Virgil is Thomas’ anxiety. We all know what Anxiety is from Taking on ANXIETY with Lilly Singh!!, My NEGATIVE Thinking, and ACCEPTING ANXIETY parts I and II.  We know that Anxiety can arise at any time, with or without ‘just’ cause. We know that Anxiety is capable of reasoning to conclusions, baiting the other sides and Thomas.  Virgil, in that he does not only represent his heightend anxiety, is also Thomas’ fight or flight response and at least a portion of his self preservation. “I’ve always aimed to protect you.”

So we know how Virgil works and what he represents. Lets delve into what he does in the intro. 

Virgil starts walking past the camera, notices it, smirks, and comes back to stand centered on screen. “Is your door locked?  Did you leave the stove on? What do you think people say about you when you leave the room?” While speaking Virgil’s body language gets progressively less relaxed and more intimidating. Thomas calls him out on it from off screen. “Virgil! Uh uh, I know you are not giving other people anxiety. You are my Anxiety, no one else’s.” Thomas comes onscreen, clearly unhappy with Virgil’s behavior. Virgil looks skyward and walks off camera and Thomas takes his place center screen. “Trifiling Ass-ailant of my emotions.” Thomas addresses the audience, “Sorry, he’s still bummed that I went back to brown hair.” He then addresses Virgil who is still off screen “I said I might dye it again soon.” 

Which brings us back to the beginning of this weird post. Why the heck did this Tumblr cryptid/occasional writer get platonic heart flutters over this exchange?  Well, motive. What is Virgil’s motive for giving Thomas’ audience anxiety?

According to Thomas, Virgil is acting out to spite Thomas because Thomas didn’t dye his hair purple again. That’s text. What about subtext? There are a lot of things Virgil could do to Thomas in retaliation for his neutral hair, he didn’t need to involve the audience. So why did Virgil, who acts in Thomas’ self interest as a protector choose to speak directly to the audience?  Virgil is a complex character and likely had more than one motive for his actions. Yes, part of that may have been taking advantage of the camera set up to get back at Thomas about the hair argument they were apparently having, but there is more to it. Virgil chose to ask the audience about their doors, their stoves, and their friends. It was a reminder to check those things, is your home safe? Are your friends trustworthy? But why check on us, Thomas’ (and the sides’) fans.

Because Thomas, and by extent, Virgil, cares about his viewers (this is where platonic flutters come in). Virgil voices his concerns to keep Thomas safe, so turning those concerns on the viewer is a way to keep them safe. 

I get that the character Thomas portrayed by actual Thomas in Sanders Sides is fictional and so are his sides, Logan, Roman, Patton, Virgil, etc. But how many times do we, as fans, get to hear that the characters we love care about us?  It’s a pretty rare occurrence and one that I treasure. 

Our first Side Stop (I think I’m clever, let me have this) is Patton, the Mayor of Muchkinland.  He’s been struggling lately with his perception of Thomas as a perfectly good person and the appearance of Remus and the conflict between the wedding and the callback. As Patton explains at the end of the episode, he’s been struggling to do his job as Thomas got older. He’s gone overboard and hurt Thomas with his overzealous enforcement of ideals. Now he’s trying to reign himself in, back off while still doing his job and that balancing act is no easy thing.  

He’s trying not to force Thomas while still steering him on the right path.  He’s trying to listen to and respect Roman when he disagrees adamantly with him.  He’s trying and he’s out of his element. Can Lying Be Good showed that while Patton has a lot of feelings about right and wrong he has very limited knowledge of philosophy (if any at all).  All the philosophical arguments made (unknowingly) by Roman and Patton during the episode could have gone smoother if they had the precedent of arguments for and against different normative ethical theories. 

Next Side stop, our very own gay Disney prince, Roman. 

