#nskwon

( ASK MEME II: HAPPY HOUR | accepting )

    it’s late at night, a few hours after the beginning of the party. yongjin both feels drunk and sober at the same time as he stands there on the rooftop, cold air waking him up more than he thought it would. the agent leans against the railing with a glass in his hand and his phone in the other when it pings, his eyes flying down to read the message. it makes him freeze for a few seconds, his eyes widen, lips pursed as he reads it a few times. it brings a sudden bout of melancholy, the alcohol doing nothing to slow down the emotions it brings.

   it’s… an easy answer to a difficult question, one that brings memories in its wake. yongjin remembers it all too clearly, the time they first met during training, the rigorous instances where they had to go over the same routine again, and again; then he remembers seojun and his fiancee, so happy together that it easily brought a smile on yongjin’s face. seojun was a great friend, someone yongjin opened up to, someone he enjoyed spending a lot of time with. and then, after that damned mission, he remembers the funeral, how that image shattered to pieces, how broken seojun was. that’s what upsets him the most, his inability to help a friend who had gone through such a horrible event — how they couldn’t even manage to keep in contact as time went on. the worry for his friend is still fresh in his mind, so is the feeling of longing, spending carefree time together, laughing over a nice meal. yongjin’s always been too talkative for his own good, but he can distinguish between an acquaintance and a friend, and seojun was — still is a good friend. yongjin refuses to use past terms. he is back after all, and he believes they can be on similar terms again. they’re both different people, but maybe that’s why they still can get along.

    his fingers ghost over the screen for a few seconds as he begins to type up a message, unsure what exactly the other waits from him. seojun should better know that of course yongjin has missed him, missed their friendship — is there any way he can make it clearer? he takes a swig of his drink and puts the glass down on the floor as he types up the rest. he is probably too drunk to have a proper filter, but he hopes the message goes across the way he wants.

📩   (  text to ➟ seojun  )  —  of course i did!!! what kinda question is that📩   (  text to ➟ seojun  )  —  i’m sorry i couldn’t … maybe i should have tried harder

   that’s when he takes a pause, unsure if he should have sent that. it’s impossible not to think about if he could have helped the man better, if he could have shown him that he was there for him if he needed anything — but it is too late now. at least they have a second chance, and yongjin couldn’t be more glad about that. he is going to do better this time, he has to.

( ASK MEME I: HEADCANONS | accepting )

↳ 🔥 what’s your greatest fear?

it is hard to pinpoint an exact fear, there are a few things here and there; the first one is that he hates is the idea of being dependent on someone. he wants to be self-sufficient, and it is rare for him to genuinely ask help when he needs it. one exception is doyoon so far, he knows they are family at this point, so he will ask for help. but in general, he wants to be able to do everything on his own, which is unrealistic most of the time. another irrational fear he wants to get over is that taewon hates the dark. most of the time, there is a night lamp on in his room, or the lights are on in the bedroom instead. it started after the incident with the foster family, and though he hides it well nowadays, he despises being in the dark. losing sight is one of the greatest fears he has, which is why he usually has a small flashlight in his bag, even though he hasn’t exactly used it yet.

↳ ✂️ what’s the hardest part about being a nis agent?

there are a few factors that come into play. after his previous job at the research center, being a weapon specialist at nis feels a lot more creative and interesting, so if he had to complain about one thing, it had to be that he gets to know the agents he is working with. he didn’t know who used his weapons in the past, but now that he is acquainted and friends with some of those people, the prospect of his weapons actually malfunctioning is… scary to say the least. he knows they wont, they go through countless tests and prototype stages, but he is still uneasy about the prospect that he could be the cause of innocent deaths, so he tries to ignore that as much as he can.

🔫 — what’s your preferred weapon, why?