#mumpitzhausen

Jan 7th - National Pass Gas Day

Jan 6th - National Bean Day - Cuddle up Day

Jan 5th - National Bird Day - National Whipped Cream Day (USA)

(Original post: http://www.johnskylar.com/post/82996706080/masochistic-writer-does-tumblr-ask-event. Tag for all posts: #noirproject.  Since I don't think tumblr notifies people of asks, I'll do it for them: mumpitzen , here ya go!)

In this biz, your worst enemy is your client’s memory, because it’ll send you to the red herring market faster than your Jewish grandmother.

They see crimes, they think they remember, but they don’t.

For that, I’ve got Frau Mumpitz, my go-to sketch artist.  She’s an old friend from back when I was a beat cop in the Village.  Feels like fifteen minutes ago that I saw her on the street corner, her table full of sketch art.  A lot of pretty things that bled, and bleeding things that were pretty.  Reminded me of being a cop.

I got her card, and here we are, years later, in her flat, a client describing the guy who kidnapped her daughter, and Mumpitz with a pencil in her mouth and charcoal rubbing over the sketch.  The drawing was black and white, which seemed funny since every time I saw her, her hair was a different color.  Red, this time.  That’s trouble hair.

I scanned the bookshelves, seeing the dark corners of comics and Gaiman novels.  I always liked her type, too smart to be normal.

Problem is, she’s always trying to add fancy beauty elements to the sketches.  A couple of times my clients have complained about a squirrel crawling up a perp’s leg, or a see-through chest cavity.