#nirasawa

It wasn’t until a wiry arm wrapped around his middle that he jolted and his eyes snapped open. Heart racing in his throat, he rasped, “Nirasawa?”

“Mmm,” came the happy reply and a cold nose nuzzled the nape of his neck.

Kabu held in a snarl and tried to calm his anxiety response. He’d grown too lax in the months he’d been sleeping with Nirasawa every night in the same bed. If someone had woken him by surprise even a year ago, they would have met the barrel of his semi-automatic right in the forehead.

Now the fool who crawled into his bed in the middle of the night and wriggled closer to him way more than strictly necessary barely even set off his internal alarms until Kabu was already the little spoon. He was definitely getting soft, he thought, even as something that definitely wasn’t soft poked against his ass.

“Are you awake?” Nirasawa whispered eagerly and Kabu rolled his eyes in the darkness.

“No,” he said flatly.

Nirasawa nuzzled his neck again and kissed the rim of his ear. Then he kissed right below Kabu’s ear as he ran his hand up the center of Kabu’s chest and back down over his tightening abs. “Are you sure?”

Kabu suppressed a noise of pleasure when Nirasawa’s fingers danced along the waistband of his boxers. He finally trapped the wandering fingers in his own and answered, “I have an 8 a.m. meeting with our new source in the PM’s office. I have to be on top of my game.”

“Oh.” Nirasawa slowly withdrew his hand and moved it back to the relative safety of Kabu’s chest. But he was still settled far too close. Kabu could smell the soap Nirasawa used and the fringe of hair that rested against the back of his shoulder was damp.

Where had Nirasawa been? And why had he felt the need to take a shower elsewhere? He didn’t have a gym membership because Kabu had all the equipment they needed right at home. If Nirasawa went out to check on a club or gather the protection money without him, he didn’t usually bother to shower before going to bed, knowing that Kabu would just dirty him up again.

Come to think of it, Nirasawa had been missing the past few Tuesday nights. Kabu had a standing meeting with a handful of his captains to discuss any developments that needed special handling. But Mineishi had been taking him to the meeting for a while now, and Kabu had been too distracted to notice that Nirasawa had missed the past, what? Four? Five weeks?

Kabu was awake now and curious. “Where were you tonight?” he asked brusquely but quietly, in the toughest voice he could manage in the middle of the night in a dark and silent room.

Nirasawa drowsily “hmmm?”ed against him, and Kabu tensed but pushed on with the inquisition.

“Did you have to check up on one of the clubs? Are you running one of the mahjong parlors again? They’re never as efficient as they should be.” Kabu flinched when he felt the hot, humid burst of air on his nape from a big yawn and another little “mmm.”

Kabu took a long minute in the darkness to stew and think on these developments. The bedside clock read 1:12 a.m. when Kabu finally jabbed his elbow back viciously into whatever tender part of the dozing Nirasawa he could reach and asked in his normal voice, “You awake?”

A kittenish “merp” answered him as he pulled away and reached to turn on the bedside lamp. When he looked behind him, Nirasawa was blinking sleepily and looking way too enticing for his own good. In fact, he was practically glowing, all soft and sleepy and smilingly malleable and seemingly open to any of Kabu’s suggestions.

“Kabu-san?” his breathy voice reached out as effectively as his grabby hand.

Kabu batted it away then relented. “Suck me,” he ordered as he moved his pillow against the headboard and settled himself to slouch comfortably. “And then we’ll see what I can do for you.”

“Okay!” Nirasawa seemed newly invigorated and dove under the covers. Kabu settled himself back as Nirasawa’s eager mouth took over. Kabu ran his hand through Nirasawa’s hair—definitely recently shampooed and still damp in the longer sections—but then let the sensations of his calloused, scarred hands and hot, tight mouth drive all the other thoughts from his mind.

It was only in the morning while Kabu sipped his coffee and stood over the sleeping Nirasawa—drooling a little into his pillow— realizing that he could just let Nirasawa sleep in as reward for an extremely dedicated job that it hit him.

One: Nirasawa hadn’t answered him when he’d asked where he was.

And two: that glow that Nirasawa sported was actually a smattering of glitter that still stuck to his cheeks and forehead and dusted his dark hair.

