numb without you (part twenty-three)
a/n: well I definitely didnāt get back on my writing grind over my Christmas break but thatās okay because guess whoās back and better than ever! I am writing this right now for el because an update is well deserved. if you are new to nwoy, welcome! if you are a veteran of this series, thank you for your endless support. I donāt want this authorās note to be too long so without further ado, part 23 (read part 22 here!)
pairing: readerxluke
playlist: numb without you by the maine, mysteryās gone by speak low if you speak love, valentine by COIN, gold on tv by lennon stella & jp saxe
word count: 1.6k
rating: PG-13
summary: y/n is nesting and her and calum have a heart to heart conversation
warnings: mild language
Y/Nās POV:
Calum stopping by was a kind of unexpected surprise, but it has been two weeks since that seemingly awkward encounter and you are swiftly nesting away at Lukeās place and Calumās. You are grateful for the fact that neither of them seems to mind too much, although you know what a hassle two cribs and two nurseries have already been before the baby is even here. You are very fortunate to have RM/N support you with your nesting at Calumās place. In fact, she stayed out of the nursery completely the last couple times I have been over at their place, but I believe that was more on the premise of her latest binge watch of New Girl over anything else.
Calum has been in and out of the studio a lot lately with Luke, so it has mainly just been you and RM/N at the house. It is surprisingly quiet in the house without Calum there, not that he usually is one to make a lot of noise. It seems like the only sounds throughout the entire house are coming from the television in the living room and the soft shuffle of your feet throughout the nursery. Your movement has become more of a waddle within the past couple of weeks. And you are slowly but surely becoming more impatient with waiting for your little bundle of joy to make her way into the world.
With your efforts, your little girlās nurseries are as complete as they can be. The only thing missing in both cribs in both houses are your baby sleeping within them. You have washed and folded every article of clothing you already have for her between your many shopping sprees and all the gifts you received from your baby shower. Her crib is all put together, the proudest factor of the whole ensemble being the pink and purple dinosaur sheets you found last week. You are as prepared as you are ever going to be for your firstborn child, you just hope that things wonāt become too overwhelming with the fact that she basically has four adults willing to take care of her at any given moment.
Calumās POV:
You have been in the studio tirelessly for the past several weeks. You understand why there are deadlines in the music industry, but at the same time you truly believe it somewhat stunts your creative abilities. You and Luke have been trying your best to get the melody right on your latest song, but you have been failing miserably. It doesnāt help that the studio is the last place the two of you want to be. You know that if anything happened that RM/N would call you right away and get Y/N to the hospital, but you still feel like you should be the one with her in these remaining days before the baby arrives.
-------------2 hours later---------------
You just parked in your driveway after a long day at the studio. You offered to take Luke home because the two of you carpooled there anyway, but was it really a bad thing that you hoped Y/N would still be at your place nesting by the time you got back? You know RM/N texted you twenty minutes prior that she was going to her three-hour lecture on campus and that she would be gone for most of the night. You know it would be the healthy thing to do if you talk out your issues with Y/N. She is usually a very understanding person and the only other person you usually bring up your issues to is RM/N. You donāt want RM/N to know that Luke and Y/Nās relationship is making you jealous. It would ultimately harm your current relationship with RM/N.
To your relief and simultaneously to your surprise, Y/N is sitting in the rocking chair in the nursery of your home. She is humming to herself quietly while rocking slowly back and forth, one hand on top of her very prominent baby bump. This is the kind of moment when you wished you were good at photography. You do your best to take a mental picture of this precious moment and find yourself daydreaming about all the precious moments to come with your daughter. It didnāt take long before Y/N noticed your presence and pulled you out of your own headspace.
āCalum, youāre home sooner than I thought you would beā¦you just missed RM/N. She had her night class tonight if Iām not mistaken,ā Y/N states as she slowly makes her way up and out of the rocking chair in the corner of the room.
āYeah, our producer let us out of the studio early since Luke and I canāt focus for the life of us haha,ā you respond lightly, hoping you didnāt startle Y/N as much as you think you have.
āWell I can go home if you want to be alone and decompress, Iāve spent most of my day here anyway. I should probably get home soon,ā Y/N replies with a gentle smile spread across her face.
āActually, there was something I was hoping we could discuss before I take you home,ā you start, silently hoping that she will agree to this conversation that wonāt be easy for either of you.
āYeah thatās fine, but can we talk on the couch? I have been on my feet way too much today alreadyā¦ā Y/N trails off as she heads to the couch, not waiting for your reply on the matter.
You join her on the couch, keeping an appropriate distance due to your want to respect her privacy and space. She is growing an entire human inside of her and that is no easy job. You donāt want to make her any more uncomfortable than she already is.
āI just wanted to talk about our current situation. Like obviously we are both in separate solid relationships with other people and I donāt want any confusion between us. Obviously, we are going to be parents soonā¦. I donāt know I guess what Iām trying to say is Iām happy for you and Luke, Iām glad the two of you are finally together. I mean we all saw it comingā¦just the timing of it all was a little concerning. And I guess you could turn that around on me as well considering how quickly I fell for RM/N⦠I donāt know I just feel very overwhelmed with it all ad I want to be as transparent with you as possible before the baby comes. Iām not a very open person and I know that is one of my flaws and I am trying for everyone elseās sake to get better at that, but I just wanted to let you know where I am at with all if this⦠I donāt want to end up resenting you or Luke or anyone in this situation. I just wanted to let you know where Iām at with all of this so you are in the loop, if that makes senseā¦ā you trail off recognizing that you just rambled off the problem to Y/N in possibly the worst way.
She takes a while to comprehend all of what you just said, you know that you dumped a lot of information on her all at once and you do not expect a response from her right away. You hope she understands where you are coming from though with all else considered. You hear her take a deep breath in before she says the words you were anxious to hear come out of her mouth.
āI believe we will find a way to work everything out once she is here. The two of us will always be her parents, it would take a heck of a lot to change that, but you also have to understand that Luke and RM/N are going to be a big part of her life as well. As much as I hate to admit this, we made a mistake. A beautiful mistake and I would not change it for the world, but a mistake, nonetheless. We have to act like the adults we are here and evaluate our situation with where we currently are and where we want to be as parents. I am willing to coparent with you and do everything that is necessary for our daughter and I need to know that you are on board with me on all of this as well. Our days are numbered in the sense that she will be here before either of us know it and I want to make sure we, for the lack of a better phrase, have our shit together before that time comes,ā Y/N concludes, which leaves you in awe with how much she has grown throughout the past eight months.
With that response alone your mind is now at ease. If the two of you could have a mature relationship on this subject matter, you are certain that you can conquer anything else that life throws at you. You thank Y/N for talking with you and most importantly for not bullshitting you on this. You offer to take her home, back to Luke, and she agrees by hugging you tight. You will be alright. Everything has its way of working out the exact way it is supposed to.

















