#my muse...

Sunstreaker never in a million vorns would have guessed his life would end like this.

He always thought he would go out in a blaze of glory, protecting Bluestreak or Sideswipe. Or doing jet judo one last time and finally going down with the seeker he was riding. Pit, there was a time where he thought his opponent in the gladiatorial pits of Kaon would get the job done and extinguish his spark.

But no.

Primus would never let him off that easily. Of course not.

He’d go out in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by Decepticons, with no way to contact his team or his brother, protecting a stupid organic of all things. 

He thought he was better than this. He didn’t want to die protecting an organic. Especially not one that had stupidly driven into their battle, gotten themselves hurt, gotten Sunstreaker hurt, and worst of all, annoying him more than Sideswipe ever could. 

But…Optimus always did preach about protecting the local species and Sunstreaker would be damned if he let this organic die and had to deal with Optimus’ ‘I’m disappointed in you’ voice and talk. Those never ended well. For anyone. Ever. Disappointed Optimus was like kicking a turbopuppy while it was down and even Sunstreaker wasn’t immune to that. 

After a particularly bad prank that Sideswipe had pulled, Optimus had pulled Sideswipe into his office and talked to him for over twenty breems, and when they were done, Sideswipe brushed passed Sunstreaker who was waiting for him and went straight to their room. Through their bond Sunstreaker could feel nothing but regret and distress from his twin. Sunstreaker knew, he knew that Sideswipe went a little too far with his prank this time, but it was taking everything in his power to not march into Optimus’ office and demand to know what he said to Sideswipe to make him feel that way. 

Instead of impulsively doing that and earning himself a night in the brig, Sunstreaker chased after Sideswipe into their room. By the time Sunstreaker had gotten there, Sideswipe had already curled himself as tightly as he could into the corner of his berth facing towards the wall.

Sunstreaker wasn’t good at this. This was more of Sideswipe’s domain, the comfort. But for his twin, he’d do anything. Even if that meant giving the best terrible advice and comfort that he could. Sideswipe would know that Sunstreaker tried and that would be all that mattered to him.

“Sideswipe?” Sunstreaker tried asking. Sideswipe didn’t even twitch in acknowledgment. 

Okay, rude. Whatever. Sunstreaker could deal with a grumpy Sideswipe. 

“Sideswipe? C’mon bro. Talk to me.” Still nothing. Sunstreaker resisted the urge to roll his optics and hit Sideswipe. As much as he loved hitting his brother, that’s not what he needed right now. He moved to stand beside Sideswipe’s berth.

Later though, of course. Sunstreaker would hit him real good. 

~Talk to me, Sides. I’m not going to leave you alone unless you do~ Sunstreaker said over their bond. Sideswipe could ignore Sunstreaker all he wanted, but he couldn’t ignore the bond. 

~Go away~ Came Sideswipes curt response. 

Sunstreaker sat down on the berth, slowly pushing his field towards Sideswipe’s to try and get a read on it. Normally, Sunstreaker wouldn’t have the need to use his field, their bond so open and strong that he could feel whatever Sideswipe was feeling even when Sunstreaker tried to close it. But now? Sideswipe’s part of the bond was locked tight and Sunstreaker could barely feel him. He hated it. 

~You know I can’t do that. What did Prime say? No way he’s upset you this bad~

~He didn’t. This is something completely totally unrelated. And that would be if I was upset. Which I’m not~

~Sure you aren’t. You just happened to shut the bond and get all mopey after a talk with Prime right?~

~Exactly. See you understand. Don’t know why you’re asking~

Oh for the love of Primus-

~I can go beat up Prime if that would make you feel better~ Sunstreaker offered, trying to lighten the mood. If he couldn’t do it with words, then violence was the next best choice. 

A small chuckle escaped from Sideswipe. 

Score. 

But then he sighed and curled up tighter and turned away from Sunstreaker even more. 

~Sides….c’mon. You can’t stay like this forever~

~I can and I will~ Sideswipe grumped.

~If you wanna be this way, fine. Don’t say I didn’t try to help~

Sunstreaker stood up and moved off the bed. He walked across the room and stopped out the door. He opened it and pretended to walk out. He silently side-stepped the door as it stayed open for a few kliks then slid shut. 

Sideswipe ever so slightly tilted his helm up to see if Sunstreaker had really left. 

Got him.

The minute Sideswipe’s optics met his twin's own, Sunstreaker sprinted towards Sideswipe and tackled him off the berth.

“Wh-what the frag are you doing? Get off me!” Sideswipe demanded as Sunstreaker wrestled him, forcing his frame into a compromised position. 

“No.” Sunstreaker said calmly as he narrowly dodged an elbow strut to the nasal ridge. Sideswipe cried out in shock as Sunstreaker flipped him over and locked his legs around Sideswipe’s shoulders. Sunstreaker grabbed Sideswipe’s shoulders as he twisted himself behind his brother and rolled forward. 

“Dude, stop!” Sideswipe was struggling in Sunstreaker’s hold. In battles and fights they were evenly matched, one not stronger than the other, but Sunstreaker had gotten the jump on him. He had the upper servo and Sideswipe completely at his mercy.