Roman has been making a lot of effort lately.  He’s trying to be nicer to Logan, a threat to his popularity.  He’s trying to be nicer to Virgil, the first ‘dark side’ he encountered on the show.  He’s making an honest effort to be better for Thomas and not put his dreams/desires/goals first all the time (see Thomas’ sentence in Selfishness v. Selflessness).

He said he was the most important side in Learning New Things About Ourselves and now he’s willing to give up more control and give it to Patton because he believes that that is what Patton and Thomas need to be a better person.  That’s a huge sacrifice for him, on the heels of sacrificing the callback to attend Lee and Mary Lee’s wedding. 

 Roman is still by no means blameless in this video, but he's been trying a lot harder. And then laughing at Janus, far from his best moment. It was petty and cruel, but Janus had it handled. He's a snake and he struck Roman where it hurt. Thomas or Patton could have said something to Roman about crossing a line, could have addressed it immediately in a way that made it clear that they support Roman if not his actions. Their silence shut Roman down hard.  

Roman is supposed to be a 'hero'. A hero needs a villain. At first it was Virgil, then Logan, recently Deceit. Now Janus is getting 'a seat at the table' and I can't imagine how Roman sees that. Like he's been defeated and each of his 'villains' has triumphed over him? He's losing his narrative and that has got to sting.

And the little nod Janus gives Roman when Thomas confirms Roman is his hero, Roman takes that as confirmation Thomas is lying to him. And Patton says 'we love you' and again, Roman doesn't believe him because Deceit has a seat at the table now.

And here we are at our third stop, who could forget Logan and his Lowdowns?

The whole episode Logan is trying to be less invasive, less in their face, but he still has a job to do. He's trying to provide relevant facts to support the emotions playing out. Support! He's not hurrying them to a predetermined conclusion. He's not ignoring them or viewing their contributions as unimportant, he knows better now.

Patton immediately calls him 'optional'. And Roman chooses ignorance, pushing Logan's button without hesitation or remorse. Thomas interrupts him. So Logan tries to present his information silently, which also doesn't go well.

When he has 'too much' to say Roman cuts him off, very literally, and the only one Thomas expresses concern about is Patton.

Patton calls on him, finally asking Logan for his input, and Patton skips him because he doesn't like what Logan is saying. He devalues Logan's contribution "Well, you can't really learn how to take care of others from a book" and Logan is kidnapped by Deceit.

And then, oh dear, when Logan comes back Deceit immediately curses, making his displeasure at Logan's arrival known. "Not that any of you care". Logan is Thomas’ logic. He's known for stating facts and he believes the other sides and Thomas don't care about him

"Then I will do you all a favor and spare you my company." Even in the face of what Logan believes is their apathy, he still cares about them.  Knows his presence is unwelcome and is willing to leave them alone. He gives his very helpful information before taking his leave, unthanked, unappreciated, and does not return.

Which brings us to Janus

Janus, who’s been slow to join them, slow to drop the 'I'm the scary bad guy' persona. He shows his vulnerability, his name, and is immediately attacked for it. And how he handled it, lashing out? That response was far too quick to be incidental. He's had to defend himself before. He's been hurt before.  

The overwhelmingly positive response when he gets Thomas to repeat that, for once, Thomas thinks Janus is right?  He’s been starved for validation and approval from the person he exists to serve.  And he needed Thomas to say it twice, not because he didn’t hear the first time (I’m not buying that) but because he needed confirmation that Thomas meant it.  This may be a moment he never thought he’d get to have.

And consider this, all of Thomas's sides in this episode are hurt in one way or another. Patton is confused and at a loss for how to keep Thomas on 'Santa's nice list". Janus makes himself vulnerable and is attacked. Roman is trying so hard to be better and still doesn't get the good ending. Logan is ignored and neglected. If four out of six of Thomas' known sides are hurting, how must Thomas feel?

Welcome to Painville and thank you for joining me on the Thomas Sanders Sides Angst Express. Enjoy your stay and your complimentary tissues.