#naruto logic

Naruto: "Never go back on your word! That’s my ninja way!" Yashiro: "Yeah? Well, your ninja way also means you spent years chasing after a dude who literally tried to kill you multiple times." Naruto: "Because Sasuke is my friend!" Yashiro: "Bro, he impaled you with a lightning spear. TWICE."

Naruto: "But he was just lost in darkness!" Yashiro: "So? If a guy keeps blocking you after 200 texts, maybe take the hint Ramen runt"

Sakura: "I love Sasuke!" Yashiro: "He insulted you, ignored you, tried to kill you, and left you unconscious on a bench. Your self-respect has been missing since episode one."

Sakura: "But he was suffering!" Yashiro: "So was Naruto, but you punched him every time he breathed near you."

Naruto: "You don’t get it! Bonds are important!" Yashiro: "Bonds? My guy, he literally stabbed Karin and said 'don’t move.'"

Mitsuki: I'm the son of the man who killed the third Hokage and almost destroyed Konoha.

Fights with naruto

Then naruto uses talk no jutsu (strongest genjutsu) Aizen shows us sad flashbacks

Then talks about loneliness

Then naruto uses kage bunshin no jutsu and defeats him with rasengan

First of, we have Jiraiya, a bit of a perv but generaly ok, is a good techer and great with kids, shows interest in relationships and I think someone wanted to marry him.

Tsunade, perfectly normal had a love interest and most likely wated to get married and have a family

But nope! Why give these people a family when you have borderline sociopathic snake man? He experiments on people, he murders for the fuck of it, he uses people for his own profit, he enjoys seeing people in pain, doesn't care that his best friend is dead and even now, he still murders people to remain imortal. Yep! Of course he is the one to have a family.

To be fair though, he is extemily good at raising kids

Hashirama: Nope I'm gonna split them and give them to the other nations to establish a balance where everyone has a weapon of mass destruction. Just in case giving two at once to Iwa and Kiri.

Tobirama: Brother, are you fucking serious?