#notsherlock

In all honesty, this week has been absolutely horrendous. Really, I've just been feeling off lately, because things keep piling up and then my frustrations or concerns have nowhere to go.

Today I found myself honestly thinking about just walking in front of one of the cars passing me; right now I feel like no one would care, or notice, and my absence would benefit people far more than hinder them. I didn't act on this, obviously, but I just. I wanted to, and that scares me, you know?

Before this worries anyone that might read his, know that I'm not planning anything, just venting about passing thoughts and such. Trying to make sense of it all. I know I'll keep on going, but right now it's just difficult, if that makes sense. 

The other day I very much thought about how little I mean to everyone, and about how silly I've been for wanting to mean more. And then things just kept adding to that, making it worse.

I'm tired, I'm sad, and I feel very alone. I don't know how many times I can try opening up to people or try being happy one hundred percent of the time. I'm hardly getting any sleep, and I'm almost always nauseous or sporting a headache because of that.

I can't talk about anything though, because hey, people don't care. And I get that, and it's fine.