Curtains Closed
Summary:
Warnings: Heartbreaking angst I’m so sorry, cursing but I think that’s everything
Author’s Note: I am so sorry this is so sad fhskghs but i loved writing this request !! Please send me any more that you may be thinking of and I’ll do my best
The set is bustling by the time you get there, crew and cast dotted around everywhere all preparing to film and refilm scenes. This was the first time that you’d been able to make the visit, and yet Drew had been filming here for at least a month. It was a new film he was working on, but with you filming recently too, it felt like your paths just weren’t crossing.
“Hey (Y/N)!” One of the assistants smiles when she sees you, “His trailer is just over there.”
You thank her and turn in the direction of Drew’s trailer, where his character’s name is printed on a sheet of paper in the window. You knock and wait, almost nervously, for the door to open. You always felt nervous when you went weeks without seeing him properly, even a year into your relationship, that hadn’t changed.
It takes a few seconds before he comes to the door, swinging it open exaggeratively. His hair is messy and his top splashed with patches of water, a grin on his face.
“Hey baby!” Drew grins, though the moment stops quickly when he’s shot at with another spray of water, “You bitch!”
Your heart feels like it sinks for just a second, enough for you to notice. He hadn’t thought to kiss you when he saw you, not even reach out and wrap you in his arms.
“Sorry, sorry, come in,” He encourages, stepping out of the way for you to step through.
In the trailer, he’s joined by his costar, who you knew was called Emily. She was a beautiful girl, being a model before she’d become an actress, and she played his love interest in the film.
“Hey, you must be (Y/N) right?” Emily grins, holding a water gun in her hand that is still pointed at Drew.
“Yeah, it’s nice to meet you Emily.”
She doesn’t respond to you, instead squealing as Drew shoots her back, spraying her hair on either side of her face.
“So, how’s filming going?” You ask, sitting on the sofa across from Emily.
When Drew sits down, he takes the seat next to her.
“It’s good,” Drew nods, “We finished pretty early today, always easy doing scenes with Emily, you know?”
“Yeah, of course,” Emily grins, “We’re like a dream team on set.”
Your words seem to fail you, and you’re not sure why your chest feels so tight. This was stupid, right? They worked together, they were friends, it was good that Drew was working with someone that he got on well with. But that’s how it was when you two first got together, and part of you felt a sinking feeling that your instincts hadn’t failed you here.
“So where were you thinking of going tonight?” Drew asks, kicking his feet up onto the coffee table between the two couches.
You swallow the lump in your throat to respond but Emily cuts in quickly.
“Ooh why don’t you go to that Thai place we went to?” She suggests, and you’re sure that she has shuffled closer to Drew on the sofa.
“Yeah, we could do, it was so good,” Drew nods, “Me and Em went last week, I don’t think I’ve ever eaten so much in my life.”
The lump is back in your throat, “Yeah, sure, whatever you fancy.”
~~~
That night, you and Drew decided to order food in instead of going out, after you’d told him that you didn’t feel well. He’d eaten three slices of your pizza when you told him that you couldn’t finish it. And he had believed you when you told him there was nothing else that was wrong.
You were both in the kitchen now, washing up the plates you’d used for your food.
“So, Emily seems nice,” You nod, dragging the kitchen towel over your plate.
“Yeah, she’s great, right?” Drew smiles, “We just have such a laugh on set, genuinely I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so much.”
You felt like you could cry in that moment, not just from that comment but from the way his eyes seemed so bright when he spoke about her, the way you felt like his eyes hadn’t been on yours as much as normal.
He hands you the last plate and shakes his hands off into the water, taking one side of the towel in your hands to dry his off.
“Hey,” He takes it out of your hands and sets it down, wrapping his arms around your waist, “It’s good to properly see you again.”
You force yourself to smile, setting a hand on his chest.
“I mean it, I feel like we’ve both been way too busy recently,” He nods, “It’s good for us to have days like this.”
You still can’t force your body to bring out any words, just looking at the boy in front of you like you’d never seen him before.
