#notstudyrelated

ok, so basically my class is shit (no wonder, most of my class mates are around 3 years younger than me), almost all lessons are boring because i don’t learn anything new and i still have two more years to go until i can finally study interior design. also i will change my school this summer and it scares me so much, because the whole system will be different and maybe my class mates are bullies or the teachers are mean or it will be super hard and difficult to follow up???? i’m so scared and annoyed and tired of this shit pls send help

it's so funny how people see me so much differently from how i see myself. they tell me i am the happiest person they know, because they've never seen me cry myself to sleep. they tell me how much they adore my self-esteem and don't hear the words that come up when i look into the mirror. they say i must be really strong when they find out what happened to me, but the truth is that i am so weak i can only cry in front of one single person. and that one left me and i will never see his face again and it just fucks me up.

Sorry for my lack of posts, I'm moving into my dorms tomorrow!