Kabu grabbed the covers and ripped them off the bed. When Nirasawa flailed and rolled out onto the floor in shock, Kabu told him, “Get your ass up. You’re on duty today,” and absolutely didn’t feel bad at all when the big eyes blinked up in adorable confusion.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Kabu felt those eyes following him even more than usual that day. He ignored it even more studiously than he normally did, but his traitorous mind worked overtime while he sat at his desk and pretended to read the reports Nirasawa had placed there, along with a cup of his favorite coffee and a pastry Kabu typically declined even knowing about but secretly enjoyed on cheat days.

Was Nirasawa doing business for someone else? Was he spying for another outfit? Was he selling secrets?

Was he working at taking over the business for himself?

Kabu’s heart clenched as his hand squeezed shut and scattered powdered sugar all over the unseen papers when the worst thought came unbidden. Was Nirasawa having an affair?

Kabu forced himself to calm and peel his fingers off the poor, ruined pastry. To be fair, they’d never actually had any kind of talk about their relationship. They weren’t two teenagers finally starting to date and needing to make it formal and exclusive.

Kabu squirmed a little at the thought. He’d simply promised Nirasawa that, if everything worked out in the outfit’s favor and they both actually survived, Nirasawa would be his.

And he knew that Nirasawa was. Nirasawa had never actually promised to be faithful, but Kabu hadn’t given it another thought. It was the same for him: Nirasawa was more than enough lover for him. He had all the traits Kabu could have ever wanted in a partner and then some. And Kabu had...feelings for Nirasawa, even if he didn’t often admit it out loud.

Besides, he’d never seen Nirasawa look at a woman—ever. Hell, the only time Nirasawa ever looked at other men was when appraising the danger level to Kabu. He’d never shown the least amount of sexual interest in anyone else.

Sometimes Kabu wondered if he’d really fucked up Nirasawa’s head right from the time they’d met and if it was right that Nirasawa was fixated so totally on Kabu. A true Kabu-sexual.

Kabu gave himself an imperceptible shake and accepted the napkin that Nirasawa materialized before him.

“No more shitty sweets in here from now on. Now get back to work,” he barked.

Even Nirsawa’s murmured, “Yes, Kabu-san,” grated suddenly on his nerves.

But Kabu couldn’t let it go. His suspicions started to consume him. He watched Nirasawa with narrowed eyes and a glare. During the next few days, his men began to start at any sudden movement and share knowing looks when Kabu growled an order at Nirasawa.

After one particularly gruff exchange that ended with him sending Nirasawa across the city for no particular reason, he heard one of the men mutter, “Looks like he’s sleeping on the couch again tonight.” And Kabu realized the whole situation looked like a lovers’ spat. That didn’t make his mood any better.

He slammed the car door shut and fumed in silence as Mineishi drove him home. Then he realized—Mineishi was driving him more than usual when Nirasawa didn’t take his place behind the wheel.

“Mineishi, where does Nirasawa go on Tuesday nights?”

“What?”

“Where. Does. Nirasawa. Go. On. Tuesday. Nights.” He enunciated sarcastically and watched Mineishi in the rearview mirror. He clearly saw him swallow hard as sweat broke out on his face.

“Oh, Nirasawa? On Tuesdays?”

“You’re stalling,” Kabu told him. “You’re trying to think up a plausible lie. Do you know?”

“Um, know what? What about Nirasawa?”

Kabu grabbed the back of the driver’s seat and leaned up right against Mineishi’s ear when they stopped at a red light. “You do know. And you won’t tell your boss?”

Mineishi’s eyes flicked from the mirror to the road and back again. Kabu shook the seat until Mineishi’s head wobbled. “I don’t know!” he yelped.

“You do!”

“He swore me to secrecy!” Mineishi hissed and Kabu saw more cold sweat drip down his face.

“Tell me what that little shit is up to. Right now!”

“I can’t!” Mineishi all but wailed. “He said he’d kill me!”

“I can kill you, you know,” Kabu growled right into Mineishi’s ear and watched in satisfaction as he paled.

“Yes, but you’ll make it quick. Nirasawa will torture me first.”

Kabu grunted and leaned back. Mineishi gulped audibly and slowly drove on through the intersection, his hands shaking on the wheel.

