets out a cheer as he slices through a robot. Strange how it was missing the components to make it work, those details you miss in a memory.

The taste of spring is artificial, laced with recollections of how it felt years ago.

“Sonic.” 

“Yeah?”

And black eyes drown in green.

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on?”

Sonic laughs. The sound racks through Tails in an unfamiliar way.

“I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about, why are you always being so stupid?” 

“Tell me what’s happening, whoever you are.”

His blood is spiking. His body screams at him to run.

“Unbelievable, you’ve always been a bit too clever for your own good.” He smiles, adjusting the hems of his gloves nonchalantly. “I was hoping to keep you here a little longer.”

Tails holds his nerve, fighting every instinct.

Sonic meets his glare.

“I get so lonely here, all by myself.” He says. “You know what that’s like, don’t you Miles?”

“No.”

Sonic scoffs.

“Don’t lie to me, Miles. You can’t lie to me.”

The taste of spring is gone, the hyacinth spice the moistness in the air. Every quick breath he takes is tight and choking.

Sonic hasn’t breathed once.

“Little Miles Prower all alone!” He laughs. “The other kids didn’t want to play with the two tailed freak!”

Tails’ nerve is failing.

“No wonder you started following the first person who showed you a sliver of pity.” He said, coyly gesturing to himself.

He’s frozen to the spot, his full body shaking.

 “Only thing is, you never stopped following him did you?” His voice twists upwards, away from Sonic’s cool tones and into the shrill and pitchy voice of a child.

Tails can only watch as blue fur melts into yellow, emerald green eyes melting into an icy blue. As sinews seem to snap and twist into a body that reflects his own.

The landscape seems to melt alongside him, the grass beneath his feet shrivelling and dying. The skies darkening into a starless black at the death of midnight. 

“And now.” The other Tails says, with a stolen voice. “Sonic’s stuck with a little tag along who can’t think or act on his own. Who cowers in fear at the first sign of danger.”

The fox in front of him smiles, glaring at him with his own eyes.

“No wonder he thinks you’re a burden.”

With the last ounce of confidence he can muster, Tails finds it in himself to shout.

“That isn’t true!”

“His thoughts, his memories leak into my prison. I have seen my little key fight machines and gods alike. I see his life printed like writing in a book. He resents you, I promise you that.”

The reflection before him twists and breaks into something without form, its words fight between voices. Beautiful and wrong and flowing like honey.

Hours spent pacing about the workshop, projects being broken apart then rebuilt as he tried to distract his racing mind.

What if he'd been hurt? Or got stuck somewhere? Tails would have had no idea.

But of course, he'd always come back to him. Grinning and laughing as Tails' worries melted away.

Until one day, he didn't.

The day the whole world went to shit. The day that masked jackal beat him down. The day he thought he'd lost his brother.

The day that began six long months of hell.

It hurt every moment he was gone. Hours spent torturing himself with what ifs.

What if he had stood up, fought them alongside him. Defended him. What if he hadn't been so useless?

Would he still be here if he had?

And then he came back.

With duller eyes and a forced smile, refusing to tell him what had happened in those months.

He'd wave him off, or leave entirely. Promising it was nothing he needed to worry about.

He was back with his brother again. And they'd never felt further apart.

He'd go off on his own for much longer now, months at a time. Saying he needed to explore the world he'd been missing.

Tails understood. Of course he understood.

Then why did it feel so unfair?

Four months had passed, then five, then six.

What if he'd been captured again? Or worse? He could be lying in a ditch for all he knew.

He quickly shook the thought from his mind.

The next time he wandered into the workshop he was met with a barrage of questions.

Where have you been? What were you doing? Why haven't you contacted me?

Is it me?

Sonic didn't stay for long.

The next time he visited it was about the chaos emeralds. Of course, it wasn't to see him.

He explained they'd disappeared, that he couldn't sense the energy he had become so attuned to.

Next thing he knew they were heading to the Starfall Islands. Soaring through the clear blue skies with his friends, his brother perched atop the wings; staring out across the horizon.

Cyberspace was cold, unfeeling. Perhaps worse than his displacement by the hands of the Time Eater.

