#otomeisekai

Don't ever ask me if I remember any characters names because I don't 😭💀

WTF?! Wdym I isekaied as the villainess and I'm bound to die from my finace who is the overlord of the underworld?! This plot is just like every other otome isekai you have read. -Coral's crappy productions.

*melts into a puddle in Ch 134*

LETS GOOOOOOOOOOO new chapter of Gold and Rubies is uppppp

I used to read like 1 or 2 otomeisekai stuff in 2019 but then March2020 happened. And man have I gone down the otomeisekai rabbit hole since then. At first it started with discovering the Remarried Empress novel on wordexcerpt and then some more of their novels. I went from novel to webtoons. 

What's weird is that some of the stuff which got me into this genre suddenly looks so appalling (I’m not sure if that is the word I’m looking for). For example I just can’t read Remarried Empress anymore not the novel and not the webtoon. There was a time when I wanted to see the end of that story but now I just physically can’t. 

2nd is Lucia. I read it for the smut which got repetitive but I liked the side stories..Anyways I didn’t know it had a manhwa adaptation so when I found out I was excited but damn did that excitement died after seeing the art. No disrespect towards the hardworking artists but that art is not my cup of tea. I don’t remember what the characters looked in my imagination but they definitely didn't look like the webtoon version and now if I try to read the novel all I can picture is the manhwa version of them😐 . And I still tried reading it but  soon realized that I just hate Lucia as a character! And I don’t have any particular feelings for Hugh since he is a generic ML. 

Look at this beautiful cover I commissioned for my story! The artist is so good and was a delight to work with! If you like the style I highly recommend her! I'll link her insta to this post.

https://instagram.com/byjennn?igshid=ojfbquxpwfrc

It's for my story about a 26 year woman named Megan from our world being ripped from her life here and plopped into the world of a game her roommate plays, in the body of the villainess... who is 5.

It turns out the god of that world needs her help in stopping the coming apocalypse.

But first Megan has to live long enough to get there!

If you're interested you can find it here on Wattpad at https://my.w.tt/p3yyqoqVU9

Eeeeeh I'm so happy it has a cover now!

What I always find endearing (?), is how Rupelali are just so ignorant of their own feelings for each other. It's not a simple misunderstanding type of situation, but rather "two people who have never experienced romantic love can't tell they love each other". Love, after all, is an abstract concept, especially for the both of them. Lari, as fond as she is of romantic novels, has never felt romantic love of her own, and fails to recognize the "heartaches" she feels when she looks at Rupert is romance (heavily hinted), and instead mistakes it as anxiety/nervousness/guilt, which is an emotion she's very much used to from her trauma of TL1.

What amuses me, is that SO MANY people knew Rupert and Lari had a thing for each other, YEARS before the two actually realized it themselves. In manhwa chapter 60, Tori first hinted at Rupert's feelings for her. Around that time, Louis had complained that he was already giving special treatment towards Lari. As crown prince, the maids and servants noticed when Rupert protected Lari from the arrogant knight, and how he defended her when she was framed. This gossip spread to the south, where Nelly and the Nanny had asked her about that palace romance - which of course Lari denied. Because, as far as she was aware, she was bound to Rupert though that promise in Chapter 32 - She was his maid, she belonged to him, and that's it. She earned enough of his trust so he'd protect her, and that's it. He may own her, but her feelings are her own

Besides, It's not like Rupert ever showed any romantic feelings for her. He's the usual Rupert - minds his own business, is rude, and condescending to her. He still insults her sometimes... where is the romance in that? Again, she's just his trusted attendant. Of course, others will see "romance" between them, but they don't know of their promise. But Lari's not dumb, when she realized Rupert yeeted to the South, even harming himself with Alchemy when he heard she was injured.... she admits, yes, she's become someone so important to him... those feelings *could* be of love... but... So she chooses to IGNORE her suspicion that he loves her. That's not something she wants to find out the answer to. After all, "he" killed her in TL1. He's treated her the same as always. She doesn't want to get ahead of herself and embarrass herself by jumping to conclusions either. So she chooses to run away, and not talk to him about it. Even when he proposes marriage - even though he was serious - the fact he was so nonchalant about it made Lari think he wasn't serious at all, and decline it.

Lari's characterization is consistent: She's been alone this whole time, she doesn't have anyone she can trust and talk to about things like this. She bottles up her emotions, trying to deal with everything herself. She convinces herself that Rupert doesn't like her, doesn't feel anything special for her, because he has Tori. She shouldn't get in their way, because she's an outsider. She doesn't want to talk to Rupert about it, because it's none of her business. Lari keeps on running away from her own feelings, and from Rupert as well.

After Rupert acknowledges that he really, really cares about Lari, really treasures and cherishes her, and vows to give her anything she wants in Ch 98 (but doesn't quite understand he loves her yet), Lari feels burdened by his feelings. It's getting harder for her to deny his feelings, and she feels so guilty and awkward, she starts hiding from him, but of course as tenacious as he is, Rupert always goes to look for her. He actually finds it a bit fun to find her during this game of "hide and seek" (he also gets Elaine and Louis to help lol). It gets to the point that Lari is aware, but full on denial of his feelings by the night of his coronation to Emperor. As much as she trusts him, her self-doubt blinds her:

Through Lehan's gaslighting, Lari was convinced: As much as Rupert loves and cherishes her, it won't be enough. He will choose the throne over her.

That is literally Lari's fatal mistake: she's so caught up in her despair, she makes assumptions out of fear. She's completely blindsighted to even the idea that Rupert truly loves her, and will choose HER over the throne. She understands how much she hurt Rupert, poor Rupert who was happy at how well they were getting along, living a comfortable live at the palace... all he wanted was the be coronated Emperor and have Lari be happy and congratulate him... but all he got was Lari, who had disappeared, and he found her unconscious in a sea of flames.

When she woke up, Lari finally apprehended him: He loves her, doesn't he? Although Rupert couldn't clearly articulate "yes", Lari knew it all along: he did. He does. But in her condition, she was unable to accept. So she chooses to break everything off. Otherwise she'd feel overwhelmed by the burden of everything in both timelines, and want to die. So Rupert allowed her to leave, because by being free, she would be "alive". While in the village, Lari again, knows full well how much Rupert love her, and how much she hurt him by feigning ignorance to his feelings. She just hoped he would have moved on by now... but she can't help but miss him, and all the time they spent together. While she hated House Belois, especially Lehan and Trash dad, she could never hate Rupert. She kept Lehan around to get updates on how Rupert was doing, after all. She really misses him, and the time they spent together at the palace. And when they reunited - she felt so relieved and excited to see him again, a feeling that she had almost forgotten after a year ... So by the time chapter 124ish comes around, that time apart had strengthened Lari's resolve: She has finally healed enough to accept Rupert's feelings, as well as her own. Her choice was clear: She will stay beside Rupert, and ensure he's happy and will protect him, because if not her, who else? She will protect him, herself. If he still loves her this much, then why should she continue to deny bother her feelings, and his? There's no point in her pointless shame and apologies, if he's really accepted them both as well. So the answer is clear: she chooses to, and will stay beside him from now on as "Lariette". :)