Kabu went through so many cigarettes that week. He watched Nirasawa like a hawk. But other than him tilting his head like a confused puppy and giving him betrayed looks when Kabu snapped, Nirasawa acted completely like normal. He didn’t leave Kabu’s side unless Kabu shoved him away, he was completely attentive at work, and his sex drive was just as high as usual.

Kabu gave a brief thought to freezing him out from sex, but what the hell. If they were going to have a blowout, they might as well blow as much as possible. So Kabu really put his back into it, so to speak, and made sure that Nirasawa would never forget him when—if Nirasawa ever walked out and left him.

His not-so-covert observation of Nirasawa noticed him doing a few odd things occasionally. Nirasawa wore earbuds more often, and Kabu caught him smiling a little at his phone more than once. During one meeting, Nirasawa’s phone buzzed with text alerts so often that Kabu had to stare him down for a good thirty seconds before he hurried to mute it.

Kabu’s fist clenched. There was definitely something going on, and he would be damned if he didn’t figure it out. He decided to lay his trap on Tuesday.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Kabu deftly knotted his tie and watched in the mirror as Nirasawa fussed with papers on the desk behind him.

“I have to leave for the meeting early. We moved it up half an hour,” Kabu lied. When Nirasawa just nodded, he went on. “Come with me tonight. We can go out for a drink after.”

“Oh,” Nirasawa stopped rustling the papers but didn’t look up. “No, I can’t. I have to visit the parlor.”

Kabu crossed the room silently and draped himself over Nirasawa in the desk chair. Nirasawa froze when Kabu massaged his shoulders and whispered wetly in his ear, “Then let’s both blow off work all together and stay in.” Kabu ran one hand down Nirasawa’s chest and over his abs, feeling them tighten automatically. He dropped his other hand straight to Nirasawa’s cock and squeezed while licking his ear.

“I-I-I-I can’t!” Nirasawa twitched and stood up so quickly the chair would have fallen if Kabu hadn’t been leaning into it. Nirasawa half-turned in the narrow space and wrapped his arms around himself defensively, his face screwed up in some strong emotion.

Kabu ran his fingers over Nirasawa’s cheek and cupped his chin. “Come on, let’s play hooky. What’s the point of sleeping with the boss if you can’t take advantage of it every once in a while.”

“Nooo,” Nirasawa all but moaned when Kabu slid his thumb over Nirasawa’s trembling bottom lip. Kabu noticed that his tongue did dart out to lick just the tip before Nirasawa’s mouth clamped shut.

“Yeees,” Kabu teased. “The parlor isn’t that important.”

Nirasawa shook his head so hard, Kabu’s hand was almost dislodged. “Kabu-san, you can’t mean that. We can’t let our business slide. Once we let one thing go, you know how the rest just falls away and then nobody takes us seriously.”

Nirasawa didn’t seem to realize he was babbling, but Kabu noticed it right away. He thought it would have been pretty fucking cute if it hadn’t meant he was lying out his ass.

“Fine,” Kabu said, pushing him away as Kabu took a step back. “Go then.”

Nirasawa turned to him, lips parted, starting to say something, but Kabu just walked away, grabbed his jacket and stalked out. He gestured to Mineishi who was waiting in the hall and didn’t look back.

When they got to the car, Kabu ordered Mineishi to pull around the block and park where Kabu could covertly watch the front door of the house.

Mineishi obeyed but said, “Uh, boss, what are we—”

“Shut the fuck up.” Kabu lit a cigarette with trembling hands and waited.

He was hurt but not surprised when Nirasawa walked out of the house minutes later carrying a full backpack and looking around furtively. Kabu swore under his breath, and he heard Mineishi gulp. Nirasawa went to his bike, revved the engine and took off.

“Follow him,” Kabu ordered curtly.

“But boss—”

“Do it.”

Mineishi tried, Kabu had to admit, but Nirasawa was on a fast, agile bike, and he wasn’t afraid to take advantage of it. They lost him somewhere in the city, traffic backed to a standstill for all but the foolhardy who would dare take a motorcycle around and through the lines of cars.

Kabu hit the back of the driver’s seat and swore loudly. Mineishi bounced forward and met his eyes in the rear view mirror.