Something came to him there, in the familiar cybernetic landscapes void of life. A shadow of himself, no gleam in his eye or soul within.

It whispered to him, spoke of feelings he knew to be true.

That his brother didn't need him. That he never had and never will. That he'd been an unwanted tag-along since the moment they met.

A burden.

His digital prison unlocked with an explosion of light. 

He watched as his brother keeled over, body burning with red corruption.

He ran over to him, eyes wide with concern.

Sonic forced a grin.

"Just catching my breath." He said.

Tails knew a lie when he heard one. 

Especially from Sonic.

The urge to comfort his brother pulled at him, he attempted to throw his arms around him. Phasing straight through his body.

He felt further away from him still.

The events of the Starfall Islands, of Sonic's corruption and long dead secrets uncovered, felt like a distant memory now.

Sonic had predictably left the moment they returned home. And Tails couldn't shake the sinking feeling that he'd be gone for a long time.

Four months passed, then five, then six.

Then seven, then ten, then twelve.

Sonic had vanished from the face of the earth for a year.

Tails had done some adventuring of his own over that time, as he'd promised Sonic before he left.

Travelling the world and seeing the sights. Jungles and tundras and cities. Studying in Spagonia, eating ice cream in Apotos. Working on his inventions and helping out where he could. Visiting the places Sonic had used to describe in his visits.

But the world was big, and Tails was so small.

And he had never felt more alone.

In his adventures he had quietly hoped for a familiar face. A flash of blue across the landscape. An infectious grin and bright laughter.

And when that never happened, when his brother had vanished completely:

The worrying started again.

Another day spent pacing about the workshop, busying himself with his inventions to quiet his thoughts until the early hours of the morning.

He had only slept an hour when thunder clapped above the workshop, startling him awake.

Fur rising, he glanced at his clock.

3am 

His whole body trembled as he made his way downstairs, curling on the sofa and snuggling into his blanket.

This shouldn't scare him anymore. He was 14 years old, not a little kid.

And he certainly didn't miss Sonic with all his heart. Didn't need him to tuck him in and tell him everything's ok.

Wasn't worried about where he was, or what he was doing or if he was hurt.

No. He could manage by himself and wasn't angry with his brother at all.

When had he picked up his habit of lying?

He rolled over, snuggling into the cushion. But as the sky continued crashing and his mind refused to settle, he realised sleep wasn't in the cards anymore.

That's when he heard it. Banging.

At first, he thought it was thunder and hid beneath the blanket.

But when it grew more frantic, he realised it was the door.

He dragged himself off the sofa, blanket draped across his shoulders. No doubt looking a complete mess, he opened the door.

At first, he couldn't see anyone. And assumed his tired mind was playing tricks on him.

But then he looked down, and saw him.

A pit seemed to open in his stomach. And his worries were realised.

Sonic. Collapsed against the wall, clutching his middle and wincing.

His eyes were dark and lidded, ears folded against his head, bloody scratches matting his fur red. Chest rising and falling with quick, sharp breaths.

"Hey k-kiddo." He said, forcing out a chuckle. "Thought I'd swing by and…bleed all over your carpet."

Tails could feel his heart pounding through his chest.

He was at his side in an instant.

"What happened?"

"One of…Eggman's robots. Got a lucky hit in." He adjusted his position against the wall, Recoiling back down in an instant. "Or several."

"Can you walk?" 

Sonic nodded. Bracing himself up to stand on shaky legs, nearly collapsing back down if not for him falling into Tails' grasp.

He put his full weight on him. He would have been unable to support him if he was still shorter than him. He seemed to tower over him now.

When had that happened?

Sonic limped across the house, fully supported by his brother beneath his arms.

He laid him across the sofa, supporting his head with the pillow.

He disappeared from the room for a moment, returning soon after with a first aid kit.

It was hardly the first time he'd had to patch Sonic up, although this was the worst he'd seen him since-

"Sorry for showing up unannounced…like this." He breathed. "I didn't know where else t' go."

He could have gone anywhere. To Amy, or Knuckles. Maybe to a hospital for once in his life.

But no. He came here. Of course he came here.

A year of nothing. And he shows up on his doorstep bloody and bruised.

"It's fine." He lied. When did it become so easy to lie? "You were lucky I was here at all."

