#neveeerrrr

He’s drunk. You know he is because that’s how it always is. And you’d be remise to think that he actually means any of what he says to you when you’re the only one who runs to him— when you’re the only one who ever picks up the phone.

“I love you,” he says, giddy with the vodka shifting through his veins, and it makes your heart stutter for a moment because maybe he means it. And then he throws up over your shoes and you know that he doesn’t. That he never could. It hurts more than it should, and it shouldn’t hurt at all.

But you help him anyway, because that’s who you are. Kind hearted and soft, your friends say, but you know that you’re more of a pushover than anything else— especially when it comes to Sanada.

You start to question yourself— are you not good enough for him? Is there someone else, someone that he loves more? Does he not remember a thing he says to you when you pick up his pieces? And if he does, does it not mean anything to him?

You tuck him into bed and switch the light off, about to close the door to his room when you hear it. The soft whisper of his voice, the sound of it drawing you back into the room, back to him.

“Seiya?” you let yourself ask, “are you okay?”

“Stay.”

There’s that stutter in your heart again. Staring at his figure in the bed, you consider for a long moment your next move— but your mind was made up the moment he asked. You’ll never say no to him.

He falls asleep curled around your body. Through the alcoholic smell is his own scent, soft and intoxicating. Then, your eyes start to well with tears… even though this is everything you’ve ever wanted, even though Seiya Sanada is the only man you’ll ever want, this almost breaks your heart. “Tell me how to make you love me sober,” you whisper to his chest, the skin already damp with your tears, “tell me what I’m doing wrong.”

You’re not surprised in the morning that when you wake, he’s not there. He never has been.

“Seiya,” you sigh, head falling back to the pillow. Your vision blurs once more.

Then a hand is in yours, strength you don’t possess pulling you up into a hug that almost causes a brain aneurysm— because what? Your eyes are open wide and staring at the ceiling, but Sanada’s arms have curled around your waist and hold you tightly to him.

You’re dumbfounded, completely and entirely caught off guard. “Seiya?”

“I remember,” Sanada whispers into your hair. “I remember everything I say and do, even drunk. I thought— I thought you didn’t realise how I felt, or that you didn’t feel anything for me… but I heard what you said…”

This isn’t Seiya— it can’t be, because Sanada is rough, hard to know and even harder to keep, and you’ve never been in his league… at least, you never thought you could be.

“I’m sorry, Y/N… will you forgive me?”