“Take me home,” Kabu said, his voice gruffer than usual.

“Uh, boss, I think—”

“I don’t pay you to fucking think,” Kabu snapped then met Mineishi’s eyes again and sighed at the hangdog expression in the mirror. Kabu rubbed his face and softened his voice. “Sorry. You know I don’t think that of you, Mineishi.”

“I know. And you should know that Nirasawa is… well, you have to know that he looo...er, you’re the only...” Mineishi’s voice trailed off as Kabu saw the embarrassed red rise up his neck and over his face.

“Are you trying to tell me that Nirasawa isn’t cheating on me?”

“Yes,” Mineishi said gratefully, “that’s exactly what I’m trying to say.”

“It wouldn’t matter if he were,” Kabu lied, staring out the window. “Now, take me home. I’m tired.”

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Kabu was waiting when Nirasawa crept in well after midnight, trying and failing at being silent. Kabu snapped on the living room light and watched Nirasawa flail.

“How was business tonight?” Kabu asked.

“Oh, you know,” Nirasawa waved a hand vaguely, and Kabu realized again that the kid just wasn’t a good liar.

“No, I don’t know. And neither do you. Because you weren’t there.”

“Whaaaat?” Nirasawa started to argue, but Kabu saw him realize the game was up. Instead of continuing the lie, Nirasawa went right to pleading. “You’re right, I wasn’t at the parlor. I’m sorry.”

“Where were you?”

“I was— I can’t —please, just give me one more week. Next Tuesday is six, and I need to—just please, give me one more? And then Wednesday I’ll have something for you. A surprise. You like surprises, right?”

“I hate surprises,” Kabu said flatly. “You know that.”

“Please, Kabu-san, I swear, I’m doing this for you. Please trust me.”

“I don’t really have a choice, do I? I could kick your ass to the curb but until you come clean and tell me the truth about what’s going on, I guess I’ll keep a watch on you. All the men will be watching you.”

“It’s not like that,” Nirasawa reached out for him, but Kabu stood up and walked toward the bedroom door.

“And you’re sleeping on the couch. Liars don’t sleep in the bed,” Kabu told him as he shut the door in Nirasawa’s face. With a final click, he locked the door.

Stupid Nirasawa, making him feel things and turning out just to be another liar. Fuck him.

Kabu didn’t need him. He didn’t need any of his shit.

So, he spent the next week acting like Nirasawa simply wasn’t there. Kabu knew it was childish. He knew that the other men knew something was wrong. They were tiptoeing around them both like they were bombs ready to explode. Like lovesick teenagers who were only speaking through their friends, although Kabu wasn’t even doing that.

He did order several of the men to go through the books and reports that Nirasawa had been working on, looking for anything out of the ordinary, any kind of clue as to what was going on. But they came to him privately and reassured him that everything Nirasawa was involved in checked out, and he was doing an even better job than his predecessor.

Kabu was oddly relieved that Nirasawa’s secret wasn’t about work, but the ache in his chest got even worse when he realized it had to be personal then.

All Kabu could do was wait until Tuesday, while Nirasawa planned whatever “surprise” he had in mind for Wednesday.

Kabu sat in the dining room staring blindly at a newspaper and eating takeaway that Mineishi had fetched when Nirasawa stood before him with his backpack full.

“I’m going now,” Nirasawa said quietly. “I’ll be back around midnight.”

Kabu ignored him.

“If you’ll come home tomorrow night at six, I’ll have everything ready,” Nirasawa told him.

Kabu turned a page of his newspaper.

Nirasawa bowed low at the waist. “I love you, Kabu-san, and I’m sorry things happened this way. I only hope I can make it up to you.”

Kabu didn’t make a sound. But he heard Nirasawa leave and when the door clicked shut behind him, Kabu threw his coffee cup across the room to shatter against the wall. Then he called Mineishi and ordered, “Get me a room tonight, I don’t care where. I want to leave here in 15 minutes.”

Kabu was seriously tempted to take a sudden trip to … somewhere. Anywhere. Some place exotic, with really hot people hanging out on beaches in very little clothing. Somewhere he could fuck random strangers he’d never have to see again and never give another thought to. Certainly no one who would move into his life like a wrecking ball and overwhelm all his other thoughts and desires.