Sunstreaker slammed Sideswipe into the ground onto his front and promptly sat Sideswipe with his servos underneath Sunstreaker’s aft so he couldn’t try to move Sunstreaker off.

“Get off me you big fragging oaf! You’re gonna crush me!” Sideswipe tried turning his frame to get to Sunstreaker but it was useless. Sunstreaker had him pinned. 

“Tell me what Prime said.”

“No!” 

“Fine” Sunstreaker loosened his frame and put more pressure onto Sideswipe. He let out an ‘oof’ as Sunstreaker leaned more and more on him.

“I’m gonna comm Prowl and tell him you’re killing me! He’ll come in here rushing and put you in the brig!” 

“Please, he can try. Just tell me what Prime said that got you so moody.” 

“No! It’s none of your business! Optimus swore me to secrecy. Are you telling me you want me to break an oath from a Prime? Tsk tsk brother, that's sacrilege. Optimus would be disappointed in you too.” 

Sideswipe was always good at using his words to get out of sticky situations. Most of the time they were situations that he himself had gotten into, but he was good at getting out of them as well. The only reason they were able to escape the Pits was because Sideswipe had made a ‘deal’ with one of the Pit bosses and was able to finagle their escape and freedom. 

Sunstreaker would forever be grateful to Sideswipe for that, but damn did it piss him off when Sideswipe tried to use his words on him. 

“Try again. Like I care about the oath of a Prime or sacrilege.” Sunstreaker grunted.

A beat.

Silence. 

Sunstreaker could feel Sideswipe contemplating whether he should speak or not. 

Sunstreaker relaxed his frame a little more, putting more of his weight onto Sideswipe.

“Fine! Frag! He just said that he expected better of me and he knows I can do good if I set my processor to it and he was disappointed in me and that he was upset with what I did, okay! Frag, I don’t know why you’re so pressed about it.” Sideswipe finally said. Anger at himself and hurt flowing through his voice and field. 

Sunstreaker pulled himself off Sideswipe and moved his brother to his pedes. Sideswipe’s helm was dipped in shame, refusing to look at Sunstreaker. 

Sunstreaker grabbed Sideswipe and pulled him into a hug, wrapping his arms around his brother's frame and squeezing tight. Sideswipe was tense for a kilk before he realized what Sunstreaker was doing and relaxed into his brother. Sideswipe’s frame sagged as he leaned into Sunstreaker and wrapped his own arms around him. 

“You’re not any of those things Prime said.” Sunstreaker reassured. “You do good every cycle. You make me and the stupid Prime proud all the time even when you annoy me to the Pit and back.” 

Sideswipe chuckled. “Thanks, bro.” 

Safe to say, Sunstreaker didn’t want to get all mopey and upset like his dumb brother (that he was most certainly not worried about. He knew his brother could take care of himself, even if the last time he saw him he was surrounded by Decepticons) because of a talk with Optimus because he didn’t protect a stupid organic that got themselves in this mess and dragged Sunstreaker along.

Heavy blaster fire was heard above Sunstreaker and the human from both Autobot and Decepticon alike, each trying to drive the other off. Seeker engines were roaring throughout the sky, causing the already smokey scenery to become polluted with their trails. He was hunched underneath a building that Sideswipe had inadvertently brought down when he crashed the seeker he was riding. Sunstreaker didn’t care about human architecture but he could tell the human was distressed about the collapse of the building. 

Buildings all around them were collapsed or on the verge of falling, electricity was crackling from the downed powerlines. The streets were in ruin and anything near them had been destroyed by their battle.

It was supposed to be a simple mission. Spec Ops had reported that the Decepticons were sniffing around a major power plant close to a city. Optimus had placed Prowl, Jazz, Mirage, Ironhide, Sideswipe and him around the power plant to check to see if it was worth stealing energy from. And it definitely was. It had to be one of the biggest power plants Sunstreaker had seen. When they arrived at the front of the center, Sunstreaker could see the base went on for miles. It was a prime spot for the Decepticons.

Sunstreaker assumed the human was working at the plant when it was attacked. They were wearing a white coat and the wavy stuff on top of their head was up with strings of it coming out. All the other humans had evacuated the moment Mirage spotted the seekers in the sky but this one. They had run towards the fighting and chaos. And unfortunately for both Sunstreaker and the human, a seeker saw them first.

Sunstreaker and Sideswipe were crouching behind a tall fence when he first noticed the human. She had a small box in their servos and was moving it to where some of the fighting was before moving around to capture something else. Sunstreaker could see the moment the seeker had spotted the human. It was Ramjet, that sadistic fragger. He had been circling the plant, providing cover and shots when needed, but when he saw the human, he diverted his path and started firing towards them. 

They were too occupied recording Starscream and Prowl shooting at each other to notice him. Ramjet transformed and opened his subspace as he was getting closer and Sunstreaker could see a small bomb. Sunstreaker was the only one to notice. He hopped over the fence and ran towards the human. Ramjet saw Sunstreaker hurtling towards the human and sped up.

