It was a beautiful sight, your sweet boyfriend on his knees, ass up and face down, waiting for your touch. Whines and whimpers left his lips in a steady stream, needy wiggles of his hips in your face.

“calm down.” you landed a slap on his ass, bringing his movements to a halt. Popping the cap of the lube, you placed a thick glob of it on your index and middle finger, spreading it out and warming it up with your thumb. Placing another glob on his hole, you smeared it over the skin. “ready?”

Oikawa was nearly vibrating with anticipation. Barely containing his excitement and need, he nodded furiously and pushed his hips back against your fingers. He gasped loudly when a finger slowly pressed in, burying his face in the sheets and trying to push back further.

“stay still.” you commanded, pushing more of the finger in, knowing he can take it. You thrust it carefully, slowly stretching the muscle out, eventually pushing in a second finger and grinning with his loud groan. “feeling good?” he could only moan and nod, your fingers thrusting slightly faster. You pushed in your fingers as far as they’d go, searching for his prostate, grinning when his head shot up. Jackpot.

-

“oh my fuck- please!” rubbing his prostate while tugging on his cock was probably cruel, but the way the high whines passed from his lips were too addicting. “I’m gonna cum, babyyy babybabybaby I’m cumming-!” hot and sticky cum shot from his cock, falling and staining the sheets in ropes. You only slowed down for a moment, soon picking up the pace again and fucking him harder on your fingers, choked out moans and gasps falling loudly from his lips.

His second orgasm came faster, already sensitive and on edge from the first. It was more of a slow dribble than a shooting of cum, but the sensation was just as aggressive as the first, nearly knocking him off his knees. You smiled, pulling your fingers out and patting his cheek.

“alright, think you’re ready for the strap now.” You could see his body tense up, head whipping back to watch you put on the strap and coating it in lube. Getting conflicted, he wasn’t sure if he was supposed to be needier or asking you to stop. He quickly chose the former, watching your smile as you returned to the bed and gripped his hips. He pushed his hips back slightly, gasping when the strap slapped down on his ass. You had already lubed it up, gripping the base and tilting the tip down to press against his puckering hole. “you ready for me?”

“please! Please, please, want it” his eyes glossed over, he breathed heavily and gripped the sheets under him. Burying his face in the fabric, he groaned loudly when you slowly started to push in. “oooooh fuck- fuck” he’s babbling, whining as you push in deeper and deeper, squirming when your hips touch his.

“look at that baby, so full for me. How does it feel?” you smirk, knowing that his mind should be going fuzzy by now, the overstimulation from the previous orgasms already having him on edge, and the pressure of being stuffed full hopefully sending him over the edge into full submission.

“it’s- ‘s so so good- good- please” oikawa is barely coherent by now, broken words slurring together while his body slumps down, hips only staying up from your bruising tight grip on them. High-pitched and pretty whines leave his parted lips, muffled by the bed as you roll your hips slowly against his, pushing up against his prostate. Before he knows it, he cums again. It’s not the usual burst of blinding light, instead his whole body shakes, like a punch to his gut while his cock twitches and jumps painfully. “p-please I can’t- can’t cum anymore! Pleasepleaseplease no more”

You stop your movements for a moment, hips flush against his while your hand smooths down his back. It’s soothing, his tense muscles relax under your fingers. All until you grip his hair tightly, yanking his face up from the bed, a loud squeak escaping his lips. You pull him up, placing your lips against his ear.

“I decide when it’s enough. And you’re not done yet.” Your voice is low, free hand moving off his hip to his sensitive cock, wrapping your fingers around it and smiling when he whines and squirms. “what do you say, tooru?”

“t-thank you” he barely sobbed out, tears streaming down his face.

“good boy. Now give me one more.”

but, there was a problem that Kuroo didn't know about. you had anxiety, and were trying to go off your meds for the first time. this situation wouldn't normally be a problem, but with the lack of aid from your meds, you were quickly starting to feel overwhelmed. Kuroo and the people around you were focused on the game, screaming and cheering for the teams on the court, the tension in the air put pressure on your chest and slowly made it harder for you to breathe. your pulse was quickening, breathing got harder and harder, and tears started to well up in your eyes. the panic was starting to set in and Kuroo was oblivious to it all. you tried all your soothing techniques, but none worked. minutes felt like a lifetime as the panic rose and eventually broke down your wall, tears spilling down on your cheeks and you quickly stood up and hurried off the bleachers.

you found a bench near the infirmary where it was quiet. tears poured out of your eyes, muffled sobs left your lips as you desperately tried to calm down.

Kuroo was still watching the game, unable to tear his eyes from the tension. Yamaguchi was getting put in as a pinch server, something that was surprising to pull out this early, and Kuroo turned to you to explain what a pinch server was, when he realized you weren't there. his eyes darted around, trying to find you, and eventually asked Akaashi, who had been sitting next to you, where you had gone.

"hm? oh they left… about 10 minutes ago?" Akaashi said, only taking a brief look at his watch before continuing intensely watching the game.

