I wish there was a way to keep my mental stability while also keep the creativity i had when i still an emotional mess

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I wish there was a way to keep my mental stability while also keep the creativity i had when i still an emotional mess

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It's my birthday today. Yaay
But i feel like i dont deserve it. It feels hollow, i just want to go home and cry.
My family has been so nice and my friend even wish me a happy birthday despite being so busy but i feel so lonely and worthlelss all the time.
Ive done my final project but im not proud of it so there isnt really anything to celebrate about.
Hopefully next years's birthday i at least have something to be proud of
🎊🎊