#noah:drabble

Not that Creedance thought his mother would cause any harm to his boyfriend. On the contrary, he was fairly certain she would adore him and he had told Noah as such at least a dozen times.

Yet nothing he had been told had prepared Noah for rounding the corner of his home to find a woman that looked younger than Creedance, perched on the back of the couch and grinning at him.

"You must be Noah," she greeted, hopping off the back of the couch and offering her hand.

She was petite, everything out of her mouth had seemed genuinely friendly, and her body language was relaxed, open, and yet every hair on the back of Noah's neck was raised.

"I-I am. Are you one of Cree's siblings?" He hadn't mentioned any of his siblings coming down, but she didn't look nearly old enough to be his mother.

"Oh, a smooth talker. No, hardly. I would be his mom. Belladonna, Bells if I like you well enough. Cree's told me enough that I'd go with Bells," she laughed, introducing herself almost properly. "I'm guessing my son didn't mention my, uh, distaste for doors and knocking?"

"Yeah, he did neglect to mention that," Noah agreed as he finally shook her hand. The feel of her energy felt almost like pins and needles and he had to resist the urge to wipe his hand on his jeans when he pulled back. "Can I get you anything to eat or drink? Creedance should be home in about thirty minutes or so," he offered, trying his best to be a good host. His auntie would tear him a new one if she thought he had been impolite, even with the situation at hand.

"Nah, I text Cree about 10 minutes ago and told him to pick a local diner with good breakfast food. My treat. As soon as he answered, I dropped his dad off there and Creedance will be meeting up with us."

Her son had, quite bluntly, told her not to freak Noah out, but she hadn't quite been able to resist the temptation. He had handled it better than she had expected though and it had definitely earned him some respect.

"I think I can manage that but I can't let you pay," he protested weakly, still trying to get his thoughts straight.

"Nonesense. It's the least I can do after startling you. You can cook or pay next time if it'll make you feel better."

Still, standing inside the cabin he had built with Noah was almost painful. Creedance had left so much behind when he left and seeing it all still in the same place, minus the shirts he assumed Noah had been sleeping in, was enough to have him almost doubled over as the guilt slammed into him.

He could smell Noah on everything, but underneath that familiar scent was one sharp and bitter. The emotional state his ex had been in since he left was hard to miss and he couldn’t help but hate himself a little for it.

This was his fault and he had to face those consequences, no matter how it played out.

Ari had drug him out of the house for a bit, making sure he was reminded that there were still so many people that cared about him, so Noah hadn’t seen the truck and trailer until he headed back to the cabin. With Cree not being a wolf, he hadn’t done as well in the full pack setting, so they had settled on just outside of the main area in a smaller clearing. It was still plenty close enough to the pack for Noah’s comfort but just far enough away that Creedance didn’t feel crowded.

Rounding the corner and seeing his ex’s truck, the trailer he had lived out of before they built the cabin in tow had his heart stopping for what felt like an eternity, even if it had only skipped a single beat. 

He wanted so badly to believe what he was seeing, that it meant Cree had come back to him, but he didn’t want to let himself hope, not if it all it was going to do was rip him apart at the seams again. 

There was a moment of hesitation before he opened the door with shaking hands, standing on the threshold of the home they had built together, Cree’s shirt looking almost baggy on him with how much weight he had lost over the last year. He was putting it back on, but it was a slow process. 

“Cree?”

Creedance stood on the opposite side of the living room, the black cowboy hat he usually wore held in his hands, knuckles white from the grip on it. He knew he was going to mess up the brim, but he couldn’t quite bring himself to care at that moment. 

“Hey,” was all he could get out. It wasn’t enough, not nearly so, but he wasn’t sure how Noah was going to react to him actually being there and the last thing he wanted to do was upset him more than he already had.

Tears burned at the wolf’s eyes, lower lip trembling as he took a step forward, the open door forgotten for the time being. 

“Are you really here?”

He had dreamed far too many times of coming through the door to find Creedance there and he wanted so badly for it to be real, for Cree to have actually come back to him.

He nodded, swallowing hard as he set the hat on a hook next to the doorway. He had put it there when they first built the place, not liking having his hats too close to the front door but never one for wearing it inside when he could help it. 

“Yeah, I’m really here.”

“For...for how long?” Noah asked, trying not to break down entirely. He wasn’t sure he could do this all over again. Watching Creedance walk out that door once was more than enough.

Cree was quiet as he tried to force himself to meet Noah’s gaze, needing to be the one to break first. “For as long as you’ll let me stay.”

Those words had the dam breaking and the wolf darted forward, arms wrapping around the other tightly as he buried his face against his neck, body shaking as he wept. 

“Don’t leave me again, please don’t ever leave me again. I don’t want to be without you,” he choked out, fingers gripping at Cree like he was the last solid thing on the face of the earth.

“I won’t, I won’t, Noah, I’m so sorry,” he murmured, holding him just as tightly, silent tears cutting tracks down his face. “I never should have left in the first place and I’m so sorry I put you through that.”

“Why did you leave me like that, Cree? Why did you walk away?”

He had been expecting that question and he couldn’t fault Noah for needing to ask it. He had spent the first couple of months telling himself it was for the best, that they would both move on but he couldn’t have been more wrong. The longer he was away, the worst he felt.

“I panicked, Noah. I realized I was going to outlive you by probably centuries and I thought it would hurt so much less to walk away then than to build an entire life with you and then lose you. I know I fucked up and I wouldn’t blame you if never forgave me for it,” he rambled, the words spilling out of him faster than he could think, but Noah deserved the truth.

