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Summary: Virgil makes a pet food run with disastrous wonderful results
WC: 2441
Warnings: swearing, panic attacks, non-consensual touch (non-sexual), negative self talk, past abusive relationship, past Anxceit, nonbinary Remus
A/N: Who would I be if I didn't write the soulmate prompt and post it late for Remus' birthday? Happy Birthday my favorite intrusive thot! đ
@dukexietyweek
"Look alive, Sunshiiine~"
Virgil groaned and rolled over in bed, ignoring his alarm. Truthfully, he wasn't sure why it was still armed since he had nothing to wake up for anymore.
The alarm jarringly skipped from the Danger Days opening to Brendon Urie screaming about something or other. Virgil groaned and wrapped a blanket over his head. He just didn't want to get up and he could feel it becoming an awful day already.
Fuck fuck fuckity fuck.
After three more screaming emo songs, Virgil finally managed to sit up to the softer tones of Evanescence, rubbing at his eyes and groaning in general protest of the concept of mornings. More like mournings.
He grabbed his favorite edgy hoodie and threw it on over his nightshirt, yawning as he smacked the shit out of the alarm clock. Wincing at the cracks and pops in his joints as he stood, Virgil made his way over to the full length mirror hot glued to his bedroom door. Most of his decorations were hot glued in place because of Ryuk.
As if on cue, the slinky little black kitten pushed her way in the slightly ajar door, meowing her own protest against Virgilâs inability to wake up and feed her promptly in the morning. Virgil smiled softly and bent down, petting her and ruffling the fur between her ears.
"Easy, baby. I'll get your food soon," he promised as the kitten stretched up to paw at the strings of his hoodie. Ryuk was about the only one in his life who he let see him without his daily make-up routine, and the only one who didn't flinch upon seeing his dead black soulmark.
Virgil scooped her up and stood to examine himself. The deep dark markings under his eyes and streaking down his cheeks to his neck were a complete enigma. Most soulmarks were on shoulders, hips, hands, or elbows, places people commonly accidentally bumped each other. He had no idea who would touch his face this way the first time they met. It didn't look like a kiss, it looked like he was going to get beat up and his soulmark was just the dark omen of how shit his soulmate would be.
He sighed and let Ryuk perch on his shoulder- he swore his cat wanted to be a parrot- and pulled out his concealer from the make-up bag on his dresser. Ryuk watched carefully as he covered the dark soulmark, the little kitten hardly blinking. She only shifted her weight to counterbalance Virgilâs movements.
Several layers of concealer and foundation later, Virgilâs face looked as pasty as a boo ghost made of a bed sheet. He smiled sharply, grabbing eye liner because emo has got to emo and finishing the look with black lipstick. He didnât bother to cover up the three pads of his fingers that were inky black. Hardly anyone noticed them. Ryuk meowed her support of her dark strange dad and jumped all the way to the floor, waiting impatiently for Virgil to follow.
"Alright! Food time," Virgil giggled and opened the door for her. At least Janus had left him the cat, right?
Virgil frowned as his thoughts swirled right back around to his ex. Of course they knew they weren't soulmates, but it had been reassuring being with someone else who had a strange facial soulmark. And Janus had been amazing at helping Virgil stay calm and focused enough to survive reasonably well despite near crippling anxiety.
That was until Virgil found out Janus had been lying about his soulmark for the three years they were together.
For three years, that snake had been covering up his activated soulmark with black makeup, making Virgil think he didn't know exactly who he was supposed to be with. All so he could live rent free and do almost nothing to contribute to their household, because Janus' actual soulmate wanted him to get a job. Sometimes, Virgil even wondered if the man he'd shared his bed with was actually gay.Â
The break up had left Virgil absolutely devastated, and Ryuk was the only good thing to come of the relationship. So he spoiled her as responsibly as he could, taking care of the only being who truly loved him.
Depressing. Welcome to the life of the most pathetic-
Ryuk mewled as if to chastise Virgil for delaying feeding her even longer. Virgil followed the little black kitten down to the kitchen, stretching and trying to forget the previous train of thought. He picked up Ryukâs personalized food dish (that had been an awkward request at Petâs Mart), dumping the few soggy pellets left over from the night before and giving the dish a good rinse. He rubbed it dry with a towel while Ryuk sat patiently at his feet, waiting for her food now that she knew Virgil was actually working on it.Â
He set the bowl on the counter and reached up to the cabinet where he kept her food. âSoon, pretty kitty. Just be patient for me,â he cooed at her, finding a small amount of pleasure in her responsive mew. He smiled until his hand hit nothing but the wooden shelf of the cabinet.
âWhat the-â Virgilâs attention snapped right back to the cabinet, swearing when he discovered that Ryuk had finished the last of their food stores last night. He groaned and glanced down at the expectant kitten, âI am so sorry- I forgot to stock up, baby.â
Ryuk tilted her head, not understanding why the magic food door wasnât providing her the food she desperately needed to survive in this house.