Kuroo got up, suddenly very worried that something had happened. he hurried down the stairs, first checking the bathroom, and then finding you near the infirmary, crying quietly.

he rushed to your side, wrapping an arm around you, causing you to gasp.

"what's wrong (y/n)? are you okay?" he softly said, rubbing gentle circles on your arm. you couldn't answer, the anxiety attack squeezing your throat closed. Kuroo didn't pressure you, only sitting by your side, gently holding you. the attack calmed down, and your breathing got steadier.

"I'm sorry." you whispered, looking up at Kuroo, who was giving you a questioning look. "i should have told you, i have anxiety. that… was an anxiety attack." Kuroo gave you a kiss on the head before speaking.

"you have nothing to apologize for, but please let me know next time when you feel like you're getting an anxiety attack, okay? i hate the thought of you feeling like you have to deal with it on your own. we're a team now, right?" he smiled softly, and you nodded.

…

you stayed there until the first set was done, Kuroo softly telling you about what you had missed, all while still holding you close.

DAICHI

"darling, it's okay, we're not lost." Daichi said, despite knowing full well that you were very lost. karasuno had a game in Tokyo, and you had decided to tag along, partly to support your boyfriend and his team, and partly so you and daichi could do some tourism in the big city. all was going according to plan, the game was in the evening, so the team had decided to go on their separate adventures around the city. you dragged Daichi along with you to find some niche store you had heard of online. the store had been harder to find than you anticipated, and it was getting closer and closer until the team was supposed to meet up again.

"Daichi, you're supposed to meet up with the others in an hour and we have no idea where we are!" your hands were shaking, trying to read the map you had picked up at a souvenir shop. "okay, i think we're here? so we should follow this street." you said, pointing at a street lined with shops.

Daichi, however, had noticed your shaking hands and quick breaths.

"hey, (y/n), can i look at the map real quick?" he asked, taking the map from you. "yeah, so that would be the quickest way back, but i think we should take this street and then go that way."

"but that will take us 20 minutes longer to walk, if we go the quickest way we'll be back in like 40 minutes." you were trying to force your hands to stop shaking, opting for holding them together, and trying to make soothing patterns. you knew very well that an anxiety attack was coming up, but you were working with all your might to calm down to get Daichi back in time. you started going over the route in your head and biting off the skin on your lips.

"it's okay," Daichi said as he put his hands around yours, "I'll call coach Ukai and tell him we're going to be a bit late. your health is also important (y/n). they can head to the arena and we can meet them there." your breath was quickening and Daichi pulled you in for a hug. the dam burst and you started crying, shaking in his grip.

"it's going to be my fault that you're late, you should go without me." you managed to gasp out between sobs. you felt Daichi hum and shake his head.

"nope, not going to happen. the team can wait, they'll understand." he pulled away, only to hold your face in his hands and looking into your eyes. "you're the love of my life darling, I'm not going to leave you, not now, not ever."

BOKUTO

Bokuto may be dense as hell sometimes, but when you told him about your anxiety and anxiety attacks, he made a conscious effort to be more attentive. you had told him about the situations that usually would trigger your anxiety, and how to help you. Bokuto had even written these things down.. and then lost the paper. nonetheless, he was always on guard to help you in every situation possible.

one of your triggers were giving speeches, something you had told all your teachers, and most of them understood, except your English teacher, so when he handed out the assignment for speeches, he paid your anxiety no mind and had just told you to suck it up and that he didn't give special treatment.

the night before the speech was due and you were practicing in front of your mirror. English wasn't your best subject, and with the added pressure of the speech, you were having a difficult time memorizing the speech. after running through it for the 20th time, you let out a frustrated huff and dropped the paper on your desk, sinking to the floor. your mind was working in overdrive, counting up everything that could go wrong during the speech tomorrow. what if you tripped on your way to the front of the classroom? what if you dropped your paper? what if you mispronounced a word or said something wrong? what if, what if, what if? your felt the tightening of your chest, a warning of an upcoming anxiety attack. tears welled up and spilled over, sobs and shaking overtaking your body. you reached up to your desk with a shaky hand to grab your phone, quickly pulling up Bokuto's contact.

"hey hey heeey (y/n)! how's my favorite person doing?" Bokuto said as he answered the phone, you could hear the sound of people talking in the background, and Akaashi saying hello to you. crap, he wasn't alone.

"hi." you choked out, another sob overtaking you. you could hear your boyfriend's whole demeanor change.

"what's wrong? are you okay?" the screeching of a chair was heard, most likely Bokuto getting up and walking away from his friends to talk to you in private.

"the speech" you quietly said, tears still streaming from your eyes, your lips quivering.

"the speech? what speech?" Bokuto asked, mind not fully connecting the dots. you let out a sob, not being able to focus on giving him an explanation. suddenly, it all clicked. "ah wait, that English speech? i thought you had gotten a pass from all your teachers?"

"not from him." you whispered again, gasping a little for air, as the anxiety sunk deeper into your chest.