“Sunny? What are you doing?” Sideswipe shouted at him. He saw Ramjet. “Sunny, come back!” 

Sunstreaker was right on top of the human. As gently as he could, (which wasn’t that much, he didn’t really know how to hold a human. He would hang out with Chip sometimes and had picked him up once, but that was it. Sunstreaker respected Chip’s space and only picked him up when asked. Plus Chip had that chair around him, so it made him easier to grab) he grabbed the human and wrapped his servos around them. He curled in on himself as he heard the whoosh of the bomb falling. 

Ramjet must’ve dropped it earlier than Sunstreaker anticipated because Sunstreaker didn’t feel any pain. He could feel himself flying through the air,  but he kept a tight hold on the human, refusing to let them go. He crashed on the ground on his right side. The way he had tucked himself, he landed heavily on his right shoulder. He heard something creak and snap as he landed and tumbled onto the ground. He put his servos to the center of his chassis to protect the human as he rolled. 

Finally, he came to a stop. He instantly released the human and they rolled out his servos. They popped up and started shouting at Sunstreaker. Or at least, he assumed they were, he couldn’t hear anything over the ringing in his audials and the incessant pain in his shoulder.

Something felt off. He knew he landed on it funny, but it felt more than out of place. He sat up and looked at his shoulder. A large piece of shrapnel was lodged in there, poking out and making every jostle uncomfortable. He knew he couldn’t leave it in there, but he also couldn’t just take it out. Enough scolding from Ratchet had taught him better. Better to leave it in there and let it slowly bleed then take it out and have energon come rushing out.

Frag. Sunstreaker tried to comm Sideswipe, but he was getting nothing. He tried Ironhide, then Jazz and finally Prowl. Nothing.

He looked over his surroundings. He was out in the open and needed shelter. Sunstreaker severely underestimated Ramjet’s bomb, because Sunstreaker didn’t recognize where he was in the plant. Prowl had given them the layout of the area and where to look out for, but Sunstreaker couldn’t pinpoint the area he was in. He looked around and saw a building that had cars hidden in it with multiple layers. Each layer had openings in it but anywhere was better than out in the open so he picked up the human and ran towards the building.

Sunstreaker moved to the very back of the building and sat behind the biggest car he could see and set the human down. They tumbled out of his servos and started yelling at him again. He ignored them and tried comm’ing Sideswipe again, dodging a piece of flying building and putting his uninjured arm out to shield the human. The blast that had separated him from Sideswipe and the others must’ve knocked his comms out. Nothing but static and a faint buzz was heard. 

Frag.

Obviously they had been blasted far away enough from the battle to not be getting shot at, but not close enough to escape the destruction. At least that meant they were close enough to find help.

Sunstreaker reached out to Sideswipe throughout the bond. He could feel Sideswipe. He knew he was still alive, but Sideswipe wasn’t responding. Even in the thickest of battles and messiest of arguments, Sideswipe would answer. Why wasn’t he answering? 

“Are you alright? You sound like you’re panicking. Although I could be completely wrong cause I have no idea what panicking even looks like to you guys, but you don’t look so good. Is that pink stuff supposed to be coming out of you?” The human said. 

Sunstreaker rolled his optics. He didn’t panic. Never in the entire time the war had been going on did Sunstreaker panic. That wasn’t him.

And was she dumb? ‘Is that pink stuff supposed to be coming out of you?’ What a dumbaft question to ask. Of course it’s not!

“No.” Sunstreaker grunted out. He wanted to keep his communication with the human as limited as possible. They were the whole reason he was in this mess.

“So what is it then? Is it your blood? Do you even bleed?” They asked. 

“Be quiet. The Decepticons might hear you.” 

“Please, I’m not worried. I can barely hear myself over everything. Plus, I ain’t afraid of no Decepticons.” They said.

“You should be. They won’t hesitate to kill either one of us.” 

The human went quiet for a kilk. “But you won’t let that happen, right?” 

Sunstreaker closed his optics. If this human would just be quiet for more than a kilk so he could think, then maybe it wouldn’t happen. 

“No.” 

“You sure sound confident y’know. You’ve probably had your fair share of battles but-”

Whatever the human was going to say got cut off by a deafening explosion close to where they were. Sunstreaker couldn’t tell exactly where it was, but it was too close. He instinctively curled around the human, trying to shield them from any damage. Pieces of the building flew over and past Sunstreaker as slabs of concrete and other pieces of the building whipped past him. Pain fled through Sunstreaker’s shoulder as he moved. Every movement felt like his shoulder was on fire.

The building started to creak. The ground beneath Sunstreaker was beginning to crack and he could see the walls starting to crumble. The stairs close to Sunstreaker were cracking and slowly ripping apart.

 “I think the building is coming down!” The human shouted.

“We gotta move.” Sunstreaker said, ignoring the pain and picking the human up. It would be easier to travel if he could transform, but he didn’t know what would happen if he tried that with the shrapnel in his shoulder. 

“But if we go out there, won’t the Decepticons see us?” The human asked.

“Would you rather be crushed by a building?”