"Oh?" 

"I've been…travelling." He said, ripping open a pack of sterile wipes. "I've only been back for a few days."

"That's great, Tails." He hissed through the pressure against a particularly nasty cut. "Done a bit of that myself."

"Of course, you have."

The venom in his tone seemed to go over Sonic's head.

"You gonna be heading out again soon or-"

"No. I'm gonna stay here for a while."

Sonic raised a brow.

"Why's that?"

Tails sighed. And for the first time since he'd arrived, he looked his brother in the eye.

"We all have to come home sometime, Sonic."

They sat together in silence in the early hours of the morning, Tails cleaning and patching up his wounds as he drifted in and out of sleep.

It finally overcame him as the sun began to peek through the windows, bathing the room in a warm orange glow as his breathing evened out.

Tails had been watching over him like a hawk, his own eyes lidded and dark with exhaustion.

He was relieved he was safe, of course. He would be healed up in no time, injury never kept him still for long.

By the time he woke up he'd be ready to set out again.

Ready to disappear all over again.

He was relieved. He was safe. He was alive.

But then why was something pulling at him? Why was the pit in his stomach growing?

Why was he so angry?

Sonic woke up a few hours later.

He lifted himself from the sofa, stretching himself out and popping his bones.

Tails sat leaned against the wall opposite him, nursing a large mug of coffee. 

"There's breakfast for you in the kitchen." He finally spoke against the silence.

"Thanks Tails." He smiled, shifting over towards the kitchen with a very slight limp. "I'll grab this then get out of your way."

He finally felt something snap.

"That's it?" 

He slammed his mug to the floor, the hot drink pooling down the side.

Sonic raised a brow at the sudden unfamiliar tone.

"You're just gonna show up on my doorstep, then leave just like that?"

He stopped and turned, confusion crossing his features.

"Uh. I don't-" 

Tails pulled himself to his feet, storming over. He didn't know if it was the exhaustion, the constant worrying. Maybe a year of being alone had finally taken its toll.

But in that moment he'd never felt so angry.

"You were gone for a year, Sonic. A year!"

"Yeah?"

"You never called, never came to check up with me. I had no idea where you were or what you've been doing!"

Sonic frowned.

"It's not the first time I've been gone for a while."

"It's never been this long!"

He shrugged, leaning on the kitchen counter with a nonchalance that made Tails' insides burn.

"What are you getting so worked up over? I like to go off on my own and explore, you know that."

He saw red.

"Clearly your adventures are more important to you that I am!"

Sonic's eyes widened. He took a step towards him, looking up slightly to meet his furious glare.

"I never said that."

"You didn't have to."

"Look." He said, his glance to the door did not go unnoticed. "I need to travel, I need to explore. It's like a calling. That doesn't mean you aren't important to me. You're my brother, Tails."

He reached for his shoulder, a motion Tails would have found normally comforting. 

But Sonic found his hand being smacked away.

Another glance to the door. Like he was itching to get away.

He sighed, sinking into himself.

"I'm gonna go, Tails. Clearly you want some time alone."

Oh that was just like him, to run away at the first sign of conflict.

He could face machines, monsters and gods.

But would vanish as soon as feelings were brought up.

Not this time. He was going to be heard.

"I don't want to be alone! That's the problem!" 

"But you're not-"

"Why do you want to leave so badly? Is it me? Am I just a burden to you?"

"W-what, no! I told you before, of course you aren't!"

His chest heaved with each breath, eyes narrow and hands balled into fists. Wound up so tight he was sure to explode.

"Then why didn't you come back for me?!"

Sonic took a step back. Ears tilting, avoiding his burning stare.

The air felt heavy, suffocating. Laced with hurt and fury, stretching into dead silence.

"I thought." He swallowed, speaking after what felt like an eternity. "I thought I was doing you a favour."

Tails breathed out.

"You what?"

Sonic ran a hand through his quills, gritting his teeth as if this was so difficult to admit.

"On the Islands…you told me you wanted to go it alone for a while. That you didn't want to fall back on me." He sighed. "I thought that if…I stayed away for a while it would…give you that chance."

"I didn't mean I never wanted to see you. Independence doesn't mean complete abandonment."