âShit- Iâll be right back-â Virgil stepped away from the counter, followed by a loud cat cry protest. He winced, hating to leave her wanting as he found a pair of ripped up black skinny jeans to throw on. The last thing he wanted right now was an impromptu shopping trip, but that was exactly what was happening.Â
Ryuk kept meowing as Virgil slipped on his favorite Converse and nudged her away from the door so he could leave. He locked the door and double checked by trying to open it before walking briskly down the sidewalk with head down.Â
Of course heâd forgotten his headphones to drown out the annoying shoppers around him. Virgilâs mood soured more with each step towards the store. It was truly shaping up to be a terrible day.
Virgil glanced around as he entered the store with his hood pulled all the way up. He felt acutely aware of how suspicious he looked right now. But that couldnât be helped. He just wanted to grab Ryukâs food and get out of there as soon as possible. He made a beeline for the Pets section, scanning the shelves for her preferred brand. He sighed in relief seeing there was one bag left. He bent down to pick it up when he heard a loud shrill whistle behind him.
âDay-um! What an ass! Is there another bag down there, sweet cheeks?â
Virgil inhaled sharply and stood up slowly, clutching the bag to his chest, âN-no, and I need this bag-â he balked at the acrid smell of pickle brine and sharp tangy iron coming from the barely dressed person standing far too close to him. He took a tentative step back toward the shelves.
âFuck! You just had to take that one- itâs the only brand that tastes any good! Canât your pooch or whatever settle for something else?â The person wearing what Virgil could only describe as a studded lime green bikini bottom and full body fishnets was staring at him, hands firmly on their hips. Virgil noted a nonbinary they/them pin before a wave of nausea washed over him as the smell intensified and mixed with a very deep seated feeling that this stranger was about to attack him over cat food.
âN-no, Ryuk only eats this,â He managed to stammer.
âWait- like from Death Note?â their eyes gleamed with recognition, âYou named your dog after a Shinigami?â
âSheâs a cat!â Virgil exclaimed, taking another backward step and gulping as his back hit the edges of the shelving behind him, knocking a few bags off, âplease- please leave me alone-â
âHey, Iâm just trying to negotiate here,â they complained, stepping closer instead. Virgil could feel tears welling up in his eyes as his terror skyrocketed.
âGo- leave- please leave me alone-â He whispered as they stepped right up in his face. He felt his logical brain shutting down, wishing he wasnât pinned against the shelves so he could run.Â
âWhoa- for one, youâre really cute,â The stranger smiled a strange wide grin, âIâd love to get to know you- wait- are you crying? What the shit?â
Virgilâs knees buckled underneath him and he slid the ground, clutching the cat food like it was his only lifeline. His breathing was rapid and shallow as he curled in on himself, praying the stranger would go away.Â
âWoah, buddy, I didnât mean-â
The stench of the rude stranger with zero sense of personal boundaries increased tenfold and Virgil felt as if he was about to pass out.Â
â â â Â
Remus stared at the emo laying in the fetal position at their feet. Goddamn it theyâd been trying to come across less creepy when they were flirting. They crouched down and tried to gently push the manâs hood off his face to see if he was still conscious.Â
How the fuck did things like this keep happening to Remus?
They saw the tears slipping down the manâs cheek. Oh fuck-
âWoah, buddy, I didnât mean-â
The emo clutched at the bag of cat food and didnât even respond to their voice. Remus figured the best way to help would be to help him ground himself so they could apologize for being so terrifying. Not that they were trying to be scary. If people were scared of them, that was their problem and Remus would not take responsibility for it.Â
They kneeled in front of the man and reached out slowly, âhey- can you take a deep breath with me? Shit dude, I really didnât mean to scare you over a bag of kibble-â When the man didnât respond, only crying softly and breathing like a bunny, Remus inhaled and swore under their breath. Fuck Fuck Fuck. What would a smart person do? Remus sighed. If they knew that answer, they wouldn't be in this predicament in the first place.Â
Gently they reached to cup the manâs face, wiping their thumbs at the tears staining his bottom eyelids. No sooner had Remus touched the man than his hand came up to smack his wrist away. Remus gasped and pulled back, their palms and wrist stinging.
Remus rubbed their wrist and harrumphed, âIâm just trying to help!â They glanced back at the stranger and gasped. Shimmery purple glowed beneath what looked like several layers of makeup on the manâs face. It spread from under his eyes to all the way down his neck. Remus stared, absolutely transfixed. Of course they had seen activated soulmarks before. But theyâd never caused an activationâŚ
Remas gasped again and spread their palms out in front of them. They started in disbelief at the green shimmery swirls that settled into a Lichtenberg figure before their eyes. They knew soulmarks sometimes formed into patterns that represented the soulmate. They looked back at the man on the ground to find him staring at his fingers, the ones heâd used to smack Remus away.