"that ass! okay, just hold on I'll be right there, you're home right?" you hummed in agreement as you heard the rustling of his jacket. "okay, you're okay, I'll be right there babe, don't worry we'll figure something out."

you nodded, breathing starting to get slightly easier. "i love you."

"i love you too" you could hear him trying to suppress a smile, "do you want to keep talking while i run to your house?"

OIKAWA

"ah thank you so much!" your boyfriend, Oikawa, said with a flirty smile to one of his fangirls. she had made him (and his team) volleyball themed cookies. Oikawa's smile made the girl blush and look away, saying something about how it was nothing, to which Oikawa insisted that it was very much something.

his fangirls were somewhat comfortable with him, some having stuck around for years and going to all of his games. your loving boyfriend insisted that they meant no harm, but their dirty looks and demeaning comments about you told a different story.

"does your partner bake for you, Oikawa?" one of the girls said, sending you a mean look as you stood with his team.

"no, they don't like baking." Oikawa said, still smiling sweetly.

"aah a partner that doesn't bake? aw, but you deserve to be treated with home-baked goods all the time!" the girl said, several others nodding in agreement.

you watched as one of the girls got confident, reaching out to touch his hand while saying "i would bake for you, Tooru~", her voice was sickly sweet and the rest of the girls watched in shock.

your breath hitched, heart beating out of your chest. Oikawa had his back to you, but you could see his shoulders tense at his first name being used.

"really? thank you so much!" Oikawa said, shoulders still tense, but you could hear the smile when he spoke. if he could only stop being polite for two seconds.

panic overtook you, he didn't reject that girl's advancements? you could hear the murmuring of their voices as they kept talking, but the sound of your heartbeat was drowning it out. your breath was quickening, tears slowly welling up in your eyes.

weren't you good enough for him? was he going to leave you for some fangirl? one who bakes? and spoils him? one who has been there since the start… it would make sense. your relationship was pretty new, and before dating him you didn't even really know of the volleyball team at school. of course he was going to leave you for one of them! you're not as attractive as them, not as devoted to his passions… not enough.

tears started falling from your eyes as you hurried away to the bathroom, escaping from Oikawa's flirty nature and the girl's nasty looks.

your sobs echoed in the small bathroom, hands shaking as you desperately covered your mouth to muffle the sound. your mind was spinning, the panic sitting in your chest, making it hard to breathe.

suddenly, a knock at the door.

"(y/n)? are.. you crying?" it was one of the volleyball members, a voice you recognized but couldn't place.

"i'm fine!" you said, holding back a sob but failing. well, that's embarrassing. you could hear his footsteps, running back to the team. seconds go by, you try to calm your breathing to no avail.

footsteps can be heard again, different ones but going faster.

"(y/n)? (y/n), babe, where are you?" it was Oikawa. you let out a whimper, enough to draw his attention to you. he knocked on the door.

"baby? are you okay? can you come out here please?" concern swallowed his voice, making your heart ache. you unlocked the door and walked out.

his eyes were full of worry when they met yours, your tear stained cheeks and shaking frame broke his heart.

"oh sweetheart, i got you." his arms wrapped around you, kissing you on the head and rubbing slow circles on your back. "do you want to talk about it?"

you let out a small sob, grasping the back of his shirt. "I'm not good enough for you."

any remaining pieces of his heart broke. he hugged you tighter, hoping his admiration for you would seep through his skin and on to you.

"(y/n), you're more than enough. you're everything to me."

USHIJIMA

university applications. the current target of your anxiety. you and your boyfriend of two years, Ushijima, were studying in the school library together, something you tried to do at least once a week. he was across the table from you, hand laying flat next to his textbook, the other neatly writing down notes. the library was quiet, only occasional coughs and turning of pages bouncing off the walls. quiet. too quiet.

math wasn't your strongest subject, something that made it very easy for your mind to drift away from the questions on the paper.

your grades had been slipping, not a lot, but enough to drag down your average. you're smart, but this being your last year in high school has put it's pressure on you. the looming university applications drifted into your mind, suddenly math seemed to be the least of your problems.

can you still raise your grades? or is it too late? what happens if you don't get into university? what if you miss one crucial question on the application and you automatically get dismissed and you don't even find out?

your grip on your pen tightened, mind reeling and breath coming out short.

your dear boyfriend however, was oblivious. his focus was entirely on his homework, knowing full well that he will get scolded by the coach if his grades drop too low.

but eventually, your erratic breathing caught his attention, him looking up just to see a tear fall from your eye and land on the open math textbook.

"what's wrong?" he said, hesitating before putting his hand over your shaky one.

a sob slipped past your lips and you slapped your hand over your mouth, panic flashing over your eyes as you jumped out and ran out, embarrassed by the loud noise. Ushijima hurried after you, quickly closing his book while doing it.

he finds you further down the empty halls of the school, curled up and shaking.

"(y/n)." he says stoic as ever, but you can see the worry behind his eyes.

"it's the uni applications.." you say, quietly, while letting out a shaky breath. Ushijima moves to sit down next to you, an arm going around your shoulders to pull you in to him.