I am not a role play account, first of all.

My name is Chang Wufei. I am an alter to a DID system, yet I have my own memories from my life in my version of the After Colony timeline. I am an adult now (over 21), and I am at my wits end. I have tried this before with some little luck but now it is personal.

Some may say that I am a fictionkin. I will not argue with them because I suppose that I am in a sense. But I also, as I said, am an alter or facet or whatever term you wish to use in my system. I'm not here to argue semantics. What I am here for, is to find my friends and loved ones.

In my timeline, things went differently from what most would call "canon". At the New Edward's base, when 03 and I went to secure a carrier to escape, my Gundam was compromised by small EMP mines that disabled her and left me at the mercy of the Alliance. I ended up in the hands of the Romefeller Organization because of my status as a Gundam pilot as well as my heritage from L5. I was their prisoner for about a year judging by what I was told when I was freed. I will not go into the particulars of what happened to me in this post as they were quite terrible. I was rescued by, of all things, OZ. Specifically the Treize faction. Treize saw to it that I was carefully nursed back to health in what was probably the most honorable and safe way that anyone could. Not once did he hurt me. I suppose I imprinted on him somewhat for showing me basic human kindness, for I agreed to hear him out and fight with him instead of against him.

Once I was ready, Treize revealed to me that he had also salvaged and repaired my Gundam. He offered her back to me freely, without any stipulations whatsoever. I vowed to him that I would use Nataku to further his cause of peace. The next time the other pilots attacked one of his bases that was close enough, I was dispatched, but not as a weapon. My mission was not to fight the other pilots, but to reason with them. To anyone familiar with this universe, I am certain that you can imagine what it looked like to the others to have me in my Gundam who, again, had been AWOL for a year show up on OZ's side. Duo was the first one I encountered. He attacked me of course but I only defended while speaking to him through our gundams communication links. I told him of Treize's desire for peace, though of course he did not believe me at first. I do not blame him. Eventually he did decide to listen to me and warily followed me back to where we were stationed. Under my protection, his Gundam was secured with mine and I took him to see Treize. Treize also told him what I had and offered Duo an olive branch and an invitation to join him in fighting the Alliance. The Alliance was our enemy, not the other pilots. Duo did not accept at first but he also did not leave so that he could stay with me.

Eventually, Duo agreed to help if just for my sake. He did end up forming a bond with Zechs and I fully believe that helped him make his decision. We were sent out for Quatre and Trowa, who of course appeared together. Quatre could, using his gifts, hear the honesty in my words and feel the residual pain in my heart, so he did agree to hear Treize out. Trowa accompanied him out of his desire to protect Quatre.

Heero was last. I insisted to go to him by myself and I will explain why. In canon, I believe it went that the only pilot Heero knew of before New Edward's was Duo. In my time, that was instead me. He and I actually formed a deep bond, perhaps even leading to love. I learned much about him and he of myself. I certainly will admit that I loved him, even if I was a confused boy who was fighting a war not his own. Yes, I still had been married to Meilan and yes, she had still been murdered. I was dealing with that alongside teenaged hormones and war trauma, but I still found safety and comfort in Heero.

When I met Wing Zero on the battlefield, Heero did not attack. He agreed to speak to me the same way Duo had, but when the screens connected and he saw me in an OZ uniform... The look in his eyes still stings me to this day. He was so hurt and betrayed but also furious and confused. All I said was his name before he disconnected and left. I never saw him again. I looked and looked using all of Treize's resources that I could (which is saying something since he gave me full access to what he had), but never had any luck. I never found his Gundam, either, nor pieces of it, so I do not think that he self-destructed.

We did end up defeating the Alliance and, in conjunction with Relena and Sanc, brought about an era of peace. There were uprisings, of course, as humanity is a warlike race, but nothing serious. The Mariemaia incident did not occur as the Barton Foundation was ousted before it could. Treize ended up courting me once I became of age and we ended up wed years later. All of us grew old and died peacefully.