“Well no but-” Once again the human was interrupted by a loud blast and a cracking, popping sound was heard all around them. 

Slag. Sunstreaker couldn’t stand all the way up in the building, he could either crawl or stand up halfway with his back haunched, but with his shoulder, that didn’t seem very likely. He didn’t want to lower himself so much as to crawl in front of the human, but that seemed to be the only choice he had. 

Sunstreaker released the human onto the floor. “What are you doing?” They immediately demanded, “We’ve gotta get out of here!” 

“We are. But I can’t carry you fast enough out of here and I can’t transform either. You’ve got to run. I’ll have to-” Sunstreaker felt like purging, having to admit this to a human, “-crawl behind you. I can’t stand all the way up.” 

“What about your shoulder? It looks really bad. I don’t think you should put any pressure on it.” 

Sunstreaker was about to reply before part of the wall to the left of the started to give way. “Go!” Sunstreaker shouted and gave the human a push. They stumbled but caught their footing and started sprinting as fast as they could. If Sideswipe saw this he’d never let me live it down, Sunstreaker thought to himself as he lowered his frame onto the floor, careful of his shoulder, and started crawling as fast as he could towards the exit. The human was already half way there as Sunstreaker was steadily approaching. 

“Hurry up!” He shouted at them. They didn’t turn to look as they shouted back. “I’m going as fast as I can! You’re the one who put us in the very back of the building!”

Sunstreaker wanted to punt this human. Very badly. 

Sunstreaker heard another wall collapse behind him. It had to have been a main wall, because he could feel the rest of the building falling behind him. Cars and concrete were falling all around him and the human. It was like the building was chasing them, either trying to hurry them out the building or have them go down with it. 

The human was almost out. He could see the sunlight and the smoke outside. They were close. He was so close. 

Sunstreaker turned his helm towards a rumbling sound and a large piece of concrete knocked into his helm, tearing through his left audial fin. He grunted in pain but kept moving. Pieces of the building were falling on his back, leaving dents and scuffing his paint. 

Frag this stupid aft building man.

The human stopped right at the entrance. They turned around and started waving their arms around at Sunstreaker. 

“What are you doing!? The exit is right there, keep going!” 

“Hurry up! I’m not gonna leave you!” The human said. Sunstreaker would be touched but he did not risk his life for some stupid human just so they could die in this building just because they didn’t want to leave him behind.

Something sliced through Sunstreaker’s left thigh and he cried out at the sudden pain. He turned back to look and saw a large steel beam coming out of his left leg.

“Oh for frags sake!” He twisted his frame as much as he could manage and yanked the beam out. He snarled as energon started to flow and tossed the beam as far as he could. He kept crawling. He was so close. The human was waiting for him. Stupidly waiting for him, but waiting nonetheless. 

A green car that looked kinda looked like Hound was falling towards the human. Their attention was so locked on Sunstreaker that they didn’t see it, and once again, Sunstreaker did. 

He rushed forward and wrapped himself around the human. The car slammed into his backside and Sunstreaker lurched inwards at the pain of the car bouncing off of him. He picked up the human and tossed her out the building. He took one final leap (as much as a leap one can do crouched down) and was out the building. 

He sprawled out on his back and vented. He did it. He got out. He was safe. 

“Well look what we have here.” An agitating, grating voice interrupted Sunstreaker’s one tiny moment of peace.

He shot up instantly, but his leg buckled underneath him. He stumbled for a moment before standing back up, putting all of his weight onto his right leg. He tried to pull out his blaster before remembering he lost it somewhere trying to protect the human. Servos only then. He’s fine with that. 

Thrust, Ramjet, and Dirge stood in front of him, nullrays at the ready. It seemed Ramjet had come back to finish the job. 

“I wouldn’t try anything if I were you, Autobot. We know how much these organics mean to you.” Thrust raised his servo and he had that stupid human in it. Didn’t they know how to run? Sunstreaker was beginning to think they weren’t the effort he was putting in to protect them. 

“Let the human go, Thrust. They don’t have anything to do with this. Just let them go.” Sunstreaker tried to negotiate. He raised his servos in surrender.

Ramjet scoffed. “The great Sunstreaker is lowering himself to a human? How the mighty have fallen.” They laughed. Well, Ramjet and Thrust laughed, Dirge was barely chuckling, looking like he wanted to be anywhere but here. Sunstreaker could use that. If he could get the upper servo on the depressed conehead, then maybe he could make a trade.

Sunstreaker getting the human back and beating the slag out of the coneheads. 

Thrust’s grip was tight on the human. They were struggling in his hold, banging their fist and wiggling in his hold. 

“Human.” Sunstreaker said, getting their attention and the coneheads as they stopped laughing. “What’s your designation?” 

“My what? What are you talking about? Get me out of here already!” They shouted. 

“Your-your, frag, what’s it called. Your name. What is your name?” 

“My-my name? What does that have to do with anything?” 

“For frags sake just tell me your name!” 

“Itai! My name is Itai!” They-she said.

“Shut the frag up!” Thrust interrupted. “What does knowing her designation have to do with anything? It’s not gonna matter when she’s splattered on the ground. Here, Dirge, take the human while we beat this ground pounder into slag.”

