#object death

Going to be vulnerable and discuss something I feel like people in the community usually shy away from. This is going to be a long one, so I appreciate if you get past even this first paragraph. Ever since I was a kid I've always had overwhelming empathy for objects/nonliving things in part because of my autism. I had a favorite stick when I was in elementary school and when a bully snapped it I cried for hours after and grieved for days. Smiley faces drawn on notes or packaging being thrown away brought me to tears (still does sometimes). I broke down saying goodbye to our old family car when we sold her, not knowing where she would go afterwords or who would take care of her. People were never in the forefront of my affections, and even now I often struggle to feel the same sympathy for them over something not alive.

An example of this that I've been struggling with recently is the 909, A B-17 Flying Fortress that was flown by my museum's organization as part of an interactive historic warbird tour. She crashed at Bradley Airport in Connecticut in 2019 shortly after takeoff due to engine failure caused by maintenance oversights. From what I've read her pilot (and head of maintenance) loved her more than anything. He passed along with her. He tried his best to care for the old bird, but nothing can stop the deterioration that comes with age. I never got to see her in person like many of my older coworkers did but I can't help but feel this nagging closeness. She's like an angel to me, eluding my grasp, a life left behind in a trail of photos and articles. Every document I read about her feels like she's calling out to me, saying "come find me" when I know that every door I open will lead to nothing. I keep chasing but for what? I'll never see her again.

Some desperate part of me clings to the fact that one of her wings and tail survived the crash. There have to be pieces of her out there, begging to be held, loved, one last time.

There he is sitting on my bed covered in duct-tape. I hate it when my electronics break even if its expected theyd break for ages or if I'm not particularly attached to them it's just sad!

He wasn't all bad. His range was insane I swear I could walk a solid 50 metres away from the device that it was connected to without it disconnecting. He wasn't noise cancelling which is good when you have to listen out for rowdy kids and animals while listening to music.

His name was THE OOGLY DOMPLE btw and he will live on in my bluetooth connected devices long after he's gone. I'll miss the rattle the earpieces did when you picked him up.

A toast to Oogly!

His progenitor is the squiggly sample

I know twice might just be a coincidence, but I seem to be really good at falling in love with buildings who are soon to be demolished or heavily remodeled.

I think it's the charm of an object being "lived-in". I love seeing use... scratches, fingerprints, a worn down spot where people always brush up against it... It adds charm and personality. Like the old skee-ball machine on the boardwalk. Her paint is chipped from the salty air and the patrons, yet she's ever eager for another game. She's a hard worker. I just want to give her a hug and tell her how much she's appreciated and how beautiful she is despite, no, because of her state of decay. It's a symbol of love.

If you know me, you know about my bicycle partner, Roy Sixspeed. He's a grumpy old man who I found on the side of the road. From the wear, you could tell that he was well loved, and then eventually forgotten in a dark shed to gather cobwebs. I'm not sure what the story is, but I know I fixed him up gave him a second life, and now he happily joins me on all sorts of adventures. We spent Valentine's Day together at our favorite restaurant. I hope to tune him up this month too.

...I got sidetracked. Onto the story about the buildings! The first one I believe I posted about here already, so it'll be a short recap of the situation.

Around a year ago, I got news that my favorite antique store was moving locations. In its place would be a car dealership. The building was amazing, an old construction with red bricks, winding hallways, hand painted murals, and a view of the trains, who would pass by and shake the building. I loved spending time here, and it was a bit of a slow burn, but on the day I heard the news, it struck me just how much she meant to me. I took one last trip down, ran my hands across her brick facade, took a trip through all of her winding rooms, and said goodbye.

I haven't been to the new location nor the dealership, and frankly, I can't bring myself to. Neither one is fully her anymore. I miss her often.

This year, another one of my favorite buildings got a death date: some time in October. My favorite building in town is this storage facility/consignment shop built in the 1850s. Same deal, nice brickwork, stale air, big brass doors, secret passages, and a strangely comforting allure. I have a type, as we've established.

But I'd been going to see this building for a few years now, but on my most recent visit, I got the chance to go into the employee area. I was trying on some clothes and they didn't have a changing room, so they sent me in the catacombs to find a bathroom. It felt almost intimate, like he was trying to reassure me that it'd be okay. There was no light, save the old, dim incandescent lamps interspersed along the walls. This part was underground, and the stairs went further down still, I don't know how far... There had to have been so much history here. I'm going to miss him a lot. I should be able to get over before the demo happens, but if not, I'll miss him dearly.

favorite design is a tie between thomas and mitchell. thomas because hes ult badass and mitchell because i think it perfectly embodies him and i love doodling him

any story that i can actually leave be without modifying it 40 million times is a good story to me but my "favorite"/ the dead horse i keep beating LO is the Old Past shit between Cremini and Larry. Larry is tobias' dad btw idk if ive mentioned it before but hes dead They have a doomed yaoi thing where they met in SUTDS (the big fancy nerd college ive mentioned before) and fell in love but cremini was obsessed with figuring out time travel (very much possible with mathemagics but also super risky) (and also mitchell kept telling him not to and he didnt want him to be gone for so long either) and cremini ended up choosing the time travel 30 years in the future over living a long fulfulling romance life with larry and larry died by the time he got to the present and he got Big Sad about it. Thats why he ended up in the white void btw he got big sad and did like a special portal (thats how you get into the white void)