Welcome to the bard party, where the cool kids hang out
The Gangâ„¢
Felben: Exclusively sings Mongolian throat music accompanied by hang drum and/or windchimes. Wears the hang on his back like a turtle for +1 to AC. Specializes in divination, healing, and dimensional spells. Smokes weed.
Rikash: Multiclasses as a monk literally only so that she can dance better (spoiler alert: she dances Hella Good). What sort of dance? All dance. Russian soldier dancing? Traditional Georgian dancing? The fucking polka? She’s got that shit on lock. She meets up with her step-dancing group on Wednesdays when the moon is waning. Also, she’s the best drummer, period. Specializes in evocation and intimidation-based spells. Uses an ironshod quarterstaff that may or may not have a lead core (at any rate, it fucks people up real good).
Pelliwen Piper: No one’s really sure when she showed up, why she’s here, or really what she looks like. She doesn’t talk, and she’s about three feet tall. She might be Fae. No one wants to ask. At any rate, her name doesn’t lie (which is solid evidence against her being Fae, actually). She keeps her pipes inside a trench coat at least six sizes too big that she’s never (to anyone’s knowledge) taken off. And she’s got them all. Pan pipes, wood flute, recorder, slide whistles, the works. One time, she reached into the trench coat and produced a bagpipe and after that, everyone stopped asking about the coat. They’re all pretty sure she could haul out a full church organ if given enough time. Specializes in illusions and evocations that are basically illusions (like faerie fire and dancing lights).Â
Billiam: Not his real name. Fantasy Linkin Park stan. Proto-emo. Nobody Understandsâ„¢. I think he might play bass but he’s really trying to get this whole lead singer thing going. Specializes in conjuration and necromancy, because Of Course He Fucking Does. Also uses a scythe.Â
His Majesty aka Charles Anton Mariner III: The Orator. Ran away from his noble family to play jazz. Kind of sucks, actually?? Can play the saxophone fairly mediocrely. Actual bardic skill lies in making speeches and telling stories (mostly the former, bc his stories aren’t that interesting). Continuously tries to deny that fact, because he’s Not Like His Father. As such, makes attempts to start a jazzy jam sesh in every town they hit. Also tries to get people to call him Chaz. Consistently fails at both (though he does get called variations of Prescott, Willoughby, and Thurston). Specializes in enchantment and transmutation, and uses a sword (rather well, though only when he has to-- he was trained in his father’s court)
Elsie: Poetry lesbian. Also plays guitar and ukulele. Dances like Lorde. Will braid ur hair. Mom friend, but like if your mom is 22-year-old Luna Lovegood. Always has mints and hand lotion. Pure™. Comes to Rikash’s step-dance Wednesdays to watch, and sometimes calls His Majesty Chaz to to make him feel better. For some reason she and Pelliwen are bros?? They’ve worked something out. Uses a bow and arrow. Probably dating Rikash but they’re chill about it. Specializes in enchantment, abjuration, and healing.
These mismatched fuckers met because they’re in the same dorm building (they assume Pelliwen lives in the kitchen because nobody’s allowed to put anything on the bottom level of the fridge and she’s not actually on the roster. they checked). I’m not sure why they decided to leave college-- maybe they graduated, maybe it got too boring, maybe they heard about the oppressive regime of Capitalism (a dragon) in a desert city not too far from where Rikash has family, but at any rate, they’re off adventuring, leaving scores of terrorized deer and parents rethinking higher education in their path.