“What changed?” There was a hesitance to his tone when Noah asked, finally pulling back enough to look at Creedance’s face, needing to see if he was telling the truth or not.

“My ma, believe it or not. She’s kind of in the same place but she said she would take that pain when it came because at least she got to spend however many years she might have with my dad with him instead of wonderin’ what if. I don’t want those regrets, not when I love you.”

Noah had met his mom on a couple of occasions and he wasn’t surprised by that. Bells had a weird sense of logic to her despite, well, everything else about her. He had never met a more contradictory person, but she had been warm and bright, full of teasing laughter and joy every time she came down to visit and he could see why Hawk loved her. 

Watching Cree’s parents had given Noah a deep insight as to where Creedance got his personality and it had been refreshing to see two people that were so vastly different make things work.

“She’s a smart lady,” he finally remarked, laughing as he wiped at his tear soaked face. “Ought to listen to her more often.”

“Yeah, she is, but don’t tell her I said that,” he joked back, relieved for that small moment of broken tension. “I mean it though. I don’t want to spend my life without you, but I’ll understand if you don’t want to try again. What I did...I wouldn’t ever forgive me for it.”

“That’s because you’re an idiot,” he countered as he grabbed for the other’s hands. “It’ll take me some time to trust in this again, but that doesn’t meant I don’t want to try. I want you, Creedance. The good, the bad, and the panicked.”

Ari drifted further into the cabin, quiet despite knowing there was no way he didn’t realize she was already there. With their sense of smelling and hearing, it was nearly impossible to sneak up on one another in a setting like this. 

“Noah? Kiddo, are you home?” she called out, half expecting him not to answer. 

He didn’t, not technically, but he did roll out of bed and move the doorway of the bedroom, looking like he hadn’t slept in a week. 

“Why are you here, auntie?” he asked quietly, knowing the answer already. His aunt had always been pushy, quick to insert herself when she thought anyone needed looking after and he had no doubt she was going to try just that. 

“You haven’t been eating or hunting, so I brought some food to hold you over,” she answered as she closed the distance and fussed over his hair. “I know it hurts right now, pup, but you still need to eat.”

He brushed her off, not in the mood for whatever lecture or talk she felt like having. He had already had more than enough with his parents and grandparents, he didn’t need it from her too. 

“I’m fine, auntie,” he groused, batting her hand away again. He hated when she did that, got overly concerned and fussed.

She sighed and let her hand drop away, but she didn’t believe him. She had seen what happened to their kind when they lost the person they had bonded with the most. Even if they didn’t hold a full mate bond, it was still a loss that could cause medical issue.

“No, you’re not and that’s okay. None of us would be if we were going through what you are,” she argued softly. She had personally fought against her bond with Adam at first, but that sort of thing was impossible to fight off for long.

He shrugged, not seeing the point in debating with her. He wouldn’t win, he knew that, so he focused instead on pulling Cree’s shirt more firmly around him. “I will be fine?”

Of that, Ari had no doubt. No one in the family would let him slip through the cracks and it was part of the reason she was there now. Everyone else was more likely to tiptoe around the issue, wait for him to reach out, but he had the same stubborn streak she and Jax held. He wasn’t going to ask for help, not if he could help it, but that didn’t mean he didn’t need it.

“In time, yeah, but being alone won’t help with that, kiddo. I had someone once, before Adam, that I thought was going to be the one for me. I was heart broken when he left the pack, but he had made his choice and less than two years later, I met Adam and I think you know the rest is history on that.”

He cracked a small smile, having heard the story of how his aunt and uncle had met. It was a fitting one, really, and he couldn’t imagine either one of them with anyone else.

“I know, auntie. Doesn’t make it easier though. Why do you think he left like that?” 

It was something that had been weighing on Noah’s mind since Creedance had left, but he hadn’t had the courage to ask anyone why.

“I can’t answer that, pup, only he could. But it could have something to do with him being more immortal than we are. Maybe he panicked at the idea of outliving you. Or maybe he just missed his home,” she mused, trying to think of any softer answer, anything that didn’t say the boy had merely stopped loving her nephew or had fallen for someone else.

“D’you think so?” 

That little thread of hope was a flickering thing, weak but fighting, and there was no way Ari could let that little light go out, not if it was the only thing keeping him going. 

“Yeah, I really do. Anyone around here could see he cared about you. People do stupid shit when they’re in love and scared. Hell, I tried to push Adam away more times than I could count. I got lucky though, he wasn’t willing to budge.”

Noah sighed and slumped down a bit before pitching forward to lean against her, needing the comfort of family. When her arms wrapped around his shoulders, he buried his face against her shoulder like he used to when he was a little pup, taking comfort in her. She was a lot to deal with, everyone said it, but at the end of the day, she was also the sort of person that most needed when things got rough. 

He definitely needed her now, whether he was willing to admit that to her or not. 

“Do you think he’ll ever come back?”

Her fingers combed through his hair, gentle and soothing while she cuddled him to her. “I don’t know, pup. Maybe. He’d be stupid not to.”

“You really think so?”

He sounded like a lost child, like her own pups when they were scared or upset and it only made Ari hug him a little tighter.

“Yeah, I really do.”

Noah sniffled at that before puling away and rubbing a hand over his face, trying to hide the evidence of tears but he had left the proof on her shirt. “I think...I think I’m a little hungry,” he confessed, the knot in his stomach having loosened enough to remind him that he had not eaten anything in the last two days. “Did you bring anything?”

It was a dumb question, he knew, he had smelled the food the moment she had walk in the door, but he still felt the need to ask, a quiet sort of permission for her to fuss since it seemed to be working.