âHoly shit-âÂ
âRead my mind, emo. Whatâs your name?â
The man blinked up at Remus as if taking them in for the first time.
âOh- Oh itâs really youâŚâ
Remus grinned, âyeah- sorry that was so stressful.â
âI- yeah, but itâs fine,â the man shrugged, âIâm⌠MyNameIsVirgil,â he rushed out and Remus grinned, âhe/him, by the way. I saw your pin.â
Remus nodded, âthank you, Virgil. Remus. God, I want to see your mark without all that makeup⌠but maybe thatâs a second date idea.â
Virgil laughed sharply, âthatâs assuming thereâs a first!â
âThere better be! I have got to meet this shinigami pussy thatâs been stealing my food!â
âYou⌠eat cat food? For real?â
Remus shrugged, âItâs cheap. Please?â
Virgil sat up and offered Remus his hand, âwhatâs with the ninja stars?â
Remus broke into raucous laughter, âOh Fuck! Lolo is not gonna believe this-â
Virgil squinted, âWho? No. Too much to process right now. Um.. could you please let me get up?â
Remus scooted away on the linoleum floor, giving Virgil space to get his legs beneath him. They stood and offered Virgil a hand, subtly showing off the lightning soulmark.Â
âWoah- oh thatâs- is gorgeous okay?â Virgil asked, staring at the mark.
âYeah, for sure.â Remus nodded and offered again to help him up. âLetâs go pay and talk this out at your place.â
Virgil paused a long moment before eventually nodding in agreement. He took their hand and stood, admiring how they held his hand gently yet still supported him enough to get up. Remus twisted the hold to interlock their fingers with his. Something about the gesture felt incredibly comforting.Â
Virgil smiled weakly and followed him to the checkout. His heart was still racing, but he suspected for a different reason now.Â
The real test would be how Ryuk took to this new person.Â
â â â
Virgil stood in his bathroom with the door ajar, carefully wiping the makeup off his soul mark while Remus played with Ryuk in the living room. She very much enjoyed snagging her claws on their fishnets and they seemed absolutely delighted with the kitten. Virgil sighed softly and kept wiping away at the layers, marveling as sparkly purple tentacles revealed themselves, twisting and turning all over the previously dead black area. His lip trembled and the rag dropped from his fingers.
He met his actual soulmate, and theyâd turned his greatest fear and shame into something so beautiful.
Remus gasped from behind him, staring in the mirror at the swirly purple soulmark. âOh my god- Virge-â
Virgil smiled back at them in the mirror before turning to face them, âYes?â
âYouâre super pretty now- and that ass is still magnificent. Do- do you want to date?â
âLetâs get to know each other a bit better before getting all official with labels,â Virgil chuckled, reaching to pull Remus close.Â
Ryuk mewed and headbutted at Remusâ leg, feeling left out of the family hug. Both of them grinned and Virgil let her climb him back up to his shoulder before hugging Remus close.
eyo trans rights someone mentioned doing trans sides and I am the right author for that lmao janus is flipping of transphobes dispassionately because he cares about their opinion that little.Â
Hereâs the links: Plea for My New Self  A Whole Castle  Slopes
I might do another with some other identities I have a wide variety to choose from
Slight body horror, swearing. Remus is nonbinary and uses they/them pronouns.
Ao3 || Tumblr main
Logan and Remus had just settled into bed, ready for sleep when Remus whispered, barely audible, "Do you only love me 'cause I'm like my brother?"
Logan stiffened at the mention of Remus's estranged twin - and Logan's ex-boyfriend.
"Never mind, it was stupid, I'll shut up now. Goodnight Logie," Remus mumbled after a beat of silence had passed.
"Of course not," Logan said, regaining his wits. "Why would you think so?"
"Well, I mean, I know I'm just the worse version of him, and he has already moved on and gotten with someone new, so like, if you had been missing himâŚ" Remus didn't finish their thought.
"Falsehood," Logan replied firmly. "First of all, I am the one who broke up with Roman because he had feelings for another. It was a kindness for both of us, and by the time we began dating, I had long since moved on. Secondly, you are not the lesser version of Roman. Despite being twins, the two of you are quite different. You are your own person with your own personality, not any version of someone else, and I love you because of who you are."
Remus hummed, but a glance at their face showed that they were not convinced.
Logan held in a sad sigh. "You and your brother can be similar, yes," Logan conceded. "You're both creative, arrogant, insecure, and stubborn. But you both have major differences as well. He wears his emotions on his sleeve, whereas you pretend to be emotionally open. Truthfully, you are so much deeper than you seem. You act tough, but I know that you're kind. Anyone who's seen you with children would agree. You are incredibly empathetic and you are so beautiful. Youâre much more unpredictable than him. Roman is also much more prideful than you. He's pettier and he can hold a grudge like there's no tomorrow."