What a mistake. 

Thrust tossed Itai to Dirge and he clumsily caught her, almost dropping her, making Sunstreaker’s spark drop for a kilk. He cupped her in his servos and brought her to his chest, holding tightly.

Sunstreaker lunged. He rammed into Thrust first, slamming him into the ground. Dazed by the sudden assault, Thrust tried to raise his nullrays and shoot Sunstreaker, but he missed. 

Sunstreaker ripped one of the nullrays off and Thrust cried out. He tried to fire it before realizing it wouldn’t work. 

Slag. Sunstreaker should’ve known better than to think his nullray would work off Thrust’s frame. He bashed the nullray across Thrust’s faceplate. 

Ramjet seemed to finally realize what was going on and started firing on Sunstreaker, and inadvertently, Thrust. 

“You fool!” Thrust yelled in between the beating, “Stop firing, you’ll hit me too!” 

A stray shot hit Sunstreaker in the chassis, but he wasn’t deterred. With one final strike, Thrust’s nullray broke across his faceplate and the conehead was out. Sunstreaker snarled and leapt towards Ramjet. Another shot hit Sunstreaker, but he ignored it, tackling the other conehead to the ground. 

“Get off you stupid fragger!” Ramjet tried to push Sunstreaker off, but he wouldn’t budge. Ramjet noticed the piece of shrapnel in his shoulder and reached for it, pushing it farther into Sunstreaker’s plating. He yelled. In rage or pain, he wasn’t sure. Anger clouding his processor at letting this happen, letting the human get caught in their fight, at getting hurt, at everything. 

Sunstreaker kneed Ramjet in the chin, making him lose his hold on the shrapnel. Ramjet reached for it again, but before he could grab it, Sunstreaker slammed his faceplate into the ground. He yanked the shrapnel out of his shoulder before Ramjet could reach for it. Energon splattered over Ramjet’s faceplate. Sunstreaker reached up and plunged the shrapnel into one of Ramjet’s wings. The conehead cried out and tried to kick Sunstreaker off of him again but it was useless. Sunstreaker was angry. He yanked the shrapnel out of the conehead’s wing and with one swift, brutal movement, Sunstreaker smashed the shrapnel into Ramjet’s helm, effectively knocking him unconscious. 

Two coneheads down, one to go.

Sunstreaker looked up and saw Dirge. The conehead was shaking in fear as Sunstreaker set his optics on him. 

Sunstreaker stood up and kicked Ramjet’s frame away. His leg was slick and it felt like it was on fire, but he kept on. Itai’s life was at stake. At this point, saving her was more important to him than whatever Optimus might say about it. 

“L-look mech, I’ll let the human go, just don’t hurt me.” Sunstreaker was seething. Now the conehead wants mercy? Sunstreaker wouldn’t give it to him. 

“Drop the human.” Sunstreaker demanded. His words felt…off. A little slurred. No, it didn’t matter. Whatever was wrong with him could wait, he was so close to getting Itai, he couldn’t stop now. 

“Okay okay!” Dirge said, instantly dropping Itai, she fell and hit the ground with an ‘oof.’

“I can’t let you off scot free now can I? How bad would it look for you if you walked out of this fine but your trine didn’t? That wouldn’t be nice of me.” Sunstreaker taunted, slowly walking closer to the blue conehead. 

“No, p-please!” Dirge immediately transformed and fled. Sunstreaker started to give chase after him, but his legs buckled underneath him before he could get far. He tried to push himself up, but the pain in his frame kept him down. Energon was dripping from various places in his frame, some slipped into one of his optics. He cycled them, but the energon stayed. 

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if he rested his optics for a second. The humanI-Itai- she was safe. That’s all that matters. He could rest. He felt dizzy. His helm hurt.

He heard noises, but he couldn’t tell where it was coming from. Something was shaking his arm. It hurt. He groaned. 

“-op it! Get up! What if they come back? I need you! Get up! You’re bleeding everywhere, what do I do? You’re huge! I can’t just get a rag and stop it like with a person. Shit shit shit what do I do?” Someone was saying. It had to be Itai. She was…worried about him? Why? He was fine. He was a little tired, but he was fine. He just needed to close his optics for a klik and he’d be fine.

“Are you…okay.” Sunstreaker mumbled. All of his efforts would be for nothing if Itai was hurt.

“I’m fine, you big yellow booger! You should be worried about yourself, you’re bleeding, like everywhere! And we’re out in the open again, what if more Decepticons come? We have to move! Get up, get up, get up!” She started pushing Sunstreaker, or that’s what he was assuming that she was doing. It felt more like he was being poked by Sideswipe.

Sideswipe would tell him to get up. He wished Sideswipe was here. He pinged him through the bond, but it felt faint. Something must’ve been wrong with Sideswipe. He…he needed to get up. 

“-wipe.” He mumbled. His words felt slow and slurred. Like his mouth was full of unprocessed energon. Ew. 

“W-what? Wipe? Who is wipe?” Itai asked.