“Hey?” Drew dips his tall figure down to try and catch your eyes, “This is good, right?”
“Yeah, yeah, of course,” You smile and he kisses your cheek, releasing his arms from around you.
Your heart feels heavy and empty all at once, your mind running a thousand thoughts and thinking of nothing at all. When he walks off to disappear into the lounge, you feel like a part of you disappears with him.
~~~
That night, you both get ready for bed like you normally do. You brush your teeth together and he goes into the bedroom whilst you’re washing your face. It’s all the routine that you’re used to, and when you shut off the ensuite light, he’s already sat propped up against the headboard, scrolling through his phone. You’re still wearing one of his tops to bed, another piece of normality that it felt comforting to keep.
“Drew, can I ask you something?” You ask cautiously, hovering by the side of the bed like you’re worried about getting in.
“Sure, what is it?” He shuts off his phone screen and puts it on the bedside table.
“Do you think things are still the same between us when we don’t see each other as much? You know, like when we’re both so busy?”
You watch the way his face drops a little, “What are you talking about?”
“I mean… we’ve just both been so busy recently.”
“Yeah, and we make it work,” He continues, “We still text, we call, and it’s only been a few weeks, we’ve done worse.”
You drag a hand through your hair, pulling out one of the tangles to distract yourself, “I don’t-“
“What is this (Y/N)?” He shakes his head, “Is there something you need to tell me?”
“I just,” You take a deep breath, if you don’t say it now you never will, “I saw you with Emily today and I-“
“This is about Emily?” He sits up straighter, “Are you kidding?”
“Why didn’t you tell me that you two went to dinner together?”
His words fail him and it’s like you can see the confidence crumble just a little, “I don’t-“
“Is it because you knew that it would look weird? For you two to just be going out together?” You continue, a new sense of confidence fuelling your words, “If you didn’t think it was weird, you would’ve told me. We talk everyday Drew. What excuse did you come out with?Or did you just hope that I wouldn’t ask?”
“I just told you I was going out with the cast, it was last Friday,” He admits, as if he’s just been caught in the act completely.
Your heart sinks, “So you lied to me.”
“I didn’t lie to you, I mean, it wasn’t like that,” He scrambles, standing up now so that both of you were on either side of the bed now, too much and too little space between you all at once, “I just knew how you’d think it looked, and we hadn’t seen each other in a couple of weeks, and you were busy with work, and I just didn’t want you to worry.”
“So I’m busy working, and you’re out on dates with a girl I hadn’t even met before?!”
“No, no, no, don’t be like that!” He seems more aggressive now, “It wasn’t a fucking date, okay? We’re friends.”
“Friends? Because she’s just so funny, and you’re fighting in your trailer, and you’re sat next to her, and you’re doing everything with her?”
“I’m sat next to her?” He half-laughs, “So you’re noting down where I sit now?”
“But it’s not just that, is it, Drew? I haven’t seen you in weeks and you didn’t even care! It could’ve been anyone walking through the door and you’d have had the same reaction! It’s like I was fucking interrupting!” You are waving your arms around as you speak, the way Drew knew you only did when you were getting angrier.
“You weren’t fucking interrupting,” He shakes his head, “But if you don’t trust me in that then maybe this is more of an issue than just Emily. What else, (Y/N)?”
You look at him there, his features darkened by the lack of light in your bedroom. He’s more toned than ever for this role, the muscles of his abs dipping in and out of his stomach and casting small shadows over his torso, his arms larger and his shoulders broader. If you looked for long enough, it felt like he was completely different. But his eyes were still yours, in the way they creased when you made him laugh, and the way his dimples hooked either side of his lips when he saw you happy. But this time it felt tainted, your mind overloading with thoughts of him giving the same eyes, the same smile, the same dimples to her.
“I don’t know if I can do this, Drew,” You whisper the words, uncertain of how they’ll sit in the air between you.
“What does that mean?” He shakes his head, the fury in him settling down into worry.