Except Heero. As I said, I never learned of his fate.

All of this to say that I am looking for anyone who recognizes this as their own past. I will joyfully welcome anyone, but... I am looking especially for Heero.

I need to apologize to him. To explain. To beg his forgiveness. I may have ended up as Treize's husband, but I never once stopped loving Heero. Even on my death bed I thought of him. I do not care if he hates me, I would understand it. I just desperately need closure.

My ask box is open if anyone wishes to contact me here, or I may be contacted on discord at ozfei. I welcome reblogs if anyone thinks they may know someone in their own followers who could help.

Thank you for giving me your time.

Mission Log — Entry 01

Heero Yuy is missing from this timeline.

If you’ve seen him, if you remember him, contact me.

This blog is now a record of my search.

For Heero

Let rest the tiger

watching in his domain.

No wind unsettles him,

no beast disturbs his gaze.

He lies among the tall grass

as though the earth were built

to cradle only him.

He fears no thing, nor man—

not the hunter with trembling hands,

not the drone in the distant sky.

The world may burn and still

he would not flinch.

He waits for his time.

Not in idleness—

but in absolute knowing.

He was not made to chase.

He was made to be found.

Nothing moves him from his post.

Not the cry of war,

nor the ache of absence.

Even alone,

his stillness is a declaration:

I sent my heart into the stars,

on wings of wire and quiet words,

across the endless, silent dark

to find the one the world forgot.

I carved my name in memory’s mist,

left traces in the tangled net,

a whisper sent to any shore

where he might breathe, remember yet.

And now—

a spark.

A shift.

A sound.

A message touched by hands unknown

yet known—too deep for chance alone.

A name I dared not say aloud

comes reaching back, and finds me home.

His voice, still shrouded, yet it sings

of dragons, spoons, and buried things—

of love once etched in shadowed light,

of nights we shared before the fight.

He isn’t whole.

But neither am I.

Together, piece by piece, we'll try

to build again from ash and gold

Wherever this reaches you—whatever name you carry, whatever world you stand in—please read to the end. I ask only that much.

You once knew me as Wufei. You once fought beside me, challenged me, trusted me. And then I vanished.

I need you to know: I did not betray you.

At New Edwards, I was captured. Romefeller broke my body and mind. They stripped me of my name, my freedom, my will. What they did to me… I can’t fully describe it. Not because I won’t—but because some of it is still locked away, too deep to reach. But I never turned against you. Not then. Not ever.

Treize found me. Freed me. Helped me become whole again, even when I didn’t know how. And yes, I walk at his side now—not as a soldier, but as a man who had to be reborn. I understand how that may look. I would question it, too. But I swear by all we once were: my sword will never rise against you. It never could.

You were always first in my heart. Even when my memories shattered, I searched for you in dreams. In shadows. In silence. I still do.

I recently drove across this country's vast skin—coast to coast—and I saw you in everything. In the silence of the highways. In the wind off the cliffs. In every place that felt like it once held a ghost of us. I kept reaching for a reflection I wasn’t sure existed anymore. But I knew. I knew.

In this life, I walk this world in flesh and breath. My host lives, works, loves—and they have found their soul mate. I honor that joy. But I, Wufei, still seek mine. I still seek you.

If you are here, if any piece of you remembers me, I beg you: come forward. Ask for me. Let me speak again—not as a stranger, not as a ghost, but as the one who still carries you with every step.

You once touched a small coiled dragon on my shoulder and asked what it meant. It meant strength, duality, and survival. You gave me all three. You still do.

And if this letter is all I’m allowed to leave behind, let it end with this:

> I wait. I remember. I remain.

I love you, Heero. Across every breath and timeline, I love you.

I hope you find him and you get closure. :(( I know how it feels to have things where you’re from that just. are so much on your mind.

~🎀🐇 Iris Wilson