#nyh

Besides, there's the fact that it crashes a lot, even decreasing the video quality, but I'll keep doing it, I'll start drawing

i have never really enjoyed mcu's spiderman movies due to the portrayal of spiderman. growing up watching the spider-man series and the amazing spiderman series, i always felt that mcu's spiderman is so out of touch of the typical spiderman storylines because it's more focused on spidey wanting to be an avenger, spidey wanting to be somebody big doing good for the world, whereas in personally i grew up watching and getting used to a spider-man character who is kind of supposed to be like matt murdock's in a way? just a low lying vigilante, wanting to do good for society. so when andrew garfield's spiderman AND tobey maguire's spiderman turned up mid-movie, and all 3 peters decide to "come up with cures" for all the villans who came to the mcu in the school science lab, there was a nostalgic feeling of "ah, yes, that's the peter parker i know". i guess it's because, for the first time, marvel is letting peter parker solve an issue by himself (in a way) without any intervention by other factors (be it technology or a person).

which brings me to my next controversial opinion. i personally feel that mcu's spiderman would be nothing (at least, not as popular or as involved in the mcu as today) without stark tech + tony's influence, which is why i also think the ending of no way home was super appropriate cause it leads into the next trilogy of mcu's spiderman potentially being that neighbourhood crime watch vigilante he was meant to be in the first place. by doing so, making the world forget about him, spiderman has to start from the bottom, relying on himself this time. i'm excited to see how future films portray this version of spiderman.

next, i'm going to talk about the "spiderman reunion". while tobey maguire's spiderman was known to be "a pretty face" to my parents' generation and from their era, andrew garfield's spiderman is the one i grew up with. i think one reason why nwh is such a box office hit is because the cast involved is so diverse, and its perfect for families to watch it together (parents and teens revel in nostalgia, children who are avid spiderman fans would be happy that instead of one, there's three). i had GOOSEBUMPS as the three appeared on screen together for the final fight scene, and how they worked together, dealing with one villain at a time. that whole portion of the movie i sat upright in my seat, hands over my masked mouth. i even shed a few tears because this whole movie just felt like a fever dream.

i also really like how the director / screenwriter paid homage to all the previous spiderman films through little details and lines. tobey maguire's spiderman (peter 2) had his own reunion with dr. octavius, where dr. octavius acknowledges that peter 2 has grown well, and peter 2 replied that he's still "trying to do better", a homage to the first meeting of the 2 characters in spider-man 2. andrew garfield's spiderman and gwen stacy's tragic death happened the amazing spiderman 2. in this movie, he managed to redeem himself by saving mj instead, in the same way that he would have saved gwen if she managed to. the bittersweet emotion i felt when that happened was indescribable.

lastly i'm gonna come up with some theories for that eddie brock / venom end credit scene. i think that the piece of symbiote that got left in the mcu will eventually make its way to become spiderman's symbiote costume / black suit (in the mcu, instead of sony's spiderman universe [ssu]). looking at the ssu's development, as well as andrew garfield's popularity after nwh, i am hoping for a day where we see andrew garfield's spiderman make a return to the big screens, as part of the ssu, concurrently with tom holland's potrayal of the same character in the mcu.

i started over. i was really afraid to, but thinking about the chapters i had written left me feeling nauseous. i knew i couldnt keep those out in the world with my name on them. ive moved around some planning pieces, refocused some things, and i actually feel ready and motivated. focused. organized. 

hopefully this will all make sense as you read my story, but here’s my basic idea.

So I don’t want to use a diagnosis or adhere to an irl experience too much bc y’know their world/psychology and ours are very different. The closest I can compare it to is selective mutism. So its less of totally physical ailment a it is a psychological/neurological thing. This is why he speaks in some moments but cant in others.