#peteploszek

I’m surprised Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows wasn't as successful as the first. It’s no better or worse than the first. If you’re a fan of the characters it brings some of your favorites to the big screen for the first time. Is it a good movie? I can't say yes, but I would consider it a passable way to entertain children... for what that's worth.

One year after the defeat of Shredder (Brian Tee), Leonardo (Pete Plozek), Donatello (Jeremy Howard), Raphael (Alan Ritchson), and Michelangelo (Noel Fisher) lament the need to remain hidden from the world. Then, scientist Baxter Stockman (Tyler Perry) helps the turtles' arch-enemy escape and provides for him two mutated goons: Bebop (Gary Anthony Williams) and Rocksteady (Stephen Farrelly). When you throw the alien world-conqueror Krang (Brad Garrett) in the mix, our heroes and their ally April O’Neil (Megan Fox) face their toughest challenge yet.

For fans of the franchise, this sequel offers a lot. Shredder is back (and he's ditched the mechanical armor, meaning he’s more in line with the television model). Along comes the other big bad: Krang. He's pretty cool, though you might be disappointed to hear his voice, which is completely different from the one you're accustomed to. You also get Baxter Stockman, Bebop, Rocksteady, and even Casey Jones (Stephen Amell) in a major role. There are some good action scenes, particularly between our heroes and Krang. The effects that bring these to life are better than they were in 2014 so it's not like there isn't anything to look forward to.

If you’re not a fan, you'll be disappointed. The story is not great. Upon meeting an extra-dimensional ball of chewed-up gum operating a hulking android, Shredder doesn’t bat an eye and immediately accepts to partake in global domination. You know it's only a matter of time before someone betrays someone else. Needless to say, the writing is not one of this film's strengths. The jokes are more likely to make you roll your eyes than laugh and the science makes absolutely no sense - even for a film revolving around genetically-altered sewer-dwellers.

The problem is that while the fans of this series have grown up, the characters haven't. The film does not aspire to please anyone BUT children and fanatics of Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird's creations. If a sequel or reboot does come around, it needs to be a lot smarter, or funnier. You can make great-looking characters and dizzying action sequences. The technology is there as long as you fork over the money. Now focus on making these characters worthy of the effects behind them.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows  isn't worth a canister of glowing ooze to anyone that isn’t already committed to liking it. Though not painful to sit through, I won't remember this film down the line and have no desire to revisit it anytime soon. My bet is you'll feel the same. (Theatrical version on the big screen, February 25, 2017)