Fucking Nirasawa. It always came back to fucking Nirasawa.

Kabu stared at the ceiling most of the night, trying and failing not to think about Nirasawa and how they’d come to this. Sure, he didn’t usually tell him—didn’t actually spell out—his feelings, but that didn’t mean he didn’t feel them. Hell, the first time he’d actually said the words “I love you,” Nirasawa had freaked the fuck out and been in tears, not because he was moved by the heady sentiment. No, he’d actually thought Kabu was strung out on drugs, for fuck’s sake. As if Kabu would be so stupid.

No, the best thing he could do was cut his losses. Accept that the thing with Nirasawa—whatever it was—was over. Get him out of his house. Transfer him in the organization. Move on. Take on a new lover, a woman this time, who would be pliant and smiling, and when he got tired of her like he always did, there were plenty more out there to take to bed.

None of them were anything like Nirasawa, but that was the idea, wasn’t it?

Kabu rolled over and punched the hotel pillow viciously. He just had to get the idiot out of his mind.

It was easier said than done.

~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~

He ignored Nirasawa’s frantic texts the next morning, and unhurriedly got ready for work with great and deliberate care. When Nirasawa all but ran into the office, Kabu shot him a death glare that made him wisely shut up. Kabu managed to successfully avoid being alone with him all morning, but he was immediately aware when Nirasawa left early.

At 5:30 p.m., Mineishi approached his desk and cleared his throat when Kabu refused to turn his attention away from the stack of papers he’d stared fruitlessly at most of the afternoon. “It’s time to go, boss,” Mineishi finally spoke up.

“I’m not done,” Kabu said, turning the same page he’d flipped over a few minutes before.

Mineishi shuffled his feet but bravely stood firm. “You have an appointment at six.”

“I don’t remember scheduling any appointment.”

“Nirasawa did. You’re meeting him at six at your house.”

“No, I’m not,” Kabu informed him.

“Yes, you are.” Mineishi didn’t even flinch when Kabu finally looked up, and he saw that the rest of the crew was looking on nervously. He raised an eyebrow at their defiance.

“And if I refuse to go?”

Mineishi only opened and closed his mouth once before he was able to speak. “We’re to make sure you get there. One way or another.”

Kabu rose slowly to his full height. Mineishi took a step back unconsciously. “Then let’s go. I’d hate for you boys to have to get your hands dirty.”

They all looked inordinately thankful and Kabu almost rolled his eyes. “But don’t think I’m going to forget this,” he hissed and they all looked like their sphincters tightened immediately.

He followed Mineishi to the car, and they drove in silence. Mineishi kept looking back at him in the rearview mirror which only pissed off Kabu more until Mineishi finally cleared his throat and spoke. “It’s gonna be okay, boss, I swear, really. Please don’t be angry.”

“Who said I was angry?” Kabu said calmly.

“Oh fuck,” he distinctly heard Mineishi mutter and he didn’t say anything else.

Kabu didn’t say anything either as he got out of the car, adjusted his jacket, flicked his cuffs and ignored Mineishi’s tiny call of “Good luck.” He strode into the house like he owned it, which, well he did, and very intentionally did not slam the front door.

Nirasawa heard him anyway. “Kabu-san, please, if you would be so good as to come into the bedroom?”

Kabu sighed and rubbed the spot between his eyes that had ached for two weeks. Did Nirasawa really think he was going to just seduce him and make it all better? Damn it, sex was not the answer to all problems, and Kabu was going to give him a piece of his mind. He was going to make him pay for enticing Kabu to trust him and grow to be so dependent on him, right before Nirasawa snatched it all away.

Kabu was going to tell him to get out, right the fuck now, but when he got to the bedroom door, all his words flew right out of his head.

There was a pole in his bedroom. A pole that was somehow attached to ceiling and floor. A pole that looked just like the ones Kabu had seen inside some of the Western-style strip clubs he’d visited. It was the focus of several lamps that Nirasawa had set up to shine directly on its entire height.

Beside it stood Nirasawa, dressed in a loose button-down shirt and shiny pleather pants, his bare toes curled into the carpet.

“Please, have a seat, Kabu-san,” Nirasawa gestured to the plush chair he’d moved from the living room and set up in the darkest corner of the bedroom, farthest from the pole.