“Side….Sideswipe” 

“Is that your friend? I don’t know if they’re fighting anymore. Do you really want me to risk it? I can’t leave you though!” 

“...Go.” He could barely get that out. His processor felt like mush.

Sunstreaker’s optics felt heavy. He was so tired. He trusted Itai to get help. Mostly. As long as she didn’t get distracted by the fighting and almost get crushed again. He wouldn’t be there to save her again. 

“I’ll be back. And I won’t be crushed. You gotta trust.” He could hear her tiny pedesteps getting farther and farther away. 

Sunstreaker chuckled. She would definitely get crushed and all his work would be for nothing. 

He closed his optics. He’d wait for her to get back. 

_______________________________________________________

“-ver here!” 

“-ly shit! You can fix-”

“-treak-”

“Sunny!” 

“-move him now!”

“I’m here, bro. Don-”

Servos were on him. One pair felt incredibly smaller than the other. He tried to open his optics, but they wouldn’t budge. He had to assume that Itai had gotten help. She was okay then. Good. He did a good job. Optimus wouldn’t be disappointed. 

“-saved my life, you can’t die on me now!”

“-re gonna be okay, kid.”

“-nny-”

“You’re gonna be okay, kid.”

He felt movement and all was lost again.

________________________________________________________

As Sunstreaker felt his systems slowly start to online, the first thing he could feel was weak. He hated feeling weak. Feeling weak meant something went wrong. Meant that he couldn’t protect someone. 

Sunstreaker had only felt weak a handful of times. And he hated each and every moment of it. Like when Sideswipe was scheduled to fight in a match without Sunstreaker, or when he got hurt during one of those matches. Or when he was first getting to know Bluestreak, and the Praxian came to him during one of his panic attacks. Weak was something Sunstreaker hated, and never wanted to feel.

Sunstreaker needed to move. He could tell he was in the medbay, the sterile smell and uncomfortable berth underneath him was a dead giveaway. Why was he in the medbay though? He couldn’t remember doing anything that would have him stuck in here. He wasn’t trying to hear Ratchet’s scolding about getting himself hurt again or Sideswipe’s annoyingness as he bugged Sunstreaker to ‘distract him from the pain.’ And he most certainly wasn’t trying to worry Bluestreak by being in the medbay. So what happened?

Sunstreaker tried to open his optics, but they felt heavy. He grunted. Curse his stupid frame for not listening to him. His helm still hurt. Everything felt heavy.

“Sunstreaker? Are you awake? Do I need to get Ratchet? Are you in pain? Can you hear me? Sunstreaker? I just comm’d Ratchet, he’s on the way. He said it’s too early for you to be awake yet, but he doesn’t know you like I do. I know that you’re mad that you got hurt so you’re fighting yourself even if that’s making things worse. I hope you are awake, I want to hear your voice, but it’s probably best that you aren’t so you can heal better. We all know the nano-klik you're awake you’re gonna want to be released, but you were hurt pretty bad, so Ratchet is definitely not gonna let that happen. Well, it wasn’t that bad from what Sideswipe told me, but he did say you lost a lot of energon, and I know that’s bad.”

Bluestreak. Sunstreaker would know his sparkmates rambling from anywhere. He could listen to Bluestreak talk until the end of time, but with the way his helm was feeling, he could take maybe about three more words.

“Shh…” Sunstreaker weakly said, still fighting to get his optics open. 

“Sh- what? What are you trying to say? Shiny? Shout? Man, I don’t know many words that start with S and H. Uh, shape?” 

“I think he’s trying to tell you to be quiet, Bluestreak. With the helm injury he got, I’m surprised he’s even coherent enough to tell you that.” Ratchet’s voice chimed in, ever the voice of reason of knowing what his patients need. 

“Oh!” Bluestreak’s voice dropped down to a whisper. “Sorry, Sunny. I forgot that you might be sensitive to stuff like that. I’m glad that you’re finally awake though. I’ve been really worried. So has Sideswipe, but you know he’ll never admit it.”

Finally, Sunstreaker got his optics to open. But as soon as he did, a bright light pierced into his processor and he shut them immediately again. He tried to move his arm to cover his optics, but it didn’t respond to him. 

“Ah the lights, sorry kid. I didn’t think about those.” Sunstreaker heard movement and the sound of something flickering.

“You can open your optics now. Ratchet turned off the lights. Well, not off off, but dim enough that it shouldn’t hurt you but we can still see.” Bluestreak said, still whispering.

Sunstreaker opened his optics again, and just like Bluestreak said, it was dimmer. Bluestreak was hovering over him with a worried look on his faceplates, but it immediately brightened when he saw Sunstreaker looking at him. 

“Sunny! I’m so glad you’re awake! Sideswipe is gonna be so happy once he gets off shift. You’ve only been in stasis for like a cycle and a half, Ratchet said it would be best to keep you there for as long as your frame needed so it could internally recover. Ratchet thought you would be out for at least four more cycles, but I told him you would never stay out that long.” Bluestreak said, gripping Sunstreaker’s servo into his and rubbing his digits over Sunstreakers.

