#personal starr

I just need to get my thoughts in order cause I'm kinda floundering...

I lucked out that I had work thru the worst of the strikes as kids television doesn't have much need for writers (Har har)... but my contract ends in three weeks. The work is now being sent to 3rd party over seas studios.... which is a disturbing and frequent trend in the animation industry...

In May DreamWorks laid off 33 folks, they just laid off another 70. This is over 4% of their LA team. I have friends and colleagues who have been effected. The industry is going to be flooded with folks looking for work and there are less and less jobs...

I knew this field was going to be tough when I got into it... but fuck it just keeps feeling like it's getting worse and worse....

And honestly... I'm scared. Scared I'm not talented enough to stand out against all the talented humans all in need of work. I'm scared cause.... honestly... I have no idea what else I could do anymore.

It's so expensive to live out here, but here is where the jobs are. But now there are even less jobs. And it's still so expensive. We're being priced outta our apartment already, and struggling to find anything affordable and I just wanna break down and fall apart.

I know part of this deep hopeless pit is cause of the doom scrolling, exhaustion, and my monthly monster.... but fuck man

This is the most attention my work and store has even gotten and I am so grateful to every single one of you who have supported me, commented on my posts, purchased my work, reblogged it, kofi donations, and left keyboard smash messages.

I got crap news this week that my contract ends in October and with the strikes -work is extremely hard to come by in my adjacent field of CG. Not having the next step planned has been immensely stressful, so this boost in moral has done more than I think I could explain right now... so thank you. From the bottom of my space dusted heart.