#osdd ask

We literally had amnesia of our trauma. The issue is not forgetting your trauma. The issue is claiming that you can have a disorder without trauma, and misinforming others. Your reasoning behind that doesn’t matter. When we thought we weren’t a system but knew we were plural, we used other language, because we valued not speaking on an experience we felt we had no right to. Not hard, wasn’t hard for us to do.

I don’t need to explain anything to you about our medical care, to be very honest.

But sure, since you asked, no we are not professionally diagnosed as of now, but our medical care team does know, and has met some of our alters, thanks for the concern. We split many more than just lil “cartoon characters,” just so you know, have introjected abusers and mindmades. Very much not a quirky lil thing where we just get our favorite characters like it is for some people.

Anything else? Want a letter from our doctor too?

its more complicated than you and your specific circumstance and the lack of nuance is really weird. you cant just look at someone and assume youre more traumatised than them and need a gold star, you dont know them. for a lot of systems, this is their first step to finally unpacking trauma and this is backed up by recent research in the field if you bothered to actually do any. im literally doing my thesis on this and have spoken to professionals lmao.

I will never support using the label of a community that are victims of extensive trauma if you genuinely believe you do not have that trauma. There are other labels for plurality that are not medical disorders. And I cannot stomach talking to someone who is happy about their “disorder” that we suffered horrific abuse to have, and I never will. Leave our blogs if it bothers you.

I do not care.

You do research and you do not use labels of medical disorders. It is harmful and offensive.

We were plural, I thought I had something, but I did not know I had childhood trauma. I researched, and I did not claim a disorder because I thought I had no right.

It could depend on the system, so there may be some who are on the more overt end of things, but overall, I would say that masking is very normal. OSDD tends to be a covert disorder, meaning that masking as the host in order not to be noticed makes a lot of sense in that regard.

As for stopping, it can be hard to say. If it would put you in danger to be more expressive, I would unfortunately have to say to take it easy around those type of people. However, if you're just talking while you're alone, or while around trusted people, then maybe I can offer some tips.

If you're around said trusted individuals, you could makes note of yourself masking and practice being more open with them. Give yourself time, of course, but if you can tell them who you are, and they know what you're trying to do, it might allow you to be more truly yourself.

If that's not an option, and you just want to be more you while alone, then I suppose it's still worth taking note of those times you feel as if you're acting --only doing or saying something because that's what the host would do-- and allowing yourself to let loose.

Dress more how you want to, partake in your hobbies, eat foods you like, talk about things you enjoy, allow your specific speech patterns to flow. Things of the like!

And lastly, of course masking doesn't mean you're faking. Sometimes it's safer to act as the person you're expected to be. Even if that was only the case in the past, or is just an instinct from unrelated trauma, it's what you're inclined to do. And that's okay. You can work through it how you so choose.