Remus chuckled at that.
"You forgive much easier and you're more modest, although you pretend as if you believe every compliment others give you. Even now you may be fabricating reasons to disprove my statements." Logan rubbed circles into Remus's shoulders.
Remus winced at his words, proving that Logan was correct. A light, embarrassed pink dusted Remus's cheeks.
"If you don't believe me, I'll have to keep telling you until you do. Repetition is the best strategy for memorization. I'm rarely wrong, you know." Logan pressed a sweet kiss to the top of Remus's head.
"True," Remus admitted, humming. âWell, except for that one time-â
âI said rarely!â Logan interrupted. He took a deep, steadying breath as Remus giggled.
âCan⌠Can you tell me more reasons you love me?â Remus asked anxiously.
Logan looked down at his partnerâs face and saw an aching, bleeding vulnerability and a desire for love and validation. He laid his cheek on top of Remusâs head, looking up at the ceiling with his partner held in his arms. Remus sighed, the small sound ringing with contentment.
âOf course, my love,â Logan replied, squeezing their hand. âI love your ferocity. I love your protective instinct. Such as the instance with Virgil yesterday. It was very brave and kind of you.â
Remus growled at the mention of yesterdayâs incident. âThose men were pathetic little rat shits. Who fucks up a teenager?â
âI know,â Logan agreed. âThey were quite awful. You were able to, ah, create an imposition, rather swiftly.â
Remus cackled. âDid you see how that blonde guy ran away? And the dude with the stupid Matrix glasses? His nose broke so easily. And there was blood, running down his face and all over my knuckles. It painted the floor until I was drowning in it and I was suffocating, but it was fun-â
âRemus,â Logan said gently, tapping his partnerâs forehead.
âThereâs nothing to apologize for,â Logan replied.
Remus nodded, the motion limited by Loganâs position. âUh, what- what else?â
Logan smiled to himself. âI love it when youâre painting or writing and you complete your work. Youâre so proud of yourself and I love it because you deserve it. You deserve everything because you work so hard. I love it when the clock or the toaster breaks and you try to fix it yourself, but only end up breaking it more and you have to ask me for help. Itâs funny to see the guilty and ashamed yet defiant look that comes across your face.
âWell I love it when you fix stuff around the house!â Remus burst out.
Rather than address Remusâs declaration, Logan deflected with a joke. âYouâre dating a mechanical engineer and his only use is to fix the fire alarm?â
Remus scowled. âNo, not that. Itâs like⌠when youâre fixing random shit you get this cute little concentrated face and you kinda stick your tongue out a tiny bit.â
âI do?â Logan wondered how heâd never noticed.
âYeah.â Remus nodded. âIt makes the whole âasking for helpâ bullshit worth it.â
âHuh,â Logan said, surprised. He kissed the top of Remusâs hair softly, burying his face in their silky locks to hide his faint blush.
âOh, and youâll sometimes walk me through what youâre doing. Your voice is so pretty, I could literally listen to it for hours. If you were teaching all my classes, every class would be so much more enjoyable,â Remus told him, smiling.
Logan could see the edges of that smile through the corner of his eye, and he desperately wanted to kiss that smile and open it, kiss Remus until they were both breathless, but he didnât want to disturb their peace.
âAnd, shit, Logan, youâre so smart. Youâre literally the smartest person I know.â
Logan chuckled dismissively. âI doubt that.â
âNo, Iâm serious. Youâre basically a genius. Especially compared to me.â Remus turned so he was facing Logan and wrapped their arms around their boyfriend, burying their face in his chest. Loganâs arms moved to hold them more securely.
âYouâre calling me a genius? Weâve both seen what you can do with a makeup brush, or a paintbrush, or a pencil, or, truthfully, any medium.â Logan kissed the top of their head. Perhaps heâd been doing that a lot, but Remus had hidden their face in Loganâs chest, and he couldnât not kiss them.
âYouâre just saying that,â Remus denied bashfully. Despite their denial, Logan knew they were pleased. Their creativity was a major source of pride for them.
âIf it was a falsehood, you wouldnât be top of your classes,â Logan reminded them pointedly.
âI guessâŚâ Remus sighed. They nuzzled into Logan, who melted.
Remusâs heart felt so full it might burst. It would be cool if it did. Their chest would be blown up and their ribs would be broken and there would be blood painting these pillows and their skin would be torn open. Would Logan scream? He probably would, most people would scream if someoneâs heart burst.
But Remusâs heart stayed in their chest, decidedly not ruining this perfect moment with blood and gore.
Remus giggled to himself at the thought.
âWhat is it, dear?â Logan asked, curiously.
