#periodssuck

Being unhealthy sucks, but being unhealthy and having doctors literally look you in the face and tell you, “you’re crazy”, is even worse. 

I’d like to start this by saying at this current point in 2020 I have finally been diagnosed with Endometriosis (Even tho you don’t know if you 100% have Endo unless you get surgery and surgery can actually make endo worse so this is basically my current doctors best guess). It is how we finally came to the Endometriosis diagnosis that's the real story. 

Like I said in my first post, I've had health issues for a long time and a lot of those health issues were based around my lower half; Super bad periods, irregular periods, horrible cramps, bad back aches, getting super sick the week before my period, having bladder issues (basically feeling like I have to pee ALL THE TIME) but literally having no bladder infection what so ever, feeling super nauseous before, during and after my period, always just not feeling right hormonally and basically only having one week out of the whole moth where I would feel “normal”. 

Time and time again I would go to my GYN and tell them all the symptoms I was having, they would do all the tests (blood work, hormone panels, possible STD testing even tho that was pretty much impossible since I was dating my now Fiancé at the time, Pap testing) and all the tests would come back normal. They’d send me home with some breathing exercises, try to push me to get on birth control (which i’ve tried before and it actually turns me into a crazy person) and told me to my face that this was most likely my anxiety and all in my head. After my GYN not being able to give me any answers I tried going to a woman hormone specialist in Ardmore PA and literally the same thing happened all over again.....a whole bunch of the same test and no results. After the hormone specialist I tried acupuncture to try and just get my body to level out because acupuncture has worked for me in the past (I used to get horrible headaches and acupuncture healed me so I'm definitely not knocking it) and even tho it gave me a sense of calmness in my mind my body was still suffering every month. 

A year goes by after not getting any diagnosis and I basically start to fall into the “silent sufferer” category of people. I started to try and ignore my symptoms, stopped talking about them with my family and fiancé, got so tired of doctors not being able to help and just got to a point where I truly believed this was just my life now....a never ending saga of horrible periods, always feeling like there was someone sitting on my bladder, the never ending mood swings and just an overall feeling of “blah”. So what changed? What made me keep seeking help? Basically hitting rock bottom one night in the summer of 2020. I remember it like it was yesterday. I was having such a rough night, I think the worst night i’ve had since all my symptoms started, and was in so much discomfort that I couldn't sleep and ended up sobbing into my sea of fuzzy blankets on my living room floor trying to find some sense of relief. I was sick of being sick. I was sick of being told I wasn’t sick when I knew I was. 

I went back to my GYN that day because I called the office early that morning crying hysterically to the poor receptionist and she somehow got me into the office that morning. The GYN I saw was a woman I had never seen before, which in a way gave me some hope. I broke down crying to her telling her about all the shit I was going through physically and emotionally. I told her about all the other doctors who told me that this was all in my head and I told her about every little symptom I had in extreme detail. I told her I didn't want to leave another appointment without some sense of direction or actual help...and you know what? she actually listened to me. Even tho she herself couldn’t come up with a diagnosis she gave me the number of an all woman's physical therapy group in Narberth PA who focused on Pelvic floor pain, bladder discomfort and painful periods. I knew that there were pelvic floor physical therapists but I never really thought that was what I needed. For the first time in a long time I felt a sense of hope and actual guidance from a medical professional. 

I’m on my period (I know, TMI, but here me out), I’m cramping, I’m bloating, I’ve got backaches like you wouldn’t believe and I am DYING for some Cafe Rio, but my honey and I can’t afford it rn...I may or may not have cried about this, being the hormonal, emotional wreck that I am.