“And unfortunately, he was right.” Ratchet had pulled a datapad out from somewhere, presumably Sunstreaker’s data chart. “According to my scans and the amount of energon you lost, you should’ve been in stasis for at least a decacycle, but when have you ever listened to what I had to say.”

Sunstreaker smirked. At least he was still being a pain in the aft even if he didn’t know why he was in here.

Pain blossomed all over Sunstreaker’s frame. He winced at the sudden onslaught of agony. 

“What happened?” Sunstreaker asked. His processor felt like it was on fire and he couldn’t remember anything.

“You mean you don’t know? Ratchet-” Worry shot through Bluestreak’s voice at Sunstreaker’s question but before he could get anything out, the medbay doors shot open and a red figure came dashing through, sprinting right towards Sunstreaker.

“Sideswipe? I thought you were still on patrol?”

Sideswipe he’s only just woken up, don't do anything-!”

Sideswipe leapt through the air and right onto Sunstreaker, earning a surprised ‘oof’ in response as Sideswipe wrapped his arms around Sunstreaker’s frame as much as he could and hugged Sunstreaker tightly. 

In his shock, Sunstreaker didn’t move. Sideswipe was definitely the touchy, huggy twin between the two, but Sunstreaker was expecting Sideswipe to launch himself over to him.

“Get off him you big oaf! You’re going to mesh his welds!” Ratchet yelled. 

Sideswipe immediately got off Sunstreaker and dusted him off. “Sorry bro I forgot about that. I felt you wake up and came straight over. Though if Prowl asks, I was on patrol with Bumblebee the entire time.” 

“You stupid-!” Ratchet sighed and rubbed his optics. “You are going to be the death of me one day.”

“Not if I can help it.” Sideswipe replied, winking at the medic, before turning his attention back to his brother. “You alright though bro? How are you feeling? You were banged up to the pit when we found you.”  

“I’m fine, Sides. Just confused about what happened.”

“Con-? Confused? Oh Primus Ratchet does he have memory loss? Does he know who he is? Does he know who I am?” 

Sunstreaker tried to roll his optics, but a sharp pain in the back of his processor stopped him. “Oh shut up you idiot. I still remember everything, just not how I got here.”

“Is that bad, Ratchet?” Bluestreak chimed in. 

“It’s not bad, just something to keep an eye on.” Ratchet turned his full attention to Sunstreaker. “You have a mild processor concussion, but as long as you stay off your pedes for a few cycles, and listen to my advice, you’ll be fine.”

“Great.” Sunstreaker deadpanned, he could learn about his injuries later, he just wanted to know what happened for Primus sake. “So can you tell me what happened now?” 

“I was getting to it, you impatient glitch. You were out on a mission, watching over a power plant for Decepticon activity when they attacked the plant. A human hadn’t evacuated yet and was about to get hurt when you saved her.” 

What.

He got hurt…from protecting an organic?

“You’re joking.” Sunstreaker said, disbelief radiating from his field. He couldn’t stand humans! Sure, they helped the Autobots out with energon and some of them were their friends, but for the most part, they were nothing more to Sunstreaker than just the stupidly easy to crush natives of this planet. He would not go out of his way to save one. But…Ratchet didn’t have any reason to lie.

“I bet you wish he was. We were shooting at some ‘Cons then all of a sudden you just hopped over and ran towards a human! She was just out in the middle of the fight, recording everything when Ramjet saw her and I guess was gonna hurt her. Then you saw and jumped to save her. Ramjet dropped some kind of bomb and you got caught up in it cause the next thing I knew you were gone. Luckily the Decepticons weren’t expecting us to be at the plant so we overpowered them easily, but I couldn’t find you, and you weren’t responding to me. I’m looking for you after buckethead called a retreat and the next thing I know, the human that you saved comes running up to me and says you’re hurt.”

“It wasn’t pretty bro. It looked like someone had dropped a building on you and beat the slag out of you. And according to the human, that’s exactly what happened.” 

Frag. It was coming back to Sunstreaker. The fighting. Seeing the human and jumping to protect her. Finding shelter in the building and it collapsing. The fight with the coneheads. Oh Primus, he really did risk his life for a human.

“Itai. Her name is Itai. Is she alright?” Sunstreaker asked, suppressing the embarrassment in his field. Optimus would be proud, he reminded himself. It doesn’t matter whatever Sideswipe and the others would tease him with later on, Optimus would be proud.

“Oh she’s fine. She’s been stopping by the Ark every chance she gets to see if you have woken up. She was really worried about you. Her faceplates were leaking when she got to me and she wouldn’t stop screaming at Ratchet to fix you.” 

“Oh.” Sunstreaker said. His spark felt funny at the thought of a human caring about him. 

“She said she would stop by later.” Ratchet informed him. “And assuming that word has already gotten around that you’re awake, I’m sure it’ll be soon.”

“He just woke up, what makes you think everyone knows?” Bluestreak asked. 

“I’m already hearing complaints from Prowl about how Sideswipe ditched Bumblebee and mechs are sure to have seen you racing down here. Two and two can easily be put together.” Ratchet said. 