Remus laughed again. âNothing. Just happy.â
âI love you,â Logan murmured.
Remus lifted their head to meet Loganâs eyes. âI love you too,â they replied, and Logan finally got his wish of kissing them senseless.
Fandom: Sanders Sides
Characters: Janus, Remus, Roman
Rating: Teen & up
Relationships: Dukeceit, CreativitwinsÂ
Warnings: Not much to warn for in this one. Language, a little bit of suggestiveness, vague non-detailed descriptions of a horror movie.Â
Word count: 3402
Read on AO3!
My writing masterpost
Starlight Universe masterpost
Dukeceit Week 2021
start - previous - here - next - masterpost
Summary: A movie night date leads to an important conversation. Already being t4t makes it a lot easier.
Or, in Remus's own words, âThis is just, like, going to be a week of people coming out to me, I guess. Huh.â
Notes: Day 6 of Dukeceit Week 2021! Almost there! @dukeceitweek Takes place in my Starlight Universe, where each piece can be read without any context. Takes place 9 months after college; at the start of the story, Janus uses only they/them pronouns.Â
--Â
âOoh, popcorn! Can I have some?â Roman popped his head into the kitchen of the apartment he, Remus, and Logan had shared in the nine or so months since they had all graduated college.
âNo, Jan and I are having a date in twenty minutes,â Remus said, waving Roman off without looking away from the air popper.
âOkay, I donât see how thatâs relevant to my question.â Roman pushed himself to sit on the counter by the sink. âI mean, thatâs really cute, I hope you have fun. But can I have some popcorn?â
Remus rolled his eyes. âMake your own when Iâm done.â
âBut you make it better!â Roman pouted overdramatically.
Remus raised an eyebrow. âAll I do is plug in the machine?â
âRight, which is better than me doing it.â Roman grinned at them. âLess work for me.â
âHey!â Remus swatted his arm. âThe transphobia, honestlyââ
âWell, if you making it for me is transphobic to you, then you not making it for me isââ Roman broke off quite suddenly, his expression undergoing several shifts very fast that Remus could not make sense of. Which was⌠unusual, to say the least. Roman was normally the one person they could always count on understanding. They didnât like this new development one bit.
âRo?â
âIiiiiitâs⌠queerphobic to me,â Roman said at last, a worried pinch to his eyebrows. He laughed, and it almost didnât sound forced. âSo weâre at a tie, so you should just make me popcorn.â
âFirst of all, Iâm queer too, make your own damn popcorn. Secondââ Remus turned away from the popcorn machine and gave Roman his full attention, leaning back against the kitchen island and tilting his head to the side. âDo you wanna talk about whatever the fuck that was?â So far as Remus knew, Roman was bi; that was the label heâd been using for years and years, so long that it practically felt like forever. Since almost the very beginning of high school. Since before Remus had questioned their gender, even. Only last week, heâd called the light switch biphobic without hesitation when it broke.
Whatever had happened to make him so very deliberately not call himself bi just now, it was new.
Romanâs expression closed up very fast indeed, but not before Remus caught a flash of something he was almost certain was fear. âNo.â
âYou know itâs okay to question, right?â Remus inquired awkwardly. âNo matter what specifically, and no matter what the outcome is? Yeah?â
âI donât want to talk about it.â
âYou know Iâd still love you no matter what, right? Even if you were, like, a straight manâlike, I would make so many jokes about not agreeing with your lifestyle, butâRo, you know everything is always gonna be okay, right?â
Roman glared at him. âRemus, I donât want to talk about it.â He wrinkled his nose. âAnd Iâm definitely not straight.â
Remus blinked and raised their hands. âAlright. I didnât mean literally straight, I just meantâyou could be literally whatever, and it would be cool. That wasâlikeâthe most extreme example I could think of, you know?â
Roman let out a slight huff of laughter. âThanks,â he said reluctantly after a pause. âItâs nothing, though.â
âBullshit,â Remus said immediately.
âItââ Roman swallowed. âI need it to be nothing, okay?â
âIf anyoneâs making you feel shitty, Iâll beat them up,â Remus said immediately. âEven if itâs Patton. Just drop the names. Iâll do it. Iâllââ
âRemus, itâs fine. I want to stop fucking talking about it now!â Roman snapped.
Remus hesitated, fumbling for what to do or say next, everything about the conversation feeling just a little wrong and sideways.
Roman sighed. âSorry.â He pushed off the counter, went to the fridge, and stared into it for a solid thirty seconds, then took a cheese stick out of the door. âIâll make my own popcorn later,â he mumbled and retreated back to his room.
âDamn, alright,â Remus said to the empty room. âBe like that, I guess.â They flung their hands into the air and went to get the butter theyâd been melting in the microwave before Romanâs appearance.