“Nirasawa, what the f—” but Kabu’s rough voice was cut off by Nirasawa putting a finger to his own lips.

“Please, Kabu-san. I want to show you what I’ve been doing all this time. I’m finally ready to share it with you. Please?”

Still stunned to silence, Kabu obeyed and took the chair. Nirasawa smiled at him beatifically then turned and readied something with his phone.

When the music began, he began to move. Kabu watched, entranced, as Nirasawa rolled his body to the rhythm of the song, something with long, low, pounding beats. He didn’t shimmy or shake or shuffle, but Nirasawa’s body undulated, rolled smoothly in sync with the beat.

As the song began its first chorus, Nirasawa turned to face Kabu fully and in one thumping pound, ripped his shirt open, letting it drop off his shoulders and down his arms to puddle on the floor. As he continued the dance, Kabu greedily admired his upper body. Nirasawa’s muscles looked even more defined than usual, infinitely better than when he’d been dangerously underweight while away from Kabu.

Now, his muscles gleamed, still lithe but rock hard. Kabu wondered if he would cut his tongue if he licked up Nirasawa’s abs.

After he dropped the shirt, Nirasawa strode confidently to the pole and lifted himself somehow, spinning as he went up until he brushed the ceiling. He held onto the pole with one arm before suddenly spinning around so his upper body tensed then, making it all look effortless, he spun into an upside down split. He was holding the pole with what looked like one shoulder and his lower body was spread wide.

Kabu was instantly hard. Could Nirasawa always spread his legs that far? How the hell had he learned how to do that?

Nirasawa was concentrating in the position then, on the beat, somehow let go and twisted so he was right side up but his legs again were spread into a split which he levered up and into a headstand with his legs split then around the pole.

Kabu had to adjust his erection as he leaned forward, all his attention on Nirasawa’s lithe body bending and twisting in ways he’d never imagined.

Nirasawa looked like he was in ecstasy as he held his body weight on the pole, doing a series of kicks and scissors with his legs before another split led to him sliding down the pole. But he only broke contact for a moment before shimmying along with the music into another leg lift and embracing the pole again, this time spinning with his long legs out then almost riding the pole in a close grip.

When he threw his head back, his eyes closed in concentration but his mouth opened in a pant. Kabu was sure he was panting too.

Nirasawa slid down to the floor again, this time letting go altogether to do a series of moves that involved a whole lot of touching himself, stroking his hands over his chest. And when they came down to meet at his groin, he opened his eyes and stared directly into Kabu’s.

Kabu almost came on the spot. He was well past the point of trying to look cool or disinterested, and Nirasawa almost stumbled, looking surprised at seeing Kabu so affected. Then his cheeks burned even redder and Kabu thought his hips developed a little more sway as he reached for the pole again and held on, humping his hips toward it, shooting a look at Kabu over his shoulder.

It was all Kabu could do not to reach out to him.

Instead, after a final hump and slide, Nirasawa reached for his waistband, and Kabu did lick his lips then. He somehow tore off the pants, leaving him only in tight, black pleather boxer-briefs.

Then he reached for the pole again and spun, supporting all his weight with his arms, his legs open wide as he twirled, the muscles starkly defined throughout his body.

Kabu didn’t know how he could swing all the way around in that position. But when Nirasawa clutched the pole behind his back with hooked arms and spun around so he could see Kabu, Kabu swore out loud. Nirasawa smiled, looking smugger and cockier than Kabu had ever seen him.

This time when he slid down off the pole, he continued to his knees on the carpet, still locked on Kabu’s gaze. And he didn’t stop. His body was still moving perfectly in time with the low beat of the music, the smoky voice of the singer, as he crawled toward Kabu.

But he stopped, just out of reach, when the song ended.

The room was silent except for Nirasawa’s soft panting, but Kabu was sure he must hear the loud pounding of Kabu’s own heart.

Nirasawa didn’t say anything, just remained on his knees at Kabu’s feet.

Kabu didn’t know what to say, but he’d never let that stop him before.

“What the fuck was that?”

“Did you like it?”

“Of course I did.”

Nirasawa beamed up at him. “I’m sorry it took me so long to learn. I know you told me to take lessons.”