"I know." He admitted. "I get that now. I'm sorry."

"But I was right, Tails. You did go out on your own! You did the things you wanted to do. You never needed me!"

The burning of his anger faded, washed a way in a sea of something else. And it was bubbling to the surface.

"These months have been the lonliest of my life." Something threatened to spill. "Of course I need you, I just…hoped you needed me too."

Sonic laughed. Not cruel. Not unkind. A genuine bubbly laugh, the kind Tails had been missing this past year.

"Of course I need you!" He said, placing a firm grip on his shoulders. "You're the brightest person I know, how many people can hack into a government network or create an alien translator! You're the the bravest too, you saved an entire city at 12 years old!"

"At least I'm useful."

"No." Sonic said, staring him dead in the eye. "You're more than that. You're the most important person to me. You're my best friend. My brother."

His eyes were beginning to sting.

"And if I'm honest, I've really missed you too."

And the walls came tumbling down.

Sonic nearly stumbled with the speed his brother threw his arms around him, burying wet eyes into his fur as his entire body shook.

"I can't change who I am, Tails. You know I can't stay in one place for too long. But…I'll check up with you. Make sure you're ok. And you're welcome to join me anytime."

Tails sniffed, pulling away from him.

And suddenly he was a little kid again, pleading with his hero to let him stay up just one more hour.

"Can you stay, for now."

A final glance to the door, Sonic looked at his brother and smiled.

And for a second he could pretend he was his brother, the clever little fox he'd raised and adored.

But the fox who followed him now only glowered at him. Spitting insults like venom. Who looked at him like he hadn't the faintest idea who he was.

A boy who'd grown up without him.

"Idiot, hedgehog!" Nine spat, as Sonic quickly turned a corner. Nearly slamming into him in the process.

"I'm sorry!" He defended himself. "I didn't mean to-"

"Whatever. I don't understand why the me of your dimension would want anything to do with such a fool."

Sonic's heart sank in his chest. But didn't let the hurt cross his face.

He couldn't mean it. He'd grown up alone in this world, spending the years he should have spent with him being bullied by small-minded idiots. It wasn't his fault he'd turned out this way. He was just lashing out, right?

The pair made their way through a tight alleyway, after realising the mechs following them were far too big to follow them through.

Sonic speeding through while Nine brought his metallic tails closer to his body, in order to squeeze his way past.

They came to a clearing, a quick scan of the area revealing no mechs. 

Sonic sighed, turning to the fox who had just about managed to get through the alley with his robotic extra limbs.

He looked frustrated, maybe a little embarrassed. His nose scrunching up and his ears drooping slightly.

He reminded him so much of his brother.

"Hey." Sonic broached gently. "You ok, kid?"

Nine glared at him.

"I'm not a kid!"

Sonic had to bite back a chuckle, the moody little fox sure looked like one.

Nine stiffened at this, fur puffing in his embarrassment.

"And I am certainly not your brother."

Sonic stopped laughing.

His face grew more serious.

"I…I know Nine. Sorry. I didn't mean to-"

Nine quickly drowned out his worthless apology, ears flicking towards a strange humming sound. Which seemed to be getting closer.

Blue eyes widened as a mech it tore its way into the clearing, already damaged and struggling to stay upright from a previous encounter.

Its weapon was charged and buzzing with energy. And was aimed at an oblivious Sonic's back.

Without so much as thinking, Nine extended his mechanical limbs. Panic flashed across the others face for a second, realising he was being cocooned alongside the fox in his strange tails.

Something hit the makeshift shield, both hearing the energy dissipate against metal. Moments later, something seemed to clunk to the ground outside. And Nine very quickly released him from his cover.

Sonic's eyes quickly fell onto the mech, now nothing more than a sparking hunk of metal. Raising a brow once it's weapon rolled out of it's hands.

He turned to face Nine, who seemed to have only just recovered his breathing.

"You…you saved me."

He straightened his posture, attempting to give off an air of disinterest.

"Obviously."

"Guess you actually do care about me, huh?"

Nine scoffed.

"Of course I don't. But there's someone in your dimension who actually does. And apparently he'd be upset if you weren't around."

Sonic sighed.