Roman would talk to them about it, whatever it was, eventually. He always did. And whatever was bugging him, Remus would figure out a way to bug it back until it stopped and Roman was all happy and bubbly again. Because that was what Remus always did. It would be fine. It was just a waiting game.
Remus sighed. He always hated waiting.
***
âMmkay,â Remus said, when Janus had arrived, and they had worked together to move the TV out of the living room and into Remusâs room, and they had settled in on Remusâs bedâRemus sitting up against the headboard and Janus half-laying in Remusâs lap with their long thin legs stretched out along the bed and their head on his chestâand the popcorn had been set beside them where they could both reach it, and the blanket nest had been fluffed once more. âWhat shall we watch?â
Janus was silent for a long moment. Actually, come to think of it, they had been quiet since theyâd arrived at the apartmentâeven more quiet than usual. But Remus was almost certain they werenât nonverbal, seeing as they had exchanged a few fond words with him. It just hadnât been very many words.
âJanny, baby?â Remus leaned forward, over their shoulder, trying to catch a glimpse of their face.
Janus had their fingers knotted in the blanket that was spread over their lap, fidgeting with it anxiously, a thinking-hard expression on their face.
âBaby?â Remus curled one hand lightly around theirs. âYou good?â
âChoices are too hard right now,â Janus said at last.
âOkay, thatâs okay. Do you know what you need?â
âI want to watch a movie.â Janus frowned. âI just canât choose.â
âGotcha. No problem.â Remus pressed a kiss to their cheek. âIâm really good at choosing.â He threaded his fingers through Janusâs long hair, scratching soothingly at their scalp in just the way he knew they liked, and pulled up the library of movies, switching from Romanâs profile to his own.
âHowâs some really cheesy horrible horror film we can make fun of sound?â he asked, scrolling with the remote and still playing with Janusâs hair with his other hand. âI know we have a bunch of those, I loved âem when we were kids and I think theyâre funny.â
âThat sounds fine.â Janus nodded and relaxed a little further against Remus.
âGood.â He kissed the top of their head. âDo you need anything else?â
Janus shook their head. âIâve just been kind of stressed lately. Workâs been shit, and all that. Itâs fine. I just want to cuddle and things.â
âOoh, âand things,â I like the sound of that,â Remus teased, sliding his hand gently to their chin and drawing them to twist around far enough that he could kiss them soft and slow.
âI didnât say what kinds of things,â Janus said innocently, their eyes still closed and so close to Remus that their lips brushed against his as they spoke. âPerhaps I could be persuaded later.â
âIâll be sure to prepare my best arguments,â Remus said, leaning slightly up to kiss their forehead and then back down to their lips for another lazy kiss, taking his time and exploring Janusâs mouth until they sighed and melted against him.
âA compelling preview,â they murmured, their eyes still closed and the slightest smile curling at their lips.
Remus meant to make some kind of witty quip in return, really he did, but all that came out of his mouth was a quiet, awed, âHoly fuck, youâre so beautiful, Jan.â
Janusâs eyes opened and met his for a moment, soft and vulnerable, before they turned and hid their face in his neck. âLove you,â they whispered against his skin.
âMm, I love you too,â Remus said happily, wrapping his arms securely around Janus and kissing the top of their head. âLove your pretty eyes and skin and hair and body, love how clever you are, love your scary goth clothes, love your snark, love your stims, love youââ
Janus whined wordlessly into his neck, pressing kisses to it and fisting their hands in the front of his shirt.
Remus chuckled, taking a handful of their hair and gently tugging until they looked up at him once more. âDo you want to watch a movie at all, or do you just wanna make out? Cause Iâd be good with either, but if you wanna do a movie, we should get on that before weâre too distracted.â
âOh.â Janus leaned their head back a little until it was resting against Remusâs hand. âNot that I donât want to make out, butââ
âNah, I gotcha. Gotta at least get through the popcorn, am I right?â Remus cast about for the remote, lost in the blanket pile, as Janus shifted about until they faced the television again.
âThere it is!â Remus snatched the remote up, clicking through the library on the television until he saw the particular film he was thinking of and pulled it up. âThis look good?â
ââWhen moving into their new house, little do our protagonists know it is haunted by a demonic serial killer. Will they get out in time? Or will they be his next victims?ââ Janus read the summary aloud. âSounds absolutely thrilling. Extremely original. Love the bad Photoshop on the cover. Iâm sure the acting will be of the highest quality.â
âOh, yeah, itâs so shitty, I love it. So many cheesy effects and fake blood, itâs the actual stupidest shit,â Remus assured them. âI love it, though. Went as the demon thing for Halloween when I was nine. Nobody fucking knew what I was, but I had the time of my life. And got fake blood on Roman when he wasnât looking. It was great.â
Janus chuckled, reaching up to brush their fingertips against Remusâs cheek. âWell, with such a glowing review from someone so attractive, how can I resist?â they said fondly.