“I what?” Kabu’s brain remained offline but he was positive he’d never have a reason to tell Nirasawa to take pole dancing lessons.

“You told me once to strip, but I didn’t know how,” Nirasawa said. “That day you took me shopping? Then you told me I should get lessons at stripping or maybe pole dancing because that would be sexy.” Nirasawa paused at the expression on Kabu’s face before finishing quietly, “You said so.”

“Nirasawa, I barely remember even joking about that. For fuck’s sake, I didn’t mean take it literally.”

“So you didn’t like it?” Nirasawa’s quiet voice quaked and he stared down at the carpet.

“No. I loved it,” Kabu reached for him then, sliding off the chair to his knees so he could cup Nirasawa’s face and lift it to stare into his eyes. “You are amazing. I just mean, you didn’t have to go to all that trouble for me.”

“It wasn’t that much trouble,” Nirasawa whispered as Kabu brought his lips to his.

It was the softest kiss they’d ever shared, Kabu thought much later. It felt like forever since they’d touched and in only that short time, Kabu had managed to forget just how perfectly Nirasawa’s lips felt against his. Kabu captured his top lip first then gently moved to his plumper bottom lip.

He could feel Nirasawa shaking so he pulled away in concern. But Nirasawa only leaned forward so his entire upper body was held up by Kabu and tucked his face into the crook of Kabu’s neck. Kabu couldn’t feel any tears, so he just wrapped his arms tighter around Nirasawa and held him, his mind racing for something intelligible to say that might comfort him.

“So, how did you learn all of this? That’s where you’ve been disappearing to. It must have been hard work,” he finally said.

“It was hard but fun,” Nirasawa’s muffled voice replied. “You told me to take dance lessons, but it took me a long time to find a class. Pole dancing is for exercise and an amazing core workout, but there were no classes for stripping lessons or lap dances.”

Kabu mouthed those last words to himself before he found his grip around Nirasawa tightening even more. The hold must have become more uncomfortable, or Nirasawa couldn’t properly breathe, because he carefully disentangled himself and pushed back onto his own knees. But Kabu didn’t let go completely, only loosening the hug until his hands rested around Nirasawa’s waist.

“When I finally found the pole class, they didn’t want to take me at first because, well, it was a risk, I guess. But once they realized I wasn’t there to ogle the girls or harass anybody, and that I really wanted to learn for my boy—” Nirasawa cut himself off, his flushed cheeks turning even pinker.

‘For fuck’s sake,’ Kabu thought fondly, reaching up to touch the warmth of his embarrassment. Nirasawa would literally murder for him; he had no right to be so fucking adorable and shy about almost saying “boyfriend.”

“They helped me work out this special routine after class, once I promised them I would only show it to you. I stayed late after every class to make it perfect. It’s better when the ceiling is higher so I don’t hit it,” he said.

Shit, how could Nirasawa still blush at all and keep his eyes down like a timid maiden after everything they’d done together, especially after this. The amount of work and planning that had gone into it. After all his hard effort, Kabu knew he had to properly show his appreciation.

“You’re incredible,” Kabu told him and had just a glimpse of Nirasawa’s face lighting up from the compliment before he kissed him.

This kiss didn’t even try to remain innocent or soft. Nirasawa’s mouth opened immediately under his tongue and answered him eagerly. Kabu spent a moment getting to know that agile tongue again then reveled in the feeling after a week apart. Nirasawa’s little breathy moans just from the kiss turned him on more than they ever had.

Nirasawa’s roaming hands were stroking from Kabu’s shoulders down to his waist but when they strayed to pull his shirt loose from his pants, Kabu broke the kiss. “Let’s take this to bed,” he murmured against Nirasawa’s lips already tempting him into one more kiss.

Kabu finally pulled back completely with a reluctant groan that turned into a grunt when he got to his feet, knees creaking under the strain. His look down almost undid him when Nirasawa’s face tipped up to him, eyes glazed from passion, lips still parted and glistening from his kiss.

Kabu held down his hand. “You’re definitely more bendy than I am, but I’ll help you up this once.” Then he internally winced when Nirasawa sprang right to his feet with no more pressure on Kabu’s hand than a caress. “And maybe you can show me how flexible you are in bed.”