#newmutants55

In addition to writing Uncanny X-Men comic alongside a countless number of mini-series, spin offs, team-ups, annuals, and special editions, the first 54 issues of the New Mutants were written by X-Men lead writer Chris Claremont. This made the stories about the X-Men junior team essential, because not only did the writing style of New Mutants match that of Uncanny X-Men, but the stories of the two comics were often so intertwined that both were required reading in order to understand what was going on. In fact, I had never planned on reading any of the New Mutants for this blog, but there were so many references to the series in Uncanny that I had no choice. And to be honest, it was like a surprise Christmas present (like a puppy wiener dog with a bow on it) when I realized there was a whole other X-Men series written alongside Uncanny X-Men that matched, and sometimes surpassed, the quality of the original series. In issue #55, writing duties for the New Mutants were handed off to Louise Simonson, presumably so Claremont could continue to expand the X-Men brand with new series like Excalibur. I don’t like Simonson’s scripting nearly as much as I do Claremont’s. She’s written a good portion of the Power Pack and X-Factor comics that I’ve read, and while I really like her light hearted Power Pack stories, her 1960s style of comic book writing doesn’t suit the darkly themed stories of the adult X-Men nearly as well. However, the last few issues of X-Factor were pretty incredible, where the original X-Men fought Apocalypse and Archangel, so maybe her work here will grow on me in a similar manner. These first few pages here, where Sam has a diva meltdown about not having a good shirt to wear to Lila Cheney’s album launch party, aren’t lighting a fire under my ass. (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

Man, I know how that feels. I can’t even count how many times I’ve gotten that “oh well” look from a date the first time they see me. Maybe if I stopped wearing this jewel encrusted leather vest everywhere I went. (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

So there’s a race of alien bird people at Lila’s album launch party who need Lila’s help to save their species by stealing some alien artifact for them but she doesn’t want to leave Earth so they try to kill her boyfriend Sam by getting him high on X and then dropping him in the bay. And then, after the New Mutants defeat them, Magik is all like, “Let’s fucking kill them!!!” and everyone else is all like “Geez girl calm down just send them to hell for all eternity” and Illyana is all like “arrrrrgh FINE.” This comic was camp and super dark at the same time. Not bad for a first issue, Simonson!! (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

Seriously, don’t you kids ever do any school work? It’s just party party party at the Xavier mansion, and Magneto doesn’t even care! You should be alone in a den someplace with your nose buried in a book, STUDYING, like I did when I was in college. There will be plenty of time for drinking yourself into early onset Alzheimer’s disease after you graduate and ruin your life with a series of bad decisions and low expectations for yourself! (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

Aw geez who is this guy. Did Banshee and the Vulture have a kid? And look at that bedazzled vest that Cannonball has on. I hope this comic is more interesting than the cover. (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

Me trying to dance. Or, ya know, going to the grocery store. Or trying to walk through my own god damned house without killing myself. I live alone too. I’m going to motherfucking die one of these days and my mom is going to find me a month later face down in a plate of pudding cups at the bottom of my basement stairs. Seriously guys, if the posts ever mysteriously stop coming, call the police. (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

”Hey ya know Pac-Man?” If there’s one cute thing going on in this comic book, its Doug and Rahne’s flirting. Especially this part here where he tells her to stop stuffing her goddamn face. I’m actually surprised that Doug has emotionally bounced back so well, considering the last party he went to he was a dick to everyone he talked to and then he got drunk and assaulted a woman. Talk about having the modus operandi of a god damned sociopath. (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)

Seriously these kids. I know it’s been a while since I read it, but the New Mutants were JUST AT a party in the last two issues. Just wear the same clothes you wore to the Hellfire Club gala!! (New Mutants #55 – Sept 1987)