âThatâs the spirit!â Remus hit play.
Remus had watched this particular movie more times than they could count over the course of their childhood. He peppered commentary throughout the film:
âThis is my favorite part, if you pay attention you can see her real fingertips holding onto the fake hand sheâs about to get chopped off!â
âThereâs a jumpscare in this scene, I know you hate thoseâokay, hit the skip-ten-seconds button in three, two, there. Perfect. Dumbass demon movie canât even trust itself to be creepy without cheap scares.â
âLook, I know the mom is supposed to have some kind of hot blonde thing going on for the horny straight men in the audience, but sheâs got nothing on you.â
âFor some reason they made a directorâs commentary and it actually includes the fake blood recipe they used, Iâll show you sometime!â
Janus, in turn, provided brilliant, extremely snarky roasts, mostly of either the actorsâ absolute lack of skill or the gaping plot holes:
âOh, yes, going alone to the attic at midnight without so much as a candle is a fantastic idea, nothing bad could possibly happen in this scene.â
âListen, I can excuse the children because theyâre about eight years old, but do you think this man has ever even heard of acting? Or even, like, speaking in a non-monotone?â
âI am truly fascinated by the special effects departmentâs understanding of human anatomy.â
âSo, the demon feeds on misery? Why hasnât it taken up residence in a large office building? I mean, come on, hundreds of souls in an environment designed to grind out constant levels of misery? Itâs perfect. The poor thing must be starving out here in the two-point-five-kids-and-a-dog suburbs, every meal it gets is tiny. I would be so much better at its job than it is.â
At last the credits rolled.
âWanna see pictures of the costume I made?â Remus asked.
âSure.â Janus sounded amused.
âLemme justââ Remus scrolled through their camera roll for a minute. âOh, here they are.â They displayed their phone to Janus; tiny nine-year-old Remus, who sported long tangled brown hair in two ponytails, was draped in a black curtain, donated by his great-aunt, that he had very enthusiastically taken a pair of scissors to to create a tattered effect; the curtain was splattered with bright red goo, and tiny Remus had a pair of plastic knives in his hands, which were blurry in almost every photo because theyâd hardly stopped making stabbing motions all evening. To their right, their little sister Gabby, whoâd been six at the time, was dressed as Elastigirl and making a punching motion; to their right, Romanâwho had already been a full three inches taller than Remus, even at nineâwas wearing a Belle dress with a poofy skirt and a sword strapped around his waist and a huge smile that was missing one front tooth.
Remus swiped through the photos; a delightful scene unfolded, as tiny Remus posed for a few pictures, then in one was blurrily turning towards Roman, then dumping something on him, then Roman was screaming and Remus was laughing as red goo dripped down the poofy yellow skirt; Gabby watched with both hands clapped over her mouth, eyes huge.
âYou two really have not changed at all, have you?â Janus asked, stifling laughter.
âAbsolutely not,â Remus agreed with an answering laugh. âI think the most that either of us ever changed was when I chopped off all that hair and dyed it green.â
âWhen was that?â Janus asked.
âSophomore year of high school. I did not have permission to chop it all off, but I did get permission to dye it afterwards, so that was pretty sick.â
âAnd that didnât go against dress code?â Janus inquired.
âNo, actually. Not sure how. But I bet my parents wouldâve kicked up a big stink about it if the school tried and made me change it; they were always super big on self expression and shit.â Remus gestured towards the picture, indicating tiny Roman in his princess dress. âWe always got to wear whatever we wanted, and shit like that. It was nice. Made gender shit way easier when that became a thing for me, you know?â
âIt sounds nice,â Janus said softly. âIâm happy you had that.â
Remus nodded and pressed a kiss to their forehead, reaching for a handful of the popcorn dregs in the bottom of the bowl.
Janus shifted in their arms, rolling over to face Remus and propping themself up on their elbows. âActually,â they began.
Something on their face told Remus that whatever this new topic of conversation was, it was important. He swallowed the half-chewed popcorn in his mouth. âYeah, baby?â
âSpeaking of gender.â Janus picked at the edge of the blanket.
âI love speaking of that, go on.â Remus tousled Janusâs hair fondly.
Janus took a deep breath, staring at the blanket in their hands. âI want to start using he pronouns again. In addition to my regular ones. Or.â They wrinkled their nose. âMy current ones, I guess. So, he/they.â
âThatâs great, he/they pronouns are very sexy,â Remus said at once.
Janus laughed, looking up at him at last. âThatâs true, you are the sexiest person I know,â he said fondly. A shadow passed over his features. âBut,â he went on slowly, chewing on the inside of their lip and picking at the blanket once more.
âYeah?â Remus encouraged.
