#penthouse antics

Sophie was weird when I first met her. She talks like a robot.

But she’s actually pretty cool! And her hair is so long and soft and pretty! I like braiding it!

Elle is very kind. I also enjoy playing with Rollo. His paw pads are very soft.

I have also told her and her father about royal crablettes. He says he is going to make them for dinner tonight.

Be sure to save some for Rollo!

Hey, the Amarcians are totally human! Just 'cuz we're a different race doesn't mean we're a different species!

Well, you are technically the descendants of aliens...

And replicas of humans are human too...

I'm not sure why any of that matters, as you're all still inferior beings!

"As things stand presently, no. It has rather... exact specifications."

"What does that even mean?"

"Simply that one has to meet a certain level of criteria before I purposefully avoid them, like those that Leia's mother present."

"If you mean you don't like scary ladies, I can think of one you should put on that list."

"While I'm certain you mean well, Elle, I don't believe you should--"

"Lloyd Irving, you will get back there this instant, even if you force me to drag you back myself!"

"Wait, Professor Sage! No! NOOOOO!"

"Well, this is just speculation, but... that arte seems to have a pretty strong tie to Volt in other worlds from what I've heard. Since we didn't actually have Volt as an active Great Spirit in our world until recently, that might be why we haven't developed it as a useable arte?"

"A fair hypothesis. Developing new spirit artes, especially powerful ones like that, require a great deal of time and mana, as well as a thorough understanding of the element involved. Since Volt is a Great Spirit that's only recently been reawakened, I imagine it will be some time before anyone can create anything resembling such an arte."

"Oh, I'd be more than happy to lend my expertise on the matter. I'm sure throwing a few around at the researchers involved will do wonders for progress."

"Can we maybe try not turning our scientists into ash?!"

"I was pumped about it! After all, any chance to give all my gorgeous hunnies more of what they want is a good one, right?"

"But, I admit, I kinda had my doubts about teaming up with an old guy, but he's not so bad."

"Well, I admit I'm not normally one for throwing myself under the spotlight, but when an opportunity to highlight such a wonderful talent presents itself, I simply can't turn it away."

"You never said anything like that before."

"Haven't I? Well, allow me to tell you your ability to entertain me with your feats of shameless buffoonery are second to none, and I can be a rather tough critic. You should be proud."

Well, I wouldn't exactly be doing experiments on him, as my days of scientific research on living test subjects are behind me.

That being said, I can't guarantee he won't find a stink bomb or five in his shoes next week.

I think I finally got the formula down for my Super Ultra Hair Growth Shampoo, maybe he wouldn't mind trying that out?

I could ask. I'm sure he wouldn't mind if I told him it was for a good cause.