You’re silent, complete silence between the two of you.
“Let’s just go to bed, okay? We’re just tired,” Drew states, convincing himself along with you, “We’re not thinking straight, this isn’t us. Let’s just go to sleep, and we’ll wake up, and we’ll be fine, okay?”
You don’t reply.
“I’m sorry for raising my voice, okay?”
“Okay,” You croak out, your eyes threatening to spill unforgiving tears.
He takes a deep breath and gets back into bed, pulling down the sheets on your side. You follow suit, climbing in beside him and pulling the sheets high up over you as if a shield from the argument that still lingered in the air. Drew dips an arm beneath your back and pulls you into him, another piece of normality he seemed reluctant to give up. His body is warm but it feels too warm beneath your skin, burning into you just a little. His chest rises and falls but it’s not in the same rhythm, his heart slowing down as yours still felt like it was racing.
Eventually, you’re sure that he has fallen asleep, and you stay awake for far too much time after, your eyes staring at the closed curtains on the other side of the room, willing for the light to come through.
~~~
The following morning, you’re awake before he is, though you’re sure that you hadn’t had more than a couple of hours sleep the night before.
It’s cold in the apartment, like an air of the inevitable had settled over everything that the two of you had. When Drew wakes up, you’re sat with your feet and knees tucked up to you on the sofa, your hands around yourself.
“Morning,” He says, his voice still sleepy and thick, joggers hanging low on his hips, forcing the V-line of his torso to poke out.
You look up and offer him a small smile, the biggest that your lack of energy can muster.
“Did you sleep okay?”
He regrets the question almost as soon as it is said, as if he’d just asked you the worst thing possible in the moment. Instead, he walks over the short distance to you and sits down, close to you on the sofa like he wants to draw you into him.
“Listen, (Y/N),” He begins, “I know things aren’t ideal. We’re both busy, we’re working in different places, different hours, and it’s not going to end any time soon. But we can make this work, okay? We can change things. I’m going to tell you everything, I’m not going to lie to you, I’ll make sure I have more days off and I can come and visit you, and we can facetime more instead of just calling,” He pauses to take a breath, “We can fight for this (Y/N).”
“I don’t know how much longer I can just keep fighting, Drew,” Your voice is croaky, threatening to break.
“But this is us, baby, we can’t lose this,” He sits himself closer to you, though avoiding contact like he is afraid you’ll shatter in front of his eyes.
“Drew, listen,” You let yourself breathe for a moment, “This has worked for us, it has. We’ve always made it work. But, right now, it doesn’t feel like that anymore. We’re in different places, and this time it was only weeks, next time it might be a couple of months. You’ll go on press for the film, I’ll be here. I don’t know how much we can keep doing that.”
“We can try, can’t we?”
“I’ve never seen you with anyone and felt the way I did yesterday, I saw you with Emily and I felt like a completely different person, like I was this jealous and overthinking version of myself, and I don’t want to be that. I don’t want to see you after weeks and just argue with you,” You’re speaking through tears that you are fighting back, “This isn’t us, you said it last night. But if we stay together now, this is what we’re going to be, and I don’t want you to be someone I end up hating.”
Drew’s silent, staring at you like he’s hoping he’ll wake up from a nightmare.
“So I think we need to break up,” You choke through the words, though they feel cold as they leave your lips.
“(Y/N) please,” He whispers, tears spilling over his eyelashes.
“I can’t fight for this anymore Drew,” You shake your head and your tears fall too now, staining your cheeks as they do.
He moves forward and grips your hands, pulling them into the middle of his larger palms and bringing them to his lips. You drop your head forward and press your forehead to his. His tears drop down and mix with yours over your tangle of hands, neither of you wanting to move as if moving would solidify what had just been finalised already.
“I’m never not going to love you, (Y/N).”
You nod against his chest, “Then you’ll go, and I’ll stay, and we’ll find our way back.”
(((Adding a normal people reference so that you don’t all hate me for breaking your hearts xoxo)))