“Frag! He knows already? How?” Sideswipe exclaimed. 

“You know nothing gets by him, Sideswipe.” Bluestreak said.

“Whatever. I actually have a good excuse this time. My brother dearest had awoken from his deep stasis and I just had to make sure that he was alright.” Sideswipe said dramatically. “He can suck it for all I care, I wasn’t going to miss being here for you, Sunny.” 

Sunstreaker pinged his warmth through the bond over to Sideswipe, happy to be able to feel it again.

Once again, the medbay doors slid open, but this time, the massive frame of Optimus Prime came through the doors, holding his servos to his chassis. 

“Optimus! What are you doing here? Came to check on Sunny yourself? He’s just the attention-getter in this cycle isn’t he?” Bluestreak said, waving to Optimus as he walked towards them. 

“Yes I did.” Optimus said, his voice gentle and warm as he greeted Ratchet. “But I also brought a friend.” Sensing the message, or maybe something being said over comms, Ratchet brought a stool beside Optimus and he placed whatever he was holding onto it. 

It was the human. Itai. She was here. She had come to see Sunstreaker. He wasn’t sure how to feel about that.

“You!” She said the second she was put down, getting as closer to Sunstreaker as the stool allowed her to, “You scared the shit out of me! Don’t do that again! What was I supposed to do if I couldn’t find Sideswipe? Or if they were still fighting the Decepticons? What if I got crushed!? And then when I found him and the others and brought them to you, I thought you were dead! How dare you!” 

Sunstreaker stared. Bluestreak and Sideswipe started laughing. Ratchet smirked and beneath Optimus’ facemask, Sunstreaker just knew he was smiling too.

Itai jumped onto the bed and wrapped her body around Sunstreaker’s arm as much as she could. “I’m glad you’re okay.” 

“I’m….glad you’re okay too.” Sunstreaker said. His plating felt warm where Itai was holding it. 

“What? Is the big bad Sunstreaker actually admitting that he cares for a human?” Sideswipe teased. 

~I’m going to beat you~ Sunstreaker said over the bond.

~Please. You probably can’t even stand right now.~

~I’ll still do it~

~I’d like to see you try~

“You did a very noble thing, Sunstreaker.” Optimus said, interrupting his internal conflict with Sideswipe. “You didn’t have to save Itai but you did. I’m proud of you.”

Sunstreaker’s faceplates warmed and Bluestreak cooed. “I’m proud of you too, Sunny. But I know it’s different coming from Optimus.” Bluestreak whispered to him. 

Sunstreaker felt overwhelmed by positive emotions. “Thanks, Prime.” Was all he managed to get out despite the tenderness that was radiating from the inside of him at hearing those words from Optimus.

Optimus’ optics crinkled at Sunstreaker’s thanks. His field was pouring out proudness and affection. 

“Hey, I wasn’t done.” Itai said, knocking on Sunstreaker’s plating.

“Oh, my apologies, Itai.” Optimus said.

“Oh you’re fine, Optimus. I wasn’t done yelling at ‘Sunny’ over here.” She said, squinting her optics and Sunstreaker.

“That’s Sunstreaker to you.” He corrected. 

“Yeah we’ll see.” She replied back.

“I’ll take my leave then.” Optimus said. “Itai, you are welcome here as long as you please. Tell Ratchet or Bluestreak whenever you are ready to leave and we will have someone take you.”

“Thank you, Optimus.” Optimus dipped his helm and left.

“Hey, pick me up. I need to tell you something.” Itai demanded. 

“You’re mean, you know that.” Sunstreaker said as he carefully picked her up and held her in his servo. 

“I know. It’s one of my most charming traits.” 

“You two would get along perfectly then.” Sideswipe taunted. Sunstreaker glared and Sideswipe laughed. 

“Closer. It’s really important.” She said. Sunstreaker brought her up close to his faceplates. She gripped his chin. 

“What are you doing?” He asked. 

“I’m hugging you. This is a hug. Or it’s supposed to be, but you’re ten times my size so this is the best you’re gonna get.” 

“Thanks for saving my life.” Itai said. She let go of his faceplate and he brought her back down to his chassis.

Sunstreaker noticed she had something black wrapped around her wrist. “I thought you said you were alright?” 

Itai followed his optics to her arm and looked back at him. “Oh I am, promise. It’s just when that Decepticon dropped me I landed on my arm funny. I’m grateful that this and a few cuts and bruises were all I got from that whole ordeal.” 

“It won’t happen again.” Sunstreaker said, promising to himself as much as her. 

“It definitely won’t. The next time I see some Decepticons, I’m getting the fuck out of there.” She laughed. “I’m not trying to have another Autobot risk their life for me.” 

“They won’t be as pretty as me if there is a next time.” Sunstreaker gloated.

“From all the guys I’ve seen here, you’re like the top twenty best.” She said.

Sunstreaker almost dropped her. “How dare you. I’m beginning to think I should’ve left you out there.”

“Yeah right. What would Optimus Prime say then?” 

Sunstreaker glared. She had to go. She knew his weakness. How to extort him. He couldn’t have that.