âI really donât like the idea of telling anyone else about that.â Janus grimaced. âI keep worrying Iâll get asked stupid questions about âoh, so are you a man again now?â whenâlikeâno, and I never was one in the first place. So.â
âOh, that sounds gross,â Remus agreed at once. âI can see why youâd be worried about that.â
Janus nodded. âI justâI donât want to explain. And I donât want people to ask questions. And they might. And I justâI don't want any of it. I want to skip to the part where they know and itâs all how I want it to be.â
âThatâs reasonable,â Remus agreed. âBut, I mean, if they can get me using he/they pronouns and being nonbinary, they had better fucking wrap their minds around the concept of you doing it too. Yeah? Or Iâll make âem. Violently, if you want.â
Janus snorted. âI appreciate the offer, darling.â They reached up and touched his cheek. âI⌠donât know if I want to tell anyone else yet. But I did want to tell you.â
âYou got it, cutie.â Remus booped Janusâs nose once. âJust let me know if anything changes. Iâll punch people for you. Anytime. They donât even have to have done anything. Just point me at them and consider it done.â
Janus did laugh at that, outright, scrunching up his face and burying it in Remusâs chest. âI should not be this into you offering to punch people for me,â he said wryly.
Remus grinned and flipped their hair. âNah, I think itâs definitely very sexy of me and should absolutely turn you on.â
Janus smacked Remusâs arm. âI did not say that!â
âYou implied it.â
âNot⌠necessarily. That was one possible interpretationââ
âOh, right, I see, mmhm, very interesting.â
They smacked his arm again. âYouâre teasing me.â
âOnly a little bit. Youâre so pretty when you get all flustered.â Remus bent their head at a somewhat awkward angle to kiss Janusâs lips gently. âAre there any new words you want me to use, by the way?â they asked. âBesides updating pronouns?â
Janus tilted his head to the side, considering. âI think⌠I still like all the sorts of things you call me already. Pretty, and partner, andâand baby, and so on.â
Remus smirked. âThatâs good, I like calling you baby.â
âOh my god, shut up.â Janus hid their face in their hands.
âWhy, baby?â Remus asked innocently.
Janus made a strangled noise, and after a pause carried on. âI do think I wouldnât mind adding a little bit of⌠masc terminology? I guess? If that makes sense? Adding that into the mix. Not all the time, and not as much as the things you already call me, but⌠just a bit would be nice.â
âGotcha.â Remus nodded. âI can do that. So, like, my baby is very pretty and handsome?â
Janusâs cheeks went bright red in an instant, and he hid his face in Remusâs chest again, letting out a tiny wordless scream. âYes. That. Thatâthatâs nice,â they managed after a pause, sounding almost entirely composed.
Remus chuckled and ran their fingers through Janusâs hair. âGood to know,â he said teasingly. âI will definitely keep this in mind.â
âOh my god,â Janus mumbled. âAre you trying to kill me?â
âAbsolutely, but only in a sexy way of making you happy.â Remus kissed the top of their head. âThis is just, like, going to be a week of people coming out to me, I guess,â they mused. âHuh.â
âWhat do you mean?â
âOh, somethingâs clearly eating at someone else we know, and I think theyâre going to tell me about whatever it is within the week. Thatâs all. It was just funny timing.â Remus kissed the top of Janusâs head again. âSo, the movieâs over,â they noted, which, sure, was a blatant and deliberate change of subject, but he felt this was justified, both for avoiding-speculating-about-Romanâs-personal-information purposes and, more importantly, for fun-after-movie-things purposes.
âThat it is,â Janus said, a particular innocent tone entering their voice. Excellent, he was of a similar mind to Remus, then.
Remus grinned and drew them up for a kiss. âSo, what does the very pretty and handsome and lovely human in my arms want to do now?â he inquired.
Janus made another small, wordless, flustered noise and promptly dragged Remus into another kiss. âYou canât just say things like that!â
âWhat, about how youâre the loveliestâprettiestâsexiestââ Remus pressed tiny kisses to Janusâs lips with each word, until at last they caught his lips with their own in a proper kiss to shut him up. âPretty sure I can say it, actually,â Remus murmured against his lips. âCause itâs true.â
âOh, like youâre one to talk,â Janus said, sounding very pleased indeed, and kissed them again.
--
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An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
"Person A has the power to see/sense injuries (anything from bruises to broken bones to hypothermia). They meet Person B when they see suspicious or worrying injuries on them as they walk past each other."
Sirius passes the fit Remus on the street and feels their pain, like they'd been "torn apart and stitched back together" and decides to chat them up.
Both Remus and Sirius use he/they pronouns and I switch between them both throughout.
hi sorry to bother but i was wondering if you could do a nonbinary/trans punk Remus mood-board if thats alright , thank you for your time :) i hope you have a wonderful week or weekend
Of course! I need to catch up on some aesthetic requests today if I can.