#patchwork.thirsts

Basically it begins like an archetypal fantasy story - a dragon attacks a kingdom and takes the princess hostage. Eventually a brave hero turns up, defeats the dragon in an epic battle. As a reward, the hero is granted the princess' hand in marriage, not to mention an abundance of gold.

...EXCEPT, the entire thing is a ploy orchestrated by the princess, the dragon and the hero - who are actually in a polyamorous relationship - working together to get what they want.

The hero and the princess were childhood friends and loved each other but were forbidden from being together because the hero was born a commoner. At some point they made friends with the dragon, (who is actually not a "true" dragon but can shapeshift between a draconic or humanoid form). Perhaps they find the dragon wounded in the wilderness, and work together to nurse them back to health.

The romance between the three of them gradually blooms, but they can never hope to be together. A princess, a commoner, and a dragon - society would never allow it! Unless... they figured out a way to trick them.

The dragon attacks the kingdom and "kidnaps" the princess, the hero turns up and "defeats" the dragon (using some bullshit chosen one powers that they totally made up), forcing it to retreat. As a reward, king grant the hero the princess' hand in marriage, and a castle to live in. They pull some strings to slip the dragon (in human form) into the castle. In the coming months, nobody notices on the hooded stranger who quietly slips into the newly-betrothed couple's bedchambers...

And perhaps in a few years the dragon will come back for its "revenge". After all, they all rather enjoyed the theatrics of it, and these stories are always better with a sequel, right?

middle of the evening: damn my best friends are actually looking super fuckin hot rn

if, for example, a beautiful lady were sitting in front of me on a throne, and she commanded me in a stern voice to kneel in front of her and kiss her feet... and then once i did that she chuckled darkly and called me a good girl for being so obedient and knowing my place beneath her... and maybe if once i looked up at her with wide eyes and a blush on my cheeks and she told me that i'd better keep going since i'm clearly enjoying it so much... that would be nice i think.

a short upturned snout with a big nose ring.

eyes that are small and deep set, yet keen and expressive.

huge curving tusks, decorated with ornate cuffs.

rough, thick-fingered hands easily twice as large as a human's.

legs ending in cloven hooves.

covered in big swathes of thick, dark hair. furred legs, hairy chest, long locks and a big beard, and a happy trail you could get lost in...

a lil tail with a tuft on the end.

rougher skin on their back and shoulders, almost like a natural armour, but much smoother and softer on the chest, stomach, and thighs.

and of course, BIG and FAT. i'm talking significantly taller than most humans, big belly, fat rolls around the arms and hips.

i think i may have to put a pin in this and write something longer about it later, because right now i'm imagining a group of this type of orc passing me around as free stress relief.