#oh him...

i honestly don’t know what my emotions are. do i like this guy? do i only like him as a friend? i have no idea, and i don’t how to figure it out.

we talk a lot, yeah. (everyday OTL.) but he never does anything else other than be the nice, caring, adorable guy he always is. sure there are some perverted comments here and there… but he’s a teenage guy. it’s understandable, and sometimes i find it funny.

do i like him enough to have a crush on him? idk.

i feel jealous when i see him talking to my friend, but i feel jealous for the stupidest reasons and for people that i shouldn’t feel jealous for. i’m jealous when a friend that introduced to another friend hangs out with her without me. is that normal? do others feel like that when they have a similar situation?

i don’t really understand. do i like this guy as more than a friend? or is he just someone i really like talking to but i have no interest in pursuing a further relationship with him. i have doubted myself a couple of times; he really is a good friend of mine. but our relationship right now is mostly virtual; i see him only once a month for about three hours but i can see him more if i asked to hang out with him and his friends more often. but that’s giving in; that’s admitting to myself that i want to see him. i’m a stubborn person; there’s no way in hell that i can try doing that without a legitimate reason.