#noggin

April 1st, 2009, the end of the reign of a show called “Chomp Socks”. It was a tragic day back when I was a kiddo. Does anyone even remember this show? Just thinking about it makes me feel old. Chomp Socks was definitely a strange show to say the least. It was the kind of show that kids loved and parents hated, like Barney & Friends or Teletubbies. Utter nonsense with the creepiest mascots ever known to man. Chomp Socks was basically the embodiment of this trope. Great for the kids, and absolutely horrible for the parents. 

Chomp Socks was about these two sock puppets that were literally just photoshopped fuzzy socks with googly eyes and weirdly human looking teeth. The main protagonists were Fluffer and Noggin. Fluffer was made from two socks positioned together so it looked like he had an actual mouth. Fluffer was often seen as the adventurer who carried the show along, talking to the audience and discussing basic concepts like friendship and family. Noggin was the stupid one of the duo, just one big sock with teeth but no mouth formation. She never spoke, only grunted over enthusiastically whenever she got distracted by some silly little thing.

I remember back then that my favorite episode was something along the lines of them playing hide-and-seek at the park. Noggin was terrible at the game, and kid-me thought it was hilarious. Fluffer always managed to find her and even said she was terrible at the game. This made Noggin sad, prompting Fluffer to think about his actions and apologize. Innocent stuff basically every kid’s show explores.

I have some weird memories from watching the show. I never understood why my mother hated it. She’d constantly tell my grandmother that it was a revolting show and not suitable for someone my age. Maybe she was just spooked by the socks’ appearances cuz those teeth were kinda gross, but other than that, nothing inappropriate really sticks out in my mind. She was probably just being one of those mothers from back in the day who believed all children’s cartoons and shows were works of the Devil. She was (and I quote) a “very holy lady”. 

I still laugh when I think of grandma saying “Barb, preach to some other morally obstinate junkie. The Lord is with us and Milo is a baby. Let him watch the darn show.”

Grandma was spicy and went on to curse some more as she gambled on a football team. These days, I like to say she was the real life equivalent of Sheldon Cooper’s Meemaw. I think that tells ya enough about her.

I wonder what happened to Chomp Socks… It was so good. I keep trying to find it again, but it’s completely vanished off the face of the planet. Maybe that was the April Fools prank that year. Chomp Socks would be gone forever.

Y’all remember Clay from Playhouse Disney??? And Noggin? Moose A. Moose and Zee! I miss them so much

"is